22 Things a Woman Must Know: If She Loves a Man With Asperger's Syndrome 2014-12-27

[Vanilla]

Vanilla submitted a new resource:

22 Things a Woman Must Know: If She Loves a Man With Asperger's Syndrome - Rudy Simone covers 22 common areas of confusion for someone dating a male with Aspergers Syndrome

Although having Asperger Syndrome (AS) can make romantic relations difficult, having a fulfilling relationship with an Asperger man is certainly not impossible. A woman in love with a man with AS may interpret his difficulties with communication and socialization as a lack of interest in the relationship. He may vacillate between being gentle and caring to seeming cold and distant. She may find his behaviour hard to understand, resulting in feelings of loneliness, isolation, and confusion. This...

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[Suzanne]

It is the other way around in my situation for this is much how my husband feels.

He got upset with me this morning because he was in the bathroom, finishing drying himself and I went in to talk with him and then, after we left and we went upstairs, so that he could get dressed, he suddenly said: she didn't even comment on the fact that her husband was naked and goes on to say, that it upset him, and made him feel that he might as well not have been there. What on earth could I say? I tried to explain that I was paying attention to what he was saying and honestly did not think to look at his body? The trouble is that I am not into "bodies" all that much. I mean: I like a bit of muscle on a man and can think: yummy, for I am not asexual, but I do not go gaga with the male figure. I did manage to say that there are times, I am naked in front of him and he does not see and yet, he finds it hard to look females in the eyes, if they have heaving bosoms, so shouldn't I feel upset that out of all the women in the world, he fails to notice his wife's assets some times? He reluctantly agreed.

He used to complain that I do not touch him a lot. I thought it was related to the child abuse, but wonder now, if it is to do with me being an aspie, because I have to think about touch. And yet, if someone is unhappy, I do put my hand on their arm etc, to show fellow feeling.

My husband is a very romantic type of man and I am the one who is not quite so romantic.

 

[Vanilla]

It is the other way around in my situation for this is much how my husband feels.

He got upset with me this morning because he was in the bathroom, finishing drying himself and I went in to talk with him and then, after we left and we went upstairs, so that he could get dressed, he suddenly said: she didn't even comment on the fact that her husband was naked and goes on to say, that it upset him, and made him feel that he might as well not have been there. What on earth could I say? I tried to explain that I was paying attention to what he was saying and honestly did not think to look at his body? The trouble is that I am not into "bodies" all that much. I mean: I like a bit of muscle on a man and can think: yummy, for I am not asexual, but I do not go gaga with the male figure. I did manage to say that there are times, I am naked in front of him and he does not see and yet, he finds it hard to look females in the eyes, if they have heaving bosoms, so shouldn't I feel upset that out of all the women in the world, he fails to notice his wife's assets some times? He reluctantly agreed.

He used to complain that I do not touch him a lot. I thought it was related to the child abuse, but wonder now, if it is to do with me being an aspie, because I have to think about touch. And yet, if someone is unhappy, I do put my hand on their arm etc, to show fellow feeling.

My husband is a very romantic type of man and I am the one who is not quite so romantic.

This is probably more suited to your situation then:
22 Things a Woman With Asperger's Syndrome Wants Her Partner to Know | AspiesCentral.com

 

[ChoctawFighter]

I've read part of that book in my visits to Barne's and Noble. Very insightful and helpful, especially when attempting to remember things that my Aspie fiancé does that I also do. Lol

 

[Keigan]

This is a very straight forward description of life with an aspie man though from a constraint and Females emotional/empathic needs not being met. The author would find many of the same challenges in a relationship with a non-aspie man.


Obviously not all of the traits are applicable to every aspie man.