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What all of this mean? My life in one thread ! Need answers ! Sorry!

  • Feeling constantly on guard or like danger is lurking around every corner=> I have that
  • Being jumpy or easily startled => I have that

    Im feeling weird atm..
 
post-traumatic stress disorder you are correct was originally thought of as a product of conflict and war !and was called shellshock !but something can be traumatic for instance if you were in a vehicle and it crashed you could be fearful that you are going to crash again -that's post-traumatic stress.
if you don't receive therapy -this is a known psychological fact your physical body starts to be affected! because you are worried your stomach produces acid if you don't receive therapy for a certain period of time then you can suffer irritable bowel syndrome !because you will have panic attacks and if you have too many panic attacks your digestive tract becomes controlled by your primal brain or your Second brain ,psychologists call your large and small intestine , kidneys ,liver ,colon -your second brain !obviously this brain does not have the advantage of hearing or eyesight so if it's damaged it takes a long time to heal .
One of the things that happens when you panic and you are being pursued by a predator is your brain stimulates your kidneys and your digestive tract to expel ( you urinate and you defecate ) whatever is in it.
The problem is if you become anxious for long periods of time and then become panicked and you are not being pursued by a predator- your digestive and urinary tract are going to become damaged -they are not designed for numerous periods of defecation and urination.
One of the side-effects of irritable bowel syndrome is you have a diarrhoea period and then a constipation period (a period is just an amount of time :say a few hours or a day or days).
you are obviously at the beginning of this process ( your words you are a bit anxious )but the problem is if you don't get therapy now in the years ahead this is what could happen to you .
then a lot of people start to self medicate (taking over-the-counter painkillers,alcohol ,illegal drugs)in whatever form they choose .
 
Ptsd?
Im not sure, like maybe im just a bit anxious and thats it, i mean ptsd is for people that did war no?

"Tell the therapist what you've done to compensate for your fear of assault ." I dont understand that part xD


Can you be more specific about the digestive and all pls?
if you see a group of young men what do you do to make yourself feel less fearful? - what you do to make yourself feel less fearful is in this context the word compensate .
 
Well today i dont know, because you know i am not trying to get out too much and so i didnt realy happen for a long time.

So i told you until like 18/20 i felt scared as hell, didnt manage to control it at all everytime i saw a group of hoodies i was scared , if i could change path it would, but most of the time i just walk a billion time slower and they pass and thats it...

Until i met that group of 15-16 that scared me as much but asked me a cigarette xD
Then i was less scared during day time, i am ok i think.

Ho know you mentions it, at night if i hear a group of people that i feel are hoddies I try to leave as fast as possible , I used to live near my best friend house(i didnt move but he did) and sometimes i just left his home at evening/night, and i always sprinted home.

And now that you mentions it...I got to admit that if i see a single guy looking like a hoodie or 2, i kinda of prepare my self , i mean getting in the mindset that i will fight ( i Also take my key and put it bewteen 2 fingers with my hand close in case)

You think this event got an impact on me?

After this , now that i think about it, my life changed after that, i played video games a billion time more, got into r rated sites, had a weird sleep patern, , less sleep overall , but the strong need to take a nape everywhere, i would even sleep in front of my homework papers, i grew a tendecie to sleep in classe also.

what issue can be related to ptsd in the everyday situation of a teenager?
Sweating at night/when learning?

Hight and drops of temperatures without exercice?
(growing interest for violence? like realistic one but also fantastic one?)

Pff this isnt real, i mean ptsd is for someone that went to war, well, how would you call a lesser degree ptsd? maybe it is something like that.
 
One of the side-effects of irritable bowel syndrome is you have a diarrhoea period and then a constipation period (a period is just an amount of time :say a few hours or a day or days).

Are you freaking serious this is my everday life for year come on i cant belive it...

Loop of diaereha and constipation, i always have it.

Man i need to double check that because , no offence , but it feel too easy like, i feel its a trap to belive it.
 
Well today i dont know, because you know i am not trying to get out too much and so i didnt realy happen for a long time.

So i told you until like 18/20 i felt scared as hell, didnt manage to control it at all everytime i saw a group of hoodies i was scared , if i could change path it would, but most of the time i just walk a billion time slower and they pass and thats it...

Until i met that group of 15-16 that scared me as much but asked me a cigarette xD
Then i was less scared during day time, i am ok i think.

Ho know you mentions it, at night if i hear a group of people that i feel are hoddies I try to leave as fast as possible , I used to live near my best friend house(i didnt move but he did) and sometimes i just left his home at evening/night, and i always sprinted home.

And now that you mentions it...I got to admit that if i see a single guy looking like a hoodie or 2, i kinda of prepare my self , i mean getting in the mindset that i will fight ( i Also take my key and put it bewteen 2 fingers with my hand close in case)

You think this event got an impact on me?

After this , now that i think about it, my life changed after that, i played video games a billion time more, got into r rated sites, had a weird sleep patern, , less sleep overall , but the strong need to take a nape everywhere, i would even sleep in front of my homework papers, i grew a tendecie to sleep in classe also.

what issue can be related to ptsd in the everyday situation of a teenager?
Sweating at night/when learning?

Hight and drops of temperatures without exercice?
(growing interest for violence? like realistic one but also fantastic one?)

Pff this isnt real, i mean ptsd is for someone that went to war, well, how would you call a lesser degree ptsd? maybe it is something like that.
this is why you need to see a therapist,I don't have enough practice to tell you exactly what you need to do ,they have a lot of practice ,I could hurt you because i'm anxious as well and I didn't get help,if you can avoid antidepressants do !autistic people don't seem to react to them as well as people who are neuro typical.
remember your English is much better than my French ,any French I learned is gone i've tried to memorise too much .
I tried cognitive behavioural therapy but I think autistic people need it for a long time and in the UK you don't get it for a long time .
 
About physical activity :

Do you run?
I had a weird feeling sometimes when i run, like, after a long run, especially when it on a treadmill , i tend to have the feeling that my body still want to do the excat same move, its weird to explain, but i feel like im still one this treadmill, it happens when i have to walk after running ( you know when im at the gym )

When i was teenager i had a run exam and the funny thing is that it was a "preparation" before exam, you know you do the same as the exam but its not the exam yet. I did great.

And then I just , on my way back to class, start running again with no reason, i wanted to be the first back in class, and ofc I provoked a muscle issue that i dont know the name but for weeks i was told to not run.




I dont run a lot.

Equilibrium issue?
When i was a kid i was sent to vacation camp and my favorite activit


Always something in your mind?I mean a thought /memory /music/daydream/intensive reflexion about a topic you just learn/heard of?

About physical pain: If what my body feels doesnt technically block me i go on with it.
I mean, maybe i am less resistant now im getting older, but

One day i played ninja in front of my mirror i was 10 and i used my parents butcher knives and I cut myself,i went to school and i even show the cut to one of my friend that said i was bad ass.
It was deep and bloody but it hide it and my mother realized it because 3 days after i just put all my bloody boxers to the waching machine like an idiot.

One day i had an accident at school and I had a class concil at the end of the day with my parents and so i didnt tell them, only at the end of the day we were going to the shop to buy me a video game because i did great and i just couldnt walk anymore so they decided to go to the hospital and i had a strain at my right ankle and even a lesser astragalus fracture.


One day I had a bike accident with my that broke 3 teeth and scrash my face very very badly, it was on my way to a football game with friends so i decided to go there anyway with my friends, people around were shocked about my face kek , and i didnt even wanted to find my teeth back its my old friend that got them back for me.

One day during vacation camp we had a sport olympic i mean numerous sport trial that we did in team you know , and as the age gap of all the kids werent not realy fair well i had one of the worst team not because they were bad just because they were too little compared to the other team , i felt i had the duty to compensate as much as i could , and i did so much effort that i basically put myself KO to the point of vomiting and not being able to move for 20min, we won because the last trial was less physical hehe.

In short when i was younger i tend to do physical activites to the point i just couldnt anymore .
And i think this is the reason why i was one of the best at running, because since i started to run at a younger age i could actually progress step by step , everytime breaking my limit further. Breaking it physically.

When i started working out i realized i could bring myself to KO with a specific position while doing some traction.
So i did it numerous time bringing my self to danger, because the game was to bring myself to the closest to KO but not being KO , just ultra mega numb and feeling trembling a lot. But one day I did it too much and I felt to the ground, i realy put myself in danger.


Most of the time i dont notice lesser cut also.


Tendencie to breath less that i should and everyday i kind of remember i have to breath more and it make me feel dizzy. So sport is usefull for me because it make me breath more.



Im afraid of speed. It depends but it vary to disconfort to being anxious, one day i was on a bike with someone and i just shout to him that this is wasnt normal and he just found me funny.
Not in car but when i feel the wind i think.

Also afraind of jumping, the moment when i feel the acceleration make me feel im dying. ( but i had an accident when i was a kid maybe this is related)

Also afraid when i am at the beach, i love swimming, but i just cant go to a place where i dont see /feel the bottom.

Pls note that when i mention friend in all y post its basically the same group again and again xD


Music can make me forget time and bring me to litte trance , i dont kow if its a trance but just like feeling the emotion of the music and its intensity and getting lost into it, but weirdly music helped me sleep when iw as younger as i just had to focus to this sound i knew to sleep.
 
Sorry, I look selfish because i mainly posted here and didnt look on other topics much...

But At the moment my head is a mess, im still a bit in denial and also a lot in stress because i am not sure of what will happen next...Apparently someone online pointed me toward a therapist and she contacted me, things will progress next month. She asked me to gather all my weird past experiences to help her make the fastest and best diagnosis possible.

SO SO SO SO..I dont look at other posts much, i will do it I promise, just gimme some time pls.

I realy appriciate the anwsers i got there, and it might have change my life so thanks a lot.
 

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