Peter Jansen
Veteran Aspie
I am common-uncommon-- this is what I proclaim myself to be. I am thoroughly engaged in self-study. Knowing your worth is best consequence of self-study, but true self-knowledge doesn't come easy. At age 40 I know myself well enough to say my life is a statistical anomaly wrapped up in mundanity. There are so many ways to show the world you do not conform to its expectations, so many outlandish modes of dress, lifestyle, body-modification, behaviour, etc. And yet for a guy like me, traditional straightlaced conservatism is the default mode. So boring! So quaint! "You belong in a museum!" they'll say. Yet no matter how my private opinion of myself fluctuates, I'll always have the satisfaction of knowing I'm much more complex than I seem. I am a like Chinese puzzle box working out its own exquisite internal geometry. When I begin to unfold, the treasures hidden inside reveal their great luster. The state of being fully unfolded is for me the ultimate expression of personal development. But what is the point of enriching my internal landscape if it is to be kept from the world? The puzzle box becomes the most ornately decorated coffin you could imagine!