A moan - feeling depressed.

[Roxy]

I need somewhere to moan/offload, and someone who understands I guess.

I'm tired of struggling with... life I just want to be able to get through a day without finding things hard. I know I'm depressed right now and that clouds my thoughts but it's being the way I am and struggling with being me that makes me depressed.

I'm 47. I've hidden my 'problems' for 46 1/2 years. I'm good at that, hiding it. I'm not good at explaining it or living with it. I feel stupid telling my husband of 30 years that the reason I'm in a state is because I couldn't do what I usually do at that time every week, or that I'm snappy because my timetable at work is different today, or that I'm anxious because I've got to face a group of people I don't know or I'm irritable because my clothes feel uncomfortable, or I can't eat my food because there's a piece of sweetcorn that's crept in with my peas, or I'm being picky because he hasn't buttered the bread the right way, or I'm sad because I'm fed up with being me.

If I had a magic wand I'd wave it and make my husband psychic, so he'd know what's wrong without me having to explain it, and he'd be able to talk me through it and support me without me feeling stupid for feeling the way I do. But there is no magic wand There's just me and AS

 

[BruceCM]

If there was a 'magic wand', I'd wave it to solve ALL the world's problems! Any use saying I sympathize?

 

[royinpink]

I'm good at that, hiding it. I'm not good at explaining it or living with it.

Definitely relate to this. It's hard having to explain when you're struggling yourself, but it does pay off. Hang in there.

 

[geO]

My escaping the BS of life and depression is getting on my bicycle. For me this cleanses my mind.
I also go here and follow along http://www.militaryonesource.mil/12038/MOS/Audio/Chill_Drills/2_Chill_Drill.mp3