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Metalhead

Metalhead

V.I.P Member
Metal health will drive you mad! 47 From Bedlam
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  • Metalhead
    I really do have a lot to be grateful for. I have a handful of very close friends. I have my own little castle that I can afford. My mental and physical health is a work in progress. Doctor thinks I may be bipolar type 2 on top of being an Aspie, but I’d rather not be one of those who uses a diagnosis as an excuse for bad behavior.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Some of my closest friends are bipolar. And one is definitely an Aspie.
    Metalhead
    I feel like I want to make enchiladas in mole sauce for myself tonight. Then going to the gym to burn them off tomorrow.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Sounds so much better then my dinner. But the gym is a great plan, when the enchiladas call.....
    Metalhead
    I want to help be a building block in the lives of others. I want to be an essential stable rock. I want to help others away from liquor. My friends need me. My boss needs me. I am not the bother I was raised to believe I was. My false beliefs have held me back too long.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    So right! The lies that we have internalized are the greatest harm to us. I have struggled as you have to repair myself.
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    Metalhead
    It is amazing how much money some people have. Some of those college girls were getting plastered on expensive cocktails. I suppose some people can’t enjoy a concert without being drunk, and that is very sad.
    Metalhead
    4517B751-05B2-4A61-BC90-97CFDE0F1E68.webp
    View previous comments…
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Sometimes helping others pulls us out, because you have talk the talk, and walk the talk, addicts know when you are lying. Lol
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Just take journey slowly. You have come far. Take a minute to congratulate yourself. Those raw feelings come back, and before we try to numb them. It's best now to identify those raw feelings. I know it sounds corny, but you need to embrace these feelings, and own them. This starts your journey. The quicker you get at checking in with how you feel, you will be able to regulate better.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    I have walked this path over the last 6 months. Start identifying and labeling what you are feeling, and why.
    Metalhead
    I am at a venue where the concert ticket cost me $22.50 but cocktails cost $17. Another reason not to have a drink.
    Aspychata
    Hope you are doing better today. I notice Friday you end up in your funk. It seems around weekends. Please do self-care. Try not to spiral okay?
    Metalhead
    I am now convinced that Uber hates their customer base.
    Princess Viola
    Princess Viola
    My card got banned from Uber (well Uber Eats) a few years ago and I 100% bet if I were to contact their customer service right now, they'd still insist that there's no ban on the card from their end, so it must be my bank blocking it (and I have called my credit union and there's no block on their end)

    Doesn't stop them from constantly sending me emails asking me to come back to Uber Eats though.
    Luca
    Luca
    I don’t have anything nice to say about Uber, I’m kind of terrified of rideshare services and taxis, but the few times I used Uber I either had drivers that were shady, or talked my ear off. I had one nice one. It also made me uncomfortable that they were always men because I was usually by myself and drunk.
    Metalhead
    Going to a concert tomorrow night in downtown Tacoma. Forget Uber, I will be taking Lyft home instead. I plan an a nice sober evening out.
    Metalhead
    I just completed a back and forth email with Uber, and they keep on referring me to their terms and services page instead of giving me a straight answer as to why my account is locked. As far as I can tell, I violated none of those terms. All I did with them was try to make a single order on Uber Eats. Their refusal to tell me why my account is locked says a lot about them:
    View previous comments…
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Sounds annoying. I think the email exchanges are typically with robots that try to sound like people, but they are not real people.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    ^ no offense to robots, because robots are cool. I guess they’re probably bots, not robots.
    Metalhead
    Metalhead
    Of course, I doubt I am talking to actual human beings on the other end. They also do not have a customer service phone line by design. They have a phone line for drivers but nothing for customers. This is the most anti-customer business I have ever encountered.
    Metalhead
    I seriously need some help.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    You can pm me. Do you have a therapist to call tomorrow?
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    You can get it. Keep trying. Knowing you need help is a huge hurdle, getting it is simply one small step at a time away from the despair you are feeling right now.
    Markness
    Markness
    I hope you can get it.
    Metalhead
    Nothing is pleasurable for me anymore.
    Luca
    Luca
    It's okay to ask for help. A lot of us want to help you.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    I understand. I think many of us understand. We are here to be your cheerleaders.
    Kisa the tea
    Kisa the tea
    Bunny cheerleader ready and waiting to support and listen to you!

    NwHKS62Jt2JWnolnRyaVmMZD0jQouAHdtOHApajdAJ8.jpg
    Metalhead
    Looking at the abyss can feel so comforting sometimes.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Looking at it and considering it is, indeed, comforting. But falling into it is not. Don’t get too close to it.
    Metalhead
    20 years ago I was living my dream life. Expenses were less back then, and I could live off SSDI and focus all of my time on my film criticism website. And I was weak enough to let my family bully me into shutting it down. I am a joke, and the punchline sucks.
    Metalhead
    Things hurt a lot more without intoxicants in my system. I am abstaining, but I feel like throwing in the towel.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    I am abstaining
    Click to expand...

    This is the key to your message. Abstaining during the happy times is easy enough, but it is now, when things are difficult, that abstaining is the most important thing.
    Metalhead
    I am little more than a bother. My neediness is inexcusable. My place is here, in my house, alone. I complained long enough. Complaining is all I can do right.
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