My sleep has improved because I am only back on Seroquel. It hasn't helped much with my anger or depression because women won't stop ostracizing me in social places where leaders of the groups say to talk to "everyone".
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Tony Ramirez
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People that ostracize you, ostracize there snobbish asses back.
After talking to my only friend I am officially part of one church the one I was supposed to be in.
Just like that snobbish cafe.
This was at the new church I am trying in the morning week 3 not one person talked to me. I nearly passed out being ostracized and no one gave a damn.
I freaking hate Park Slope with all these damn snobs I wish they would all go to hell they ostracized my ass all the damn time.
I knew it was to good to be true. My life still sucks. The past few days were all a facade.
Another toxic dump is purged from my daily visits before it was turning me into an antisocial narcissist.
Black and white thinking nearly ruined the day again. After service I felt ostracized again then approached a women from game night who I thought ignored me. We had a 20 minute conversation. I felt better.
I'm at church now. I have a headache my body hurts and I feel like I am actually going to pass out. Yes I was greeted but now I am ignored ostracized. My body physically hurts.
I'm heading to Dunkin Donuts.
Every time I try to sit and watch one of the original Star Wars trilogy movie at the café damn platonic friends and couples keep coming in then I get depressed, and I have to put on 80's breakup songs, sad lo-fi or ambient music then eventually get the hell out of there. I try to watch it at home, but then my PITA parents call and text me all the time, interrupting me.
I know recording and taking pictures of women without their consent is wrong but the way new women treated me like I had the plaque this week it did not matter how attractive dresses or otherwise I did not care to even save their voice or image being treated like chop liver garbage all week.
I had more social interaction with women positive and made more friends with them in 2020 during the pandemic then the ungrateful snobs who ostracize me now in 2024.
Damn blues reds and whites are popping bright today because of the couples. It's like it's freaking Valentine's Day today.
Places I use to call second homes are now dumps to me.
How I feel right now, seeing four platonic couples behind me.
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