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  • It's my middle son's birthday today. He's 28. But he's not talking to me on account of he's angry for his dad and that I left his narcy arse 14 years ago. I didn't try to contact him coz he rejects me everytime still. Sad. I miss him. Wish my autistic mind could figure out what to do about it.
    Saw my therapist today, with a lift in with my support worker. They are helping me help my youngest son access some supports. Also spoke to my brother. He sounds pretty well. He has had a very uphill battle too but is getting there healthwise. We spoke about the possibility of our mum being Autistic and agreed it's very likely but that she's unlikely to be open to the fact as yet.
    Hard day. Mixed blessings. Did a social thing that fell flat. Overshared and the reaction caused extreme awkwardness and I ran away. I did have some lovely connections as well, though before and after that. Lots of tears today. Lawnmowers sending me over the edge. I need noice cancelling headphones! I was brave though, I went into the village which is very hard for me and creates much overwhelm& vulnerability
    Just got home from a day out with my support worker. Had brunch and went and did a free yoga class together. Awesome day! I really like her.
    I am researching supports that I will be eligible when my support plan gets approved. It's making me teary, as life has been such an uphill battle with 7 (probably all) neurodivergent kid's, some with high needs ASD and comorb mental illnesses. I'm so chronically over exhausted, and being ASD2 my needs have been so overlooked and my burn out has been progressively more debilitating as time goes on. I need this.
    I just got diagnosed with ASD2. Still processing that. At least now I should be able to access the supports I've always needed.
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