Alcoholic Family vs Autism

[GhostWriter]

Think I've tried to start this type of thread before, but I am new to AC & have problems navigating the site- please excuse if this is repetitious!

To Begin-
I discovered AC awhile ago during a preliminary period of Depression, which recently caused a Meltdown, leading to an 'attempt to harm myself' & a 7 day stay in hospital.
When I was first depressed it was triggered by a controversial conversation I had with a relative, who took offense at how/ what I said & then my spouse saying I ALWAYS said the wrong thing. This reminded me of the TV series, Doc Martin, & the discussion about whether he was an Aspie or not. This lead me to investigate the Autism spectrum, & the characteristics sounded A LOT like me, even back as far as kindergarten! (I am 67)
However, in hospital I was 'diagnosed' with ACA- Adult Children of Alcoholics (syndrome) because of what seemed to me to be some of the SAME SYMPTOMS!!
My question here is, has anyone else heard of this ACA bit/ had a similar experience? Know the symptoms supposedly indicating ACA?? Some of them are:
-Inability to accept criticism
-A tendency to try to control situations
-A love of routines
-Difficulty in expressing/ defending oneself
-a fear of authority
Etc...
I would ho on to explain more about the similarities & differences I have with this Idea, but first I need to know if anyone Else has any thoughts, info, experience with the controversy.
Thanks for your Feedback!!

 

[Ste11aeres]

Sometimes different things can share some of the same symptoms.
Assuming that your parents were Alcoholics, that background of yours would be the obvious reason that someone would evaluate your symptoms as being caused by ACA.
It is always possible that you are Aspie and ACA. My mother might be both.

Inability to accept criticism is more of a human trait than an Aspie one. (Everybody hates being criticised. Some people are just better at others at gritting their teeth and hiding how much they hate it).
Fear of authority is not a specifically Aspie trait, and probably does have more to do with one's background and past experiences with authority figures. That trait might belong more to ACA than to aspergers/autism.
Love of routine has more to do with aspergers/autism than with ACA.
Difficulty expressing/defending oneself is common among Aspies. Maybe it can also be exacerbated by something like ACA. A tendency to try to control situations can belong both to autism spectrum and to ACA, and can also be the result of other things.

Anyway, it's possible to have both autism spectrum and ACA.

 

[GhostWriter]

Sometimes different things can share some of the same symptoms.
Assuming that your parents were Alcoholics, that background of yours would be the obvious reason that someone would evaluate your symptoms as being caused by ACA.
It is always possible that you are Aspie and ACA. My mother might be both.

Inability to accept criticism is more of a human trait than an Aspie one. (Everybody hates being criticised. Some people are just better at others at gritting their teeth and hiding how much they hate it).
Fear of authority is not a specifically Aspie trait, and probably does have more to do with one's background and past experiences with authority figures. That trait might belong more to ACA than to aspergers/autism.
Love of routine has more to do with aspergers/autism than with ACA.
Difficulty expressing/defending oneself is common among Aspies. Maybe it can also be exacerbated by something like ACA. A tendency to try to control situations can belong both to autism spectrum and to ACA, and can also be the result of other things.

Anyway, it's possible to have both autism spectrum and ACA.

My parents were not alcoholics, but my father's father was. My Dad was a super controlling, critical, manipulative man who left a very Large impact on me, their firstborn.... A lot of my personality 'quirks'
are probably learned responses for dealing with my Dad as his were for dealing with His Dad. Whether this is ACA or Aspies or a bit of both, I don't know, but it surevis hard to deal with. My spouse's family in particular will not accept that there might be another factor, besides my being an out & out alcoholic!! Even though I have had social problems since kinder garten!!
This makes me very angry & triggers my 'Flight' response Big Time. Then when I retreat they criticize that behavior as well! And that doesn't do much for my self esteem- it's like Dominoes, one tips into another & so on....

 

[wyverary]

It could easily be a mix of both autism and ACA, though you haven't provided many details as to the ASD aspects. As for the ACA, there are plenty of support groups out there (some 12-step, some more informal) that you could try. I know a couple of people in such programs and they find them extremely helpful.

 

[epath13]

Think I've tried to start this type of thread before, but I am new to AC & have problems navigating the site- please excuse if this is repetitious!

To Begin-
I discovered AC awhile ago during a preliminary period of Depression, which recently caused a Meltdown, leading to an 'attempt to harm myself' & a 7 day stay in hospital.
When I was first depressed it was triggered by a controversial conversation I had with a relative, who took offense at how/ what I said & then my spouse saying I ALWAYS said the wrong thing. This reminded me of the TV series, Doc Martin, & the discussion about whether he was an Aspie or not. This lead me to investigate the Autism spectrum, & the characteristics sounded A LOT like me, even back as far as kindergarten! (I am 67)
However, in hospital I was 'diagnosed' with ACA- Adult Children of Alcoholics (syndrome) because of what seemed to me to be some of the SAME SYMPTOMS!!
My question here is, has anyone else heard of this ACA bit/ had a similar experience? Know the symptoms supposedly indicating ACA?? Some of them are:
-Inability to accept criticism
-A tendency to try to control situations
-A love of routines
-Difficulty in expressing/ defending oneself
-a fear of authority
Etc...
I would ho on to explain more about the similarities & differences I have with this Idea, but first I need to know if anyone Else has any thoughts, info, experience with the controversy.
Thanks for your Feedback!!

I've never met a person who was officially diagnosed with ACA. I've definitely met a lot of kids with Alcoholic parents but I don't know if they've been diagnosed. What I'm saying is that I can't judge whether the symptoms are similar or not, but there're some things about Autism or AS that separates it from other disorders. One of the most important symptoms is social difficulties but there's one detail that some specialists may take notice of - misunderstanding how to socialize, natural socialization may seem hard to comprehend for people on the spectrum. Some manage to learn how to socialize but it may never feel natural. People on the spectrum perceive communication differently. Another thing that seem to be very important, let's say, to receive a diagnosis - presence of repetitive behaviours, especially unusual ones like rocking or flapping etc.

There's a difference why people with Autism may not like criticism, it is again related to communication challenges a person faces. Especially for kids with Autism, the world is their world, they understand it the way they decide to understand it and they may refuse to change that picture.

Change in general is also hard but it is because of processing differences. Some information may be processed slower than other, that's why any change may be very stressful, unless it's expected or wished for change. I'm going to tell you how I felt. When something changed I would feel like the whole world was falling apart and I needed to reorganize it again. It's like if I put a huge puzzle together, but then somebody came and broke it and I would have to put it all over again while being still exhausted from building the previous one.
Those are the main things you should be paying attention to.
I've said it dozens of times and I'm going to say it again Autism is a neurological and processing disorder, it makes you process information differently. Trauma of any kind may make you process information in a different way but, I believe, there's a difference, and a specialist with extensive knowledge about and experience with Autism should be able to recognize those differences. Hope this helps one more thing, I think it would be very important for you to remember (or ask somebody who knew you) early childhood behavior before age 4 hopefully. Maybe you can pinpoint some early typical symptoms that could lead you in the right direction.

 

[GhostWriter]

Since I was the Oldest child in my family it would be hard to find someone who remembers me when I was 4. I myself remember the house we lived in, the neighbors next door, the goats I got tangled up with one day, the 'striped kitty' I carried home that turned out to be a Skunk, having braces on my legs/ feet due to being born with club feet, etc. All I remember about emotions back then are feeling isolated, not 'included', shy or scared & having a rather 'contrary' attitude towards socially accepted standards- for a 4 year old! I also remember my Dad taking me fishing &/falling out of the boat when I thought he was going to let the boat (with me in it) drift away while he was trying to moor it to a tree on shore. Scariest memory was hearing Dad talk about an empty parked car that rolled downhill onto the highway- I still have nightmares about not being able to reach the brakes, etc!!

 

[epath13]

Since I was the Oldest child in my family it would be hard to find someone who remembers me when I was 4. I myself remember the house we lived in, the neighbors next door, the goats I got tangled up with one day, the 'striped kitty' I carried home that turned out to be a Skunk, having braces on my legs/ feet due to being born with club feet, etc. All I remember about emotions back then are feeling isolated, not 'included', shy or scared & having a rather 'contrary' attitude towards socially accepted standards- for a 4 year old! I also remember my Dad taking me fishing &/falling out of the boat when I thought he was going to let the boat (with me in it) drift away while he was trying to moor it to a tree on shore. Scariest memory was hearing Dad talk about an empty parked car that rolled downhill onto the highway- I still have nightmares about not being able to reach the brakes, etc!!

I guess everybody is different, and every child on the spectrum would process things differently. In any case, those early memories could help a potential specialist to figure out whether it's Asperger's or not. For me it was easy I remember myself since before 1, and after 2 I remember myself really well: what I thought, what I felt. I remember thinking that I lacked some feelings I was supposed to have, and some feelings were sort of disconnected from me. I also remember being confused about other people communication. I didn't understand what they're doing when they played or talked to each other. I had speech processing issues, some words seemed scrambled and sounded like gibberish. I also was developing compassion, or I'd rather say - connecting to the feeling of compassion, by analyzing it. The way I played, for quite some time, was having one pile of toys on one side of the table, then I would touch a toy, look at it and put it on the other side of the table, I could do it all day. I had to be taught how to play, to be fair, I was reasonably quick learner. Those are just a few things. Maybe you can relate to some of it...