My favorite form of entertainment is rock concerts. I have been to about 35 of them over the years. About 25 of my concert experiences have been positive and free of significant distractions, but about 10 of them, including the two this week, caused me high anxiety.
These 10 concert distractions, like many in my later years in the classroom, do not seem related to others sensing my vulnerability, but it seems there are other forces in the universe we do not understand that create these odd realities. I am alive today due to many of these odd realities, but am grossly under achieving and unsatisfied due to other odd realities. Many are odd by themselves, and some odd due to their frequency.
After feeling wired for about four weeks, I finally felt this last Tuesday that I was snapping out of it, as I greatly anticipated a Brit Floyd concert. I saw them last year without distraction and they were fantastic. This time, I went home despondent and wired.
I purchased a small four dollar popcorn, but the clerk said she was out of small boxes, so she game me the large $11 tub for no extra charge. Little did I know this generous move would ruin the concert. When I returned to my seat after intermission, half the popcorn was spilled in front of my seat. I didn't eat it since it was stale.
During the best part of the concert, my feet were slipping in greasy stale popcorn, which concerned me when we stood up for applause or letting people by.
As with most of the 1000 plus specific distractions I have experienced in life, the anxiety came from not enjoying my 2nd favorite song of all time to the fullest, and that I was alone as the only concert guest with popcorn under my seat.
I was therefore miserable and wired the next day due to another "What are the odds" moment. The rational part of me knows this is not a big fricken' deal and nothing to be upset about the next day, but the irrational part of me prevailed.
Last night was worse. I saw an absolutely fantastic Jethro Tull concert, and was convinced at the beginning that this would be a distraction free night.
But during his first song, the arena starts swaying, like a giant raft on a boat. We were feeling the 7.1 earthquake from Ridgecrest.
I called my folks to see if they were OK, and then about 10 minutes later, a terrible chill came over my body, and this great concert was then ruined. It dawned on me suddenly that there was no way to know if my apartment avoided damage. I was concerned about a tilted lamp that I was afraid would tilt over and start a fire.
I was also worried that my 15 cassette tapes that have the first 30 years of my autobiography might be ruined since they were in a bookcase near the front, and could topple on the floor with the case falling on them. I also knew I would not get home for another four hours, and there was no one I could call to check up on things since I live alone. I was miserable during a great concert.
I should add that I am fully aware of the fact that I am one of luckiest people on this planet with regards to avoiding major disasters. I would never trade any of my 1000 + unlikely satisfaction destroying life events for even one more normal destructive malady, such as being maimed in a car accident or an earthquake. It is as if I have a guardian angel watching over me, and I count my blessings every day. I think this is why I will never go insane. I will never take my great survival fortune for granted.
There is one concert distraction that happened about 12 years ago, and I would like to know if the fellow next to me was sensing my vulnerabilities, or would have been discourteous to anyone. I was trying to enjoy a great triple concert at Mandalay Bay, when the strange fellow next to me starting pounding his empty water bottle on our shared seat handle throughout the concert. Of course if I was not such a whimp, I would have politely told him to stop, but I let him do it for three hours.
I did not know him, but was he somehow able to size up my vulnerabilities in about five minutes?
These 10 concert distractions, like many in my later years in the classroom, do not seem related to others sensing my vulnerability, but it seems there are other forces in the universe we do not understand that create these odd realities. I am alive today due to many of these odd realities, but am grossly under achieving and unsatisfied due to other odd realities. Many are odd by themselves, and some odd due to their frequency.
After feeling wired for about four weeks, I finally felt this last Tuesday that I was snapping out of it, as I greatly anticipated a Brit Floyd concert. I saw them last year without distraction and they were fantastic. This time, I went home despondent and wired.
I purchased a small four dollar popcorn, but the clerk said she was out of small boxes, so she game me the large $11 tub for no extra charge. Little did I know this generous move would ruin the concert. When I returned to my seat after intermission, half the popcorn was spilled in front of my seat. I didn't eat it since it was stale.
During the best part of the concert, my feet were slipping in greasy stale popcorn, which concerned me when we stood up for applause or letting people by.
As with most of the 1000 plus specific distractions I have experienced in life, the anxiety came from not enjoying my 2nd favorite song of all time to the fullest, and that I was alone as the only concert guest with popcorn under my seat.
I was therefore miserable and wired the next day due to another "What are the odds" moment. The rational part of me knows this is not a big fricken' deal and nothing to be upset about the next day, but the irrational part of me prevailed.
Last night was worse. I saw an absolutely fantastic Jethro Tull concert, and was convinced at the beginning that this would be a distraction free night.
But during his first song, the arena starts swaying, like a giant raft on a boat. We were feeling the 7.1 earthquake from Ridgecrest.
I called my folks to see if they were OK, and then about 10 minutes later, a terrible chill came over my body, and this great concert was then ruined. It dawned on me suddenly that there was no way to know if my apartment avoided damage. I was concerned about a tilted lamp that I was afraid would tilt over and start a fire.
I was also worried that my 15 cassette tapes that have the first 30 years of my autobiography might be ruined since they were in a bookcase near the front, and could topple on the floor with the case falling on them. I also knew I would not get home for another four hours, and there was no one I could call to check up on things since I live alone. I was miserable during a great concert.
I should add that I am fully aware of the fact that I am one of luckiest people on this planet with regards to avoiding major disasters. I would never trade any of my 1000 + unlikely satisfaction destroying life events for even one more normal destructive malady, such as being maimed in a car accident or an earthquake. It is as if I have a guardian angel watching over me, and I count my blessings every day. I think this is why I will never go insane. I will never take my great survival fortune for granted.
There is one concert distraction that happened about 12 years ago, and I would like to know if the fellow next to me was sensing my vulnerabilities, or would have been discourteous to anyone. I was trying to enjoy a great triple concert at Mandalay Bay, when the strange fellow next to me starting pounding his empty water bottle on our shared seat handle throughout the concert. Of course if I was not such a whimp, I would have politely told him to stop, but I let him do it for three hours.
I did not know him, but was he somehow able to size up my vulnerabilities in about five minutes?
