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What to do in a bar or public places

H

Hummer

Well-Known Member
Any-one out there have some trick for know who to go say hello ... or invite for dinner

I'm the worse guy ever for that if not introduce by a freinds ... forget aboth me
 
Hi hummer, can you make it a little clearer. Are you with friends?
Are you trying to socialize with a stranger. If you could roughly sketch the situation, I might be able to give some tips :)
 
I meen in general , If I find some-one cute , or intresting , how to go see him , how to break the glass , how can I know he's interested in me
 
Visual contact --> small talk --> do some compliments that show slightly your intentions --> do an activity together like playing pool, singing, dancing, keep talking in another place, smoke even if you don't, and beyond this point just depends on your intentions.
 
Compliment him, ask if you can have a seat with him, talk a little about your surroundings, I don't know, but if the person is interested, he is paying attention and listening to you. Once you've started, and he's interested, things will go their way, trust me ;)
 
Start a tangent on cooking and foods you like, and once you find some common ground, talk about this great place you know, ask if they've been there, and if they'd like to go with you sometime.
 
Your tips , seams so logic , but for a reason I dont know it dont work , I get rejected or dont know how to interact . They find im strange or speak to mutch ... dont know where the problem is
 
Hummer said:
Your tips , seams so logic , but for a reason I dont know it dont work , I get rejected or dont know how to interact . They find im strange or speak to mutch ... dont know where the problem is
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I know what you mean, but you have to do it and see if it works out. Getting rejected isn't nice, but if you want to meet nice people you have to take this step :)
I too find this particularly hard, just don't think about it too much and it will be alright.
 
When I am in a bar, I like to people watch. I try to imagine I am an anthropologist observing an alien culture.
 
Initiate eye contact and smile. You can play a look-smile game for a while and see if they come over or go over yourself if they smile back.

You can send them a drink. Don't do this if you've already initiated contact, it would look desperate, also don't do it if they aren't alone. This is only good if they are alone and busy, not looking around. If you do this, ask the bartender what they're drinking. They'll probably come over and thank you for the drink. Have a line prepared for why you sent it. "I bet with my brother I'd buy a drink for the first guy wearing a blue shirt that I saw in the bar", if I did that I'd probably eventually tell them that I made it up, but I'd play around with it for a while. To say something silly is a good way for me to notice if they catch it or if they are just dull and a waste of time.

Ask them about themselves, most people like talking about themselves. You could also mention something news related, but it needs to be a light and positive topic, like there being a cure for cancer is good, there being a new ebola case is bad.
 
Thats one of my fun , I can see all what happening , sometime I play what are they saying game imaginatin totaly non logic and funny conversation
 
Hummer said:
I meen in general , If I find some-one cute , or intresting , how to go see him , how to break the glass , how can I know he's interested in me
Click to expand...
It's in the eyes. If his eye contact is a little more than three seconds , he's interested. Being an aspie, it's tricky, but go for it. Nothing too lose but your pride, which is no big deal nowadays.
 
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