This is my problem...
I have an above average IQ according to a standardized Mensa test taken couple decades ago. I am also one of the worst persons you should ever ask any opinion about if you have any emotional problems at all.
I have spend my whole life learning about correct responses to emotional situations from a psychological literature, self-help books, movies, analyzing situations etc. While I can come up with something useful when given some time, all of it is just a theoretical stuff. I suck when it comes to real life and real time situations.
I blame a different way of thinking: What comforts me is most likely not the same thing that comforts others. What would insult others, might not insult me. What would be a small issue to others, can be a huge issue to me. And other way around.
So I can't use my intuition, or my own responses to emotions, as a reference. I just have to resort on learned rules. And I fail on that often.
I wonder if an emotional intelligence, or lack of it, is really the issue? Would I be smart in EQ if I would meet someone who is exactly like me? Do I fail in EQ only because most of situations are too different world to me? How much of EQ is learned and how much of it should be inborn? How much of emotinal responses are cultural behavior and thus learnable?
I agree that studying helps, but the whole concept of intelligence remains fuzzy...