Fall outs with children

[ASD Parent]

It seems two of my three children are always falling out with me because I find going to social situations difficult and they think as a mother, I can't be bothered. I've explained I find it difficult but I've had abusive responses from I'm a liar to they've had enough of me . Does anyone else get this kind of trouble ?

 

[Spinning Compass]

How old are your children and what kind of social situations specifically are they asking you to go to?

This is a slightly different situation but it might help to understand where your children might be coming from. Some years ago I had a "friend"--at least she said she wanted to be my friend--who followed a much stricter interpretation of Christianity than I did. Apparently people in her church were not encouraged to socialize with those outside the church, but they could evangelize and recruit them. The result was a very one-sided relationship as far as I was concerned. No matter how much I tried to find common ground, there was none to be found. It was very frustrating to issue invitations over and over only to have them rejected. Things that I thought were neutral, weren't. After a while, I became tired of it and said that I was very sorry but I did not see how we could continue the friendship under those circumstances. (I also felt she was not being 100% honest about the situation--if she'd said that her church didn't encourage outside friendships then I could respect that instead of pretending we were both equal when we were not.)

I am not saying that is the situation with you. But I wonder if the proportions of "no's" to "yeses" might be somewhat lopsided and as a result may be causing some resentment. I've found that people are willing to bend somewhat and compromise if they feel the other person is willing to do the same. How about saying, "you know I don't like going to that restaurant because it is too noisy but I know a nice little cafe where it isn't so stressful," for example?