I realized something beautiful today. A human being paid me a kindness with no expectation of reciprocity.
A $50,000 prototype of a medical device, one of only five in existence, is sitting on my bed next to me. This device used ultrasonic waves to allow the body to actually grow cartilage; it's very possibly the cure for arthritis.
The owner of the company I work for, a medical device manufacturer, lent me this device at the behest of my boss. An old back injury had flared up (a bulging disc in my spine), and it had me in so much pain that I couldn't walk or stand without a cane. I couldn't tie my shoes. I'd roll over in my sleep and the agony would wake me up several times a night.
But this isn't about me or my pain, so let me just cut to the chase: I used the device, and now I could freaking tap dance and do back flips if I wanted to. The pain is like 90% gone; you have to use the device several times over the course of a few days to completely heal, and it dropped my jaw when they said I could take the prototype home with me to use over the weekend.
Usually, when people do kind things for each other like loaning them the prototype of a not-yet-available medical device, they're expecting something in return. I don't have a problem with that, not at all - in fact, if kindness works as a barter system, as a sort of economy, I hope that economy booms.
So when someone does something kind for me, it's such an automatic thing to figure out what it is they want in return, sort of like a zero-sum game, just so I know what the score is, and if I'm making out about even vis-a-vis value of kindness exchanged.
For the past several hours that I've possessed this device, I had been operating under the assumption that it was because they wanted my feedback - that I was a guinea pig of sorts. I'm cool with that; my back gets better, they get valuable feedback, everybody wins. But then it occurred to me, something beautiful:
Me taking this device home is not a controlled clinical trial. My feedback is not valuable to them in any way, shape, or form. They lent me this device so my back could get better. I was working, hurt back or not, so it's not the productivity they seek to gain. I can't discern any reason that they would lend me this prototype; or, at least, they don't stand to gain anything of commensurate value.
When I took the device off and stood up from my chair without using my cane, my boss gasped and just about cried she was so happy. She came over and, with my permission, gave me a big ol bear hug. The cynical side of me thinks people who act like that are just faking it, but no - the sum of what I've experienced today tells me that I have been granted one of the most precious gifts a human being can receive:
The gift of kindness without expectation of reciprocity.
I feel so loved. So happy. I'm laughing like an idiot for no good reason, I'm just that happy. Because I'm unsure about the non-disclosure regarding this product, I can't say any more about it than I already have, but I want to thank the company I work for, the owner, my boss, the engineers who made this device, and especially the Qatari prince whose funding made this possible. May you get even more relief than I did from this wonderful device, and may you live a long life, free of pain.
A $50,000 prototype of a medical device, one of only five in existence, is sitting on my bed next to me. This device used ultrasonic waves to allow the body to actually grow cartilage; it's very possibly the cure for arthritis.
The owner of the company I work for, a medical device manufacturer, lent me this device at the behest of my boss. An old back injury had flared up (a bulging disc in my spine), and it had me in so much pain that I couldn't walk or stand without a cane. I couldn't tie my shoes. I'd roll over in my sleep and the agony would wake me up several times a night.
But this isn't about me or my pain, so let me just cut to the chase: I used the device, and now I could freaking tap dance and do back flips if I wanted to. The pain is like 90% gone; you have to use the device several times over the course of a few days to completely heal, and it dropped my jaw when they said I could take the prototype home with me to use over the weekend.
Usually, when people do kind things for each other like loaning them the prototype of a not-yet-available medical device, they're expecting something in return. I don't have a problem with that, not at all - in fact, if kindness works as a barter system, as a sort of economy, I hope that economy booms.
So when someone does something kind for me, it's such an automatic thing to figure out what it is they want in return, sort of like a zero-sum game, just so I know what the score is, and if I'm making out about even vis-a-vis value of kindness exchanged.
For the past several hours that I've possessed this device, I had been operating under the assumption that it was because they wanted my feedback - that I was a guinea pig of sorts. I'm cool with that; my back gets better, they get valuable feedback, everybody wins. But then it occurred to me, something beautiful:
Me taking this device home is not a controlled clinical trial. My feedback is not valuable to them in any way, shape, or form. They lent me this device so my back could get better. I was working, hurt back or not, so it's not the productivity they seek to gain. I can't discern any reason that they would lend me this prototype; or, at least, they don't stand to gain anything of commensurate value.
When I took the device off and stood up from my chair without using my cane, my boss gasped and just about cried she was so happy. She came over and, with my permission, gave me a big ol bear hug. The cynical side of me thinks people who act like that are just faking it, but no - the sum of what I've experienced today tells me that I have been granted one of the most precious gifts a human being can receive:
The gift of kindness without expectation of reciprocity.
I feel so loved. So happy. I'm laughing like an idiot for no good reason, I'm just that happy. Because I'm unsure about the non-disclosure regarding this product, I can't say any more about it than I already have, but I want to thank the company I work for, the owner, my boss, the engineers who made this device, and especially the Qatari prince whose funding made this possible. May you get even more relief than I did from this wonderful device, and may you live a long life, free of pain.
