Hello all,
So this already feels strange to me to be on an Asperger's forum. I've hummed and hawed about whether I should create a profile as I am terrified of being an imposter. Here's a (hopefully short) synopsis of what lead me to here, literally typing right now.
I'm in school to become a health care provider. In a class focused on special needs, we were required to watch a video about autism. The opening lines of it were just uncanny, it was describing me. I've always been shy and awkward, but I've always just believed I was/am socially inept. As an example, I can remember at around age 6, my parents telling me they would no longer ask the waitress for a pen at restaurants, I'd have to ask myself. (I always wanted to draw on the napkin/play games etc). I've done a lot of work since my late teens in counseling, and have come a long way in learning how to make small talk, keep a conversation going, the fact that you need to reciprocate, etc etc. (I also record things others say that I think would be useful for me to say, and read through it from time to time for ideas). This helped me a lot in everyday function/fitting in. I actually have felt some resentment towards my parents for not 'teaching' me these things, but now I might be realizing most people don't have to be taught these things.
So needless to say I've been obsessively researching Asperger's/ASD for the last couple months. I haven't said anything to anyone yet, this is my first outward recognition of the possibility.
I have already been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder, for which I regularly see a psychiatrist. Years ago I was told I had a "little" borderline in me.
I guess I am at the point where now, I'd just like to know if I have Asperger's. I'm terrified to bring this up with my psychiatrist though, working in health care I'm really hesitant to self diagnose. I don't want to start taking on Asperger traits because the idea is there now. I also don't know if I should bring it up with my husband.
I'm joining here to hopefully gain more insight into whether this diagnosis fits me or not. Open to any/all thoughts, questions, counterpoints, anything really. Thanks for listening (reading).
So this already feels strange to me to be on an Asperger's forum. I've hummed and hawed about whether I should create a profile as I am terrified of being an imposter. Here's a (hopefully short) synopsis of what lead me to here, literally typing right now.
I'm in school to become a health care provider. In a class focused on special needs, we were required to watch a video about autism. The opening lines of it were just uncanny, it was describing me. I've always been shy and awkward, but I've always just believed I was/am socially inept. As an example, I can remember at around age 6, my parents telling me they would no longer ask the waitress for a pen at restaurants, I'd have to ask myself. (I always wanted to draw on the napkin/play games etc). I've done a lot of work since my late teens in counseling, and have come a long way in learning how to make small talk, keep a conversation going, the fact that you need to reciprocate, etc etc. (I also record things others say that I think would be useful for me to say, and read through it from time to time for ideas). This helped me a lot in everyday function/fitting in. I actually have felt some resentment towards my parents for not 'teaching' me these things, but now I might be realizing most people don't have to be taught these things.
So needless to say I've been obsessively researching Asperger's/ASD for the last couple months. I haven't said anything to anyone yet, this is my first outward recognition of the possibility.
I have already been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder, for which I regularly see a psychiatrist. Years ago I was told I had a "little" borderline in me.
I guess I am at the point where now, I'd just like to know if I have Asperger's. I'm terrified to bring this up with my psychiatrist though, working in health care I'm really hesitant to self diagnose. I don't want to start taking on Asperger traits because the idea is there now. I also don't know if I should bring it up with my husband.
I'm joining here to hopefully gain more insight into whether this diagnosis fits me or not. Open to any/all thoughts, questions, counterpoints, anything really. Thanks for listening (reading).
