Do Aspies enjoy reunions?

[Butterfly88]

I think it depends on the aspie. For me if there were people I wanted to see I'd go but if not I wouldn't. And I'd probably leave early, I wear out quick at social events.

 

[Marmot]

I went to my 10 year HS reunion only because (10 years prior) I had promised someone that I would be there no matter what, and unfortunately when I give someone my word like that it supersedes any situational discomfort....... It's a given that in any such environment or social structure "the birds of a feather will flock together" so that was to be expected, but the one thing that I noticed / that I really wanted to stand up and say to everyone was: What happened to all of you, you look so old !

It's been theorized & mentioned in other posts here that aspies don't seem to age as fast, and this was definitely the case there. Either that, or everyone but me had been partying real hard ever since and that was the effect.

Now that my initial promise has been kept, they (my HS class) will never see me again. I'll be happy to be referenced in any future reunions like D-Day from the movie 'Animal House' (ie: Whereabouts Unknown). The two people from my years in HS that I wanted to keep in touch with, I keep in touch with. So for the rest of them: I wish them well.

 

[FreeDiver]

I went to my 10 year HS reunion only because (10 years prior) I had promised someone that I would be there no matter what, and unfortunately when I give someone my word like that it supersedes any situational discomfort....... It's a given that in any such environment or social structure "the birds of a feather will flock together" so that was to be expected, but the one thing that I noticed / that I really wanted to stand up and say to everyone was: What happened to all of you, you look so old !

It's been theorized & mentioned in other posts here that aspies don't seem to age as fast, and this was definitely the case there. Either that, or everyone but me had been partying real hard ever since and that was the effect.

Now that my initial promise has been kept, they (my HS class) will never see me again. I'll be happy to be referenced in any future reunions like D-Day from the movie 'Animal House' (ie: Whereabouts Unknown). The two people from my years in HS that I wanted to keep in touch with, I keep in touch with. So for the rest of them: I wish them well.

Now that you've been through the hell of going to that reunion. I'll bet you wish you had never made that promise in the first place. RIGHT? None the less. I'am glad to see that you keep your word. That really says a lot about you. Even though nobody there at the reunion really gave a sh!t. At least it gives you a clear conscious, and that's something to be respected.

 

[Meistersinger]

I went to exactly ONE high school reunion. At that reunion, most of the people were the exact same jackasses they were in high school 15 years earlier. My 40th reunion comes up this year. I have no intention on going to this reunion, as those that I see in public from my graduating class are still jackasses.

 

[RidingDutchman]

I'm a bit too young for reunions yet but I do already know I won't be going to any. I have problems enough trying to remember the names of my current classmates and colleagues so I probably wouldn't remember any from high school. (After 3 years in the same class I had to hand out all the graded tests and halfway I faked that I had to go to the toilet really bad because for the rest of the names, I had no idea who they were)

I didn't really like those people and don't have any contact with them anymore, so I really don't see the point in going to a reunion. I would probably just stand there and be awkward.

Another reason why not to go: back in high school I was one of the smartest kids in class and after that my education plummeted downhill, I don't really feel like telling everybody what a big failure I am.

 

[Marmot]

as those that I see in public from my graduating class are still jackasses.

I had a scaled down, short term similar experience to this as about 1/3 of my graduating HS class ended up attending the same university as me, and although we're talking about 80 former classmates intermingled within a university population of 20,000+ it was inevitable that from time to time, I would still have to encounter them...... I hated this as when I graduated (from HS as well as university) I was so ready to move on and not look back. -I now live far far away with no possibility of ever running into these people so the pressure at that level is alleviated.

My sympathies, Meistersinger that you must endure such things when running to the grocery store and such in your day-to-day life......

 

[clg114]

This spring it will be 52 years since I graduated from high school and I never have been to a reunion. Because of the social pressure, I did not like high school. I have never had the desire to relive those days. I do not do well at social functions. If it were not for my wife to guide me, I would not do any social functions.

 

[Nitro]

I was supposed to finish my general education in highschool,but instead learned to play political games for my benefit. I horse traded automotive repairs and detailing with school staff for time away from classrooms. During my senior year I came in late each day but had a fool proof scam with the attendance girls which gave me the option of saying I was improperly added to the list as tardy,but was actually at home sick if I missed a class that wasn't involved in scamming. There was never a parent home so I gave them a wrong number that would never get answered as a call number for my home.I had a study hall first thing in the morning where I did all my homework so that part was easy.I took tests in classrooms where my only requirement to pass was my signature on the test. I knew the work they were teaching and could possibly at the time taught their class better and they knew it.

I was really interested in pencil drawings done as photo-realistic art. I could copy a black and white photograph to perfection,many drawings taking weeks to complete.I was able to dabble in any art I chose because I was pretty good and my teacher had met my suspected spectrum grandfather who taught me and saw his oils he did.

Once,the rest of the class was screwing up perspective. There was some crazy format he gave us with a specified vanishing point. He wanted the work to be formatted in portrait style. There was a required archway. a focal point in the center and a patterned floor on the bottom. He said we all had to do it and there would be no exceptions.

I was pissed to the max,because I didn't lack that skill and was presently busy with another work in progress. Just to be a prick,I rotated the format 90 degrees clockwise and started to sketch. I gave him all the elements he wanted. There was a simple but sculpted archway that repeated down the picture to infinity. The focal point was a Duesenberg with wire wheels and the flexible exhaust pipes thru the engine cowl. The checkerboard floor was black and white. The white tiles were blank,but the black tiles had the reflections of the car and archway on them to infinity. I slid it under another student's art when I turned it in. I got a failing grade for not following format. A week later,he still hadn't given it back to me. It had been entered in a statewide art show at a mall in the middle of my state. It collected their top ribbon

The perspective I taught the teacher was to never order me to do art ever again

I used the time for artwork from the classrooms I failed to attend while I was there. I had a pass to go there and was untouchable for being there.I was able to manipulate my scheduling to allow me to take all three lunch periods each day that I was actually at school. The vocational-technical students left at the last lunch along with the work releasers,so there was always an out-flux of students at that time and slipping away was easy in the crowd. I didn't attend a full day of school for my entire last year.

I'm not sure how I would actually fit in to a reunion of a school I rarely attended

 

[Myway]

I strongly dislike reunions of any kind. The noise is too much, not to mention all the people.

 

[Tom]

The process of going is very difficult, but I usually enjoy them once I get there. As long as I can leave in a reasonable time, for I have a definate limit.

 

[FreeDiver]

Although there were several teachers who meant a great deal to me, who were very encouraging and helpful that I would have liked to see again.

I did a semester of theater and I would have to say that my drama teacher was one of the best teacher I ever had. That was one teacher in my life that I wouldn't mind seeing again. Too bad she pass away.

What I did do was visit people while in the city that I have had limited contact with by email and christmas cards and such a few years back. Primarily wanted to see how they were, and discovered that many of my classmates were not as successful as they maintained, nor as satisfied with their lives as they seemed from their 'happy' cards and facebook. They lived normal, everyday lives. I'd assumed that because they had more advantages than I did; their education was paid for, that they didn't have to work during school as I did. Or that they came from the upper middle class, they would be more content. None of them were, beyond the fact that they had more advantages, they did not seem happy with the way their lives had turned out. It was not anything they said or did, it was something that I perceived.

One of the biggest thing I've discovered about NT's, is that they seem to like to make other think that they are doing better then they really are. I don't know if this is an ego thing or a fear of being weak or whatever.

 

[Meistersinger]

On the other hand, you have family reunions. Dad came from a large family. He had 3 older sisters and 2 younger brothers. The only siblings left are his 2 younger brothers, and I'm not even sure if the next to the youngest brother is still alive, since he is suffering the same thing that killed dad, namely, cancer of the liver.

Of all the cousins, I only get along with 4 of them, and they are brothers. Their parents were farmers, and their Mom and Dad made damn sure they never forgot from whence the came. The eldest just retired as a chemical engineer, the next oldest is retired Air Force, and is currently a contractor at Ft. Detrick, the next to youngest (who's my age), is currently employed by Merck, running a 5 year study on the human pamphyloma vaccine, and the youngest is an ordained Presbyterian minister, who is currently a missionary in Croatia (his wife is Croat, and his 4 daughters are now in college). The other cousins can pound sand up their rears, since they're the most condescending bunch of bastards you ever wanted to meet. From the way their parents treated my mom and dad, as well as me and my brothers, we were worse than (and forgive the epithet, as I really not racist) n!ggers. Mom, Dad and my brothers were treated that way because dad married beneath himself: he married the eldest daughter of the town drunk, and was never forgiven for doing so!

 

[Meistersinger]

I don't even enjoy the church dinners, which is tantamount to blasphemy for a Baptist.

Around here, that would be blasphemy for a Lutheran! The Southern Fried Baptists around here don't even serve the poor or the needy, most of the time. They're too caught up in the so-called Prosperity Gospel.

 

[peoplesrjames]

I think the advent of social media has decreased the need for school reunions. Those that I wish to keep in touch with are a direct message away.

Family reunions, I always have lots of other plans during the summer.

 

[Judge]

Family reunion? I suppose I could say I've been to one in 1978 if that's what it actually was.

But a high school reunion? No. Never.

 

[Coupe]

I've been to many family reunions in my lifetime...I love my family/ies, but the reunions are not my favorite things in the whole wide world, honestly. If I was going to spend time with family, I'd prefer it was at my maternal grandparents' farm out in the middle of nowhere, with my aunt in her condo, with my dad and our cousins in Texas, or with my other grandparents (my stepfather's parents) at their retirement community...you know, just a smallish group of people, not the huge throngs that tend to come with full-blown family reunions. Many of the people who come are people I don't even know or remember very well, but I guess that's the point of having family reunions in the first place. I think the last family reunion I attended was held by someone who lived not far from my maternal grandparents....I was told privately that no one really liked the hostess very much (and she didn't really like anybody either) and few people showed up to the event at all. I didn't have to spend much time talking with her directly though (there were these really cool old photo albums and high school yearbooks to look through, lots of food, a dog or two to interact with), but I think she ended up kinda liking me by the time it was over (probably because I thanked her for the food several times and was happy to move or fetch any items that needed moving or fetching without complaint). It wouldn't have been logical at all for me to have approached the occasion not liking her (the way my mom and aunt told me that people already didn't like her) since I don't think I'd ever met or spent any time with her prior to the reunion itself. I thought it was kind of sad that most people didn't like her much, even though she'd gone to the trouble of organizing a family reunion, and can't say I blame her for the feeling being mutual.

 

[Sofi]

I would not go to a school or family reunion. I can't think of anything much worse for me. the awkward socializing!!
I don't really have anyone to reunite with anyway!

 

[Cinnamon115]

As I only graduated high school a couple of years ago, I haven't had a high school reunion yet. But every august we always have a family reunion at my grandma's lake house. I always enjoy going to them because I hardly ever get to see my cousins because they are all so busy with sports. It's also the only time I get to see my aunt from Wyoming, because she has such a busy job that it's the only time of the year she can fly out and visit us.

 

[danielcollins]

I don't like the stigma there is associated with reunions of any kind, it's like there's an atmosphere of "everyone must get on now we're adults" but we're all fundamentally different people who so happened to go to the same school. There are people in life who I don't get on with and I'm totally okay at not interacting with them.

I made few friends at school, it was a bad time for me and It's not something I'd really like to bring back up again. There's a few that's reached out to me that bullied me at school and I've not forgotten what they did to me - nor will I ever. Maybe that's a bit childish but I probably won't let that go, ever.

We've had family reunions in the past but the sheer volume of people is a bit daunting. Things like eye contact start making me really awkward, where do I look etc and the pressure it not something I enjoy so I usually go and sit inside away from the fuss.

Although with my friends, not an issue.. maybe because we connect on likeness where family is just blood ties. But there has been times where I've had a few friends from various different circles in the same place and it's been really really awkward because they don't get on or see eye to eye. So that's not much better.

 

[ancusmitis]

I met a fellow student from one of my highschools a few months ago, and he told me about "our" reunion coming up. It hadn't even occurred to me to check whether it was happening, let alone attend. I didn't meet anyone in highschool that I currently want to be friends with. Except maybe for some people in another state, only I stayed in touch with a few of them over the internet for a little while, but that faded away. So there's really nothing to take me back to highschool.