Transitioning ....

[Winterhope]

I work as a line therapist and was hoping there may be someone here who could help me with a specific situation. I am working with a very bright 4 year old girl who has become very non-compliant during transitions from play to programs. It's become a pattern now and I need ideas on how to break this pattern. We use toys for reinforcement but during the non-compliance episodes nothing is working for reinforcement. Any suggestions?

 

[dudeman]

We need more information so we can give you better, more accurate advice. What exactly do you mean by "non-compliant"?

 

[Winterhope]

Resisting, crying.....occasionally throwing things. We play in between programs and sometimes she's very responsive to this and other times shuts me out.

 

[Kari Suttle]

What is your job as her line therapist? I don't really have experience with four year olds but i babysit a two year old. It sounds as if she is having difficulty going from one activity to another and is crying and resisting, am i right?

The first thought that comes to mind is routine - are these changes predictable for her? Does she get ten/five/one minute warnings, anything like that? What do you do when she is non-compliant? Do her parents or preschool teachers see this behavior at home/preschool as well, and if so what do they do? For the two year old i babysit full time, with him being firm but gentle and consistent works with him, but like i said he's two not four and he has no need for therapy.

Edit: This just occurred to me, and it might not be totally appropriate for the child you work with, but with the child i babysit it works for him. The two year old i babysit used to cry inconsolably when he got mad or upset. When this happened, I would tell him gently, firmly, either "Tell me." or "Show me." depending on how verbal he was at the time. My goal was to get him to communicate with me what he wanted (instead of dropping to the floor in a heap crying) so that we could work through it. Given that the child you work with is resisting and crying and occassionally throwing things, perhaps teaching her to communicate her feelings with you appropriately might be helpful.

 

[Aspergirl4hire]

Hm. I don't have advice, but I have a story.

When my son was transitioning to 3 at daycare, his angelic behavior changed. He was uncooperative. He 'forgot' toilet training. He was inconsistent about listening or taking direction. At home, he was himself.

The daycare asked me to talk to them, and I observed him where he couldn't see me. Later, I said, "He's butting heads with the new teacher. I don't see a problem with any of the kids, do you?"

"No," they said.

"So what changed?"

"He doesn't see Jan any more...oh, he's been with her nearly 18 months...her style is very different."

So we arranged for Jan to do brief daily visits, with him specifically, and also to touch base with Mo, so that he could see his favorite person with the new person and give Mo some of Jan's "aura." The problem cleared up quickly.

So...has something been lost in your situation, and the child is trying to tell you what it is?

 

[watersprite]

When my daughter was 4 she went through a stage - that is all I can describe it as - in which transitions were absolutely horrendous. This was a shock to me because up until then she'd been, albeit highly challenging, fairly smooth about trainsitions. I really think that there are times when sheer exhaustion and a need for some food becomes what is behind some of these difficult times.
Try slowing down the activities way ahead of time, and make sure this child is rested and well fed.
Sorry, that is all I have to say. Quiet patience and love is needed in abundance.