I try to take a practical approach in this kind of situation. I've grown over many years to accept that I can't offer an immediate solution, so what I do is help my partner's emotional state become more real to me, even when protecting myself a bit. I offer myself as a mirror by which they can get a sense of their own dimensionality. So I ask questions about their sense of self and what they imagine the consequences of their feelings, to mirror and draw out those feelings and also acknowledge their validity. I'm trying to see how they make these feelings concrete within their lives - not just a repressed theme - and never immediately offer solutions. They have to own the solution if they are to act on it, and that takes time. Something invented in me can't be transferred to them. Empathy risks becoming just sentimentalising a person, thinking of them only in terms of their crises, creating a passive image of them, as opposed to engaging (with) their intentionality. So I try to find ways to make them real to me and leave them feeling seen. But I also have to look after myself within that, because it can be a bit overwhelming. We must be cautious of being therapists in our own relationships, and it takes courage and doggedness to try at all, from both sides.