Very Restrictive Interests?

[Opia]

I understand how you feel. It'll be alright, you'll feel better in time Try to focus on your hobbies and try out new things. I've found that keeping plants around the house is very theraputic - caring for them and seeing them respond through growth, it's pretty rewarding.

 

[Maelstrom]

I garden allot and am trying to get a flock of Japanese Quail going...3 tries with eggs and just 2 male quail but I have 2 hatchers going if I can get just one female I''ll have eggs to finish tuning the hatcher temps and be in business.
Japanese quail eggs are twice as healthy as chicken eggs.

I like growing strange plants like Strawberry Guavas, dwarf figs and such things!
If I had my own green house it would be full of tropical fruits.
Are you a musician?

 

[Opia]

Eggs are healthy? I thought they were full of cholesterol, haha.
Anyway, that sounds neat Quail are pretty cute; I'd like to have some for pets. I've never heard of strawberry guavas, that's cool! Do they taste like strawberries?
Surprisingly, I'm not a musician, despite how much I love music. If I put my mind to it, I think I'd be a really good musician; it kinda suits my personality, lol. I took piano lessons for 3 years and then quit because I couldn't handle the recital anxiety (I was just a kid then). I regret quitting. If I could choose an instrument to learn now, it'd be the violin. Lindsey Stirling is really inspiring

 

[Ambi]

Hi guys,

For as long as I can remember, I've always put extreme restrictions on myself when it comes to interests. It's very strange. For instance, I go through phases of obsessing over each one of my interests, and while I'm obsessing over one thing, I can't allow myself to enjoy any of the other interests. I put pressure on myself to choose a favorite interest to focus on permanently because changing from one obsession to the next is emotionally draining and very stressful for me. I want to just settle on one interest and focus on it forever, but I just can't bring myself to choose one, and I'm simply unable to choose more than one. This is a very hard thing to explain, but is this common in people on the autism spectrum? Could it possibly be linked to OCD? I don't understand it, and it really bothers me.
Thanks in advance to anyone who reads/replies; any help is greatly appreciated.

I don't experience restrictions the same way that you mention - but I do place very heavy/strong restrictions on myself within my interests - they aren't rational, but I have this compulsion about it that is very hard to fight (if I even try). Like....if I am into a certain type of thing at a time, I will randomly get the idea that I must have at least 2 of each, or some other number, or some other type of "rule". Following these self-imposed "rules" (I don't even know where they come from) is just as compelling? compulsive? as the special interest/object of interest itself. It can be a bit crippling.

I don't feel that I musn't focus on other interest while engaged in one - but that is what happens naturally for me. On the contrary, I feel I *should* engage them all at once, but I simply can't - I neglect all others, I only focus on one at a time.

 

[Maelstrom]

Eggs are healthy? I thought they were full of cholesterol, haha.

Do they taste like strawberries?

Japanese quail eggs have twice the protean, twice the vitamins, and 1/2 the cholesterol.
I don't really eat meat so eggs help on protean to make me less hungry.
Strawberry Guavas taste the same but are smaller a purple red and grow on bushes instead of trees, you can grow them in pots. from Easter island I think?
..............

I don't feel that I musn't focus on other interest while engaged in one - but that is what happens naturally for me. On the contrary, I feel I *should* engage them all at once, but I simply can't - I neglect all others, I only focus on one at a time.

About the same for me many interests but I generally do one thing at a time, I am not too good at multi-tasking.

It hurts on dating as I focus too much on it when I should be doing other things.

 

[artfull dodger]

Yes, for me its an intense obsession with model trains, espically models of trains from Europe. I can go on and and on about trains to the point that I have run off most of my friends over the years. Mike

 

[Ambi]

About the same for me many interests but I generally do one thing at a time, I am not too good at multi-tasking.

It hurts on dating as I focus too much on it when I should be doing other things.

Yes - that's the problem for me, too. Well, here it is for me - I wish I could say that my intense focus on just one thing only lasted a couple of hours per day, and then i switched to something else. Nope. My focus on that one thing will be all-consuming for weeks or months at a time if an outside obstacle doesn't block it or break it up. And while I am consumed with that one thing, everything else is being neglected.

 

[Maelstrom]

Yes - that's the problem for me, too. Well, here it is for me - I wish I could say that my intense focus on just one thing only lasted a couple of hours per day, and then i switched to something else. Nope. My focus on that one thing will be all-consuming for weeks or months at a time if an outside obstacle doesn't block it or break it up. And while I am consumed with that one thing, everything else is being neglected.

Yes My Mom likes to do things in little bites...that drives me crazy, I do not want to weed the garden one row at a time, I want to weed the whole thing and then go work on something else.
If I don't finish it now I may never get back to it, I will get distracted and fall into another interest and it is lost forever.

 

[SchrodingersMeerkat]

Special interests have always been my strongest autistic trait.

 

[Idahocalypse]

Opia, I can definitely relate to a lot of your posts in this thread. I hate having multiple interests all competing for my time and attention. It causes me to get stressed out so I wind up having a love/hate relationship with them.

My current special interest is daydreaming about specific video game characters. Anime used to be my first and only love for many years, but I have been burned out on it for quite awhile. I feel torn between video game characters, which is my true love and passion, and anime, which I still wish I loved but the passion is gone.

I also do the "decorate my entire room with this interest and then take it all down when I'm done" thing too. I've had my room decorated in Pokemon for the past 8 months and I'm getting tired of it. But I'm reluctant to take it all down because it would just prove my dad right, because he predicted that it would all end up in the garage before my collection even started.

 

[Opia]

Opia, I can definitely relate to a lot of your posts in this thread. I hate having multiple interests all competing for my time and attention. It causes me to get stressed out so I wind up having a love/hate relationship with them.

My current special interest is daydreaming about specific video game characters. Anime used to be my first and only love for many years, but I have been burned out on it for quite awhile. I feel torn between video game characters, which is my true love and passion, and anime, which I still wish I loved but the passion is gone.

I also do the "decorate my entire room with this interest and then take it all down when I'm done" thing too. I've had my room decorated in Pokemon for the past 8 months and I'm getting tired of it. But I'm reluctant to take it all down because it would just prove my dad right, because he predicted that it would all end up in the garage before my collection even started.

I know, right? It's extremely stressful and exhausting.The longest I've ever stuck with a single interest was about 3-4 months, I guess. At the time, I'd thought that I'd finally settled on one, but of course it changed again. I think maybe if I wasn't so susceptible to depression, this problem wouldn't be so severe.
I feel the same about the bedroom thing as well - my sister and mom are always joking about it, and it sucks because I really am trying my hardest to stop being so indecisive. It kind of ruins gift-giving occasions like Christmas and birthdays when someone gets you a present based on what you were obsessed with a month ago, and you're no longer into it. It makes me feel terrible.
Also, did you draw your avatar? I really like it!
And yours too, @ShrodingersMeerkat

 

[Maelstrom]

Hmmm...5 years on my last one sub-atomics... Finished unraveling the entire universe on that one...it was easy!

likely the same on Building a personal Sailboat 5 years...

10 years on painting...

5 years on chainsaw carvings...

maybe 5 years on the perfect survival garden farm...

Struggling with guitar song writing...now
Am a little weaker in the music area!

many years on the perfect government a waste of time it was?
3 years on finding the true nature and origin of God

still like writing fiction...many many years on that one!

some of these done at the same time!
I am running out of big things to unravel in the world

Courting aspie lady is my last great effort I am losing on this one!
I am unsavant on people things!

Pleasing people is very hard!

 

[Idahocalypse]

I know, right? It's extremely stressful and exhausting.The longest I've ever stuck with a single interest was about 3-4 months, I guess. At the time, I'd thought that I'd finally settled on one, but of course it changed again. I think maybe if I wasn't so susceptible to depression, this problem wouldn't be so severe.
I feel the same about the bedroom thing as well - my sister and mom are always joking about it, and it sucks because I really am trying my hardest to stop being so indecisive. It kind of ruins gift-giving occasions like Christmas and birthdays when someone gets you a present based on what you were obsessed with a month ago, and you're no longer into it. It makes me feel terrible.
Also, did you draw your avatar? I really like it!
And yours too, @ShrodingersMeerkat

Wouldn't it be nice if we could consciously choose our interests instead of being at the mercy of whatever our brains feel like latching onto? For me personally, I've seen so many neat fictional characters that I wish I could be passionate about, but my brain always goes "Nope, we're obsessing over this character instead!" It's frustrating to me because I wish I could be a fanfiction author, but the characters I want to write about are different from the characters I'm passionate about. And in my experience as an amateur writer/artist, inspiration is only born out of passion.

I know how you feel about people making jokes about changing interests. My brother jokingly referred to the garage as "The Plush Toy Graveyard" because I have gone through so many different phases of collecting various types of plush toys - yet another reason why I'm reluctant to take down my Pokemon collection.

And it's always really difficult for me to decide what to get for my birthday/Christmas, because the fictional characters I'm passionate about tend to have little to no merchandise related to them, so I have to settle for things that I'm only somewhat interested in. It makes my birthday/Christmas kind of less memorable.

As for my avatar, I didn't draw it - it's actually official artwork of a character named Charlie as she appears in the video game Don't Starve Together. Charlie is one of those random fictional characters that my brain has latched onto.

 

[Opia]

Wouldn't it be nice if we could consciously choose our interests instead of being at the mercy of whatever our brains feel like latching onto? For me personally, I've seen so many neat fictional characters that I wish I could be passionate about, but my brain always goes "Nope, we're obsessing over this character instead!" It's frustrating to me because I wish I could be a fanfiction author, but the characters I want to write about are different from the characters I'm passionate about. And in my experience as an amateur writer/artist, inspiration is only born out of passion.

I know how you feel about people making jokes about changing interests. My brother jokingly referred to the garage as "The Plush Toy Graveyard" because I have gone through so many different phases of collecting various types of plush toys - yet another reason why I'm reluctant to take down my Pokemon collection.

And it's always really difficult for me to decide what to get for my birthday/Christmas, because the fictional characters I'm passionate about tend to have little to no merchandise related to them, so I have to settle for things that I'm only somewhat interested in. It makes my birthday/Christmas kind of less memorable.

As for my avatar, I didn't draw it - it's actually official artwork of a character named Charlie as she appears in the video game Don't Starve Together. Charlie is one of those random fictional characters that my brain has latched onto.

That would honestly be a dream come true. I relate so much to that, you have no idea. I've always loved to write, and I always wanted to write fanfiction as well, but my inspiration can't stay in one place long enough. The same goes for my original material - no inspiration, no content. It's sad, because I've been told I have so much potential in that area, and it's just going to waste.
The attic and basement are my current "plush/merch graveyards." My head hurts just thinking about all the money that's been spent on things that I don't want anymore. Ugh, so much guilt.
Anyway, that game looks interesting. I may just have to check it out. Maybe it'll be a new thing for me to obsess over for a month.

 

[Idahocalypse]

That would honestly be a dream come true. I relate so much to that, you have no idea. I've always loved to write, and I always wanted to write fanfiction as well, but my inspiration can't stay in one place long enough. The same goes for my original material - no inspiration, no content. It's sad, because I've been told I have so much potential in that area, and it's just going to waste.
The attic and basement are my current "plush/merch graveyards." My head hurts just thinking about all the money that's been spent on things that I don't want anymore. Ugh, so much guilt.
Anyway, that game looks interesting. I may just have to check it out. Maybe it'll be a new thing for me to obsess over for a month.

I'm really glad you could relate to my post! Whenever I try to tell non-autistic people about the fickle nature of special interests, they seem to have difficulty understanding what I'm talking about. That can be a frustrating thing. That's why I'm thankful for autism forums, where we can post about stuff like this and take comfort knowing that we're not alone in our experiences.

Anyway, a lot of people have praised my creative writing abilities in the past, and I won an award for a piece I wrote in elementary school, so I definitely understand how you feel about "wasting potential". Don't even get me started on the immense difficulty I have when trying to write original pieces! I remember taking a creative writing course in junior high and it was a nightmare. Basic concepts like "target demographics" were completely foreign to me ("Who do you want to read your work?" My answer was "As many people as possible.") Thankfully the teacher was very patient, lenient and kind towards me. He could probably tell I was autistic even though I didn't know I was at that point in my life.

And I totally understand feeling guilty for all the money that goes towards fleeting interests. There have been times where I've wasted so much money at once and I felt so guilty afterwards that I literally wanted to die! It's more manageable if I only spend my money in smaller chunks. But I shudder to think of all the money I've wasted in total!

It would be neat if Don't Starve became your next interest. The lore is pretty lacking but I'm in love with the art style and character designs. (Case in point: Charlie!)

 

[Opia]

I'm really glad you could relate to my post! Whenever I try to tell non-autistic people about the fickle nature of special interests, they seem to have difficulty understanding what I'm talking about. That can be a frustrating thing. That's why I'm thankful for autism forums, where we can post about stuff like this and take comfort knowing that we're not alone in our experiences.

Anyway, a lot of people have praised my creative writing abilities in the past, and I won an award for a piece I wrote in elementary school, so I definitely understand how you feel about "wasting potential". Don't even get me started on the immense difficulty I have when trying to write original pieces! I remember taking a creative writing course in junior high and it was a nightmare. Basic concepts like "target demographics" were completely foreign to me ("Who do you want to read your work?" My answer was "As many people as possible.") Thankfully the teacher was very patient, lenient and kind towards me. He could probably tell I was autistic even though I didn't know I was at that point in my life.

And I totally understand feeling guilty for all the money that goes towards fleeting interests. There have been times where I've wasted so much money at once and I felt so guilty afterwards that I literally wanted to die! It's more manageable if I only spend my money in smaller chunks. But I shudder to think of all the money I've wasted in total!

It would be neat if Don't Starve became your next interest. The lore is pretty lacking but I'm in love with the art style and character designs. (Case in point: Charlie!)

Yeah, it's always great to find someone who understands! It's rare for me as well; no one here really understands the struggle. I don't know what I'd do without forums like this one.
Congratulations on your award I never got to take a creative writing course, but I was very involved in roleplaying on different forums back in middle and high school, and all the extra practice I got from that made English courses a breeze, haha. It's good to have teachers like that - patience is so important.

Lately, I've been trying to find things to buy that are "interest-ambiguous" - my current favorite things to buy are crystals, because they're gorgeous and can go with pretty much any aesthetic. I also like to put fairy lights on everything And yeah, spending in smaller chunks is helpful too - I always try to find the best deals possible so I can save money. I used to tell myself, "It's okay to buy this (very interest-specific item)! You're so into this interest, how could you possibly change your mind later?" But thankfully, I'm finally starting not to trust myself so much, so I'm being more careful with my money.

I'm going to watch some videos about it soon; I really love the art style! And yes, Charlie is so adorable

 

[Jimbo]

Count me in. I am an all or nothing type person. If I have an interest I get extreme about it and hyperfocused so I can only handle about 2 interests, and that's NASCAR racing and Jesus,,,with a slight interest in fishing.

 

[Nightingale121]

I do sometimes focus more on one than the other then it will change and I will focus on the other interests but usually my interests evolve around the ones I mentioned,my husband does say to me though "I'm wondering what the next obsession will be next month"

For me the specific focus also changes frequently, but it usually evolves around interests I already have/had or some broader interest categories. This can be useful in a way regarding some areas since I gain knowledge of different areas within the category, but also annoying for myself if a specific interest requires more time, but then my focus suddenly changes and I haven't actually "finished" the former interest in a way before losing my focus again.

When it comes to the aspect of buying things related to my interests that was mentioned by @Opia and @LostInSilentHill, I don't usually invest much money in my interests at all since I know they change a lot. I don't allow myself to do it because don't think it's actually worth it, no matter if I feel like buying the stuff at a specific moment due to my current obsession.
It's like @Opia said:

Haha yeah, at the moment I'm in a state of hopelessness regarding this - there's really no point in buying anything related to my interest, since I'm so fickle. I hate it.

Instead of enjoying the purchase of something interest-related I rather overthink every buying decision and often end up not buying anything at all.
This could also be related to the fact that there is just too much available (though this obviously varies depending on the interest) and I couldn't buy all of it anyway and choosing is too hard and overwhelming.
So not buying anything is kind of sad since I don't own items related to my current interest, but also less overwhelming (no worries about what to choose) and it saves me money.
I tend to collect information rather than items instead, reading about my interests online, or watching videos and looking at pictures.

I don't feel that I musn't focus on other interest while engaged in one - but that is what happens naturally for me. On the contrary, I feel I *should* engage them all at once, but I simply can't - I neglect all others, I only focus on one at a time.

This is true for me as well.
I usually have some kind of mental list of potential interests, i. e. things I came across and found worth looking into etc. and there's usually a lot on it. But I just cannot do it that way, spending some time on each of these every day. I rather focus on one at a time for a while until my focus changes again. There might be some less important interests at the same time I might engage in occasionally, but there's always only one main focus.
I think this is partly caused by the fact that once I engage in a task I am very interested in I usually focus on it for quite some time on end and might even forget everything else around me during this, so without realizing I spend most of my free time engaged in this one interest-related thing, which then naturally prevents me to do other things in my free time because once I get out of the focus it's usually too late, i. e. there is no more free time left on that day because I need to go to bed or do other necessary tasks unrelated to any interests.