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The Wave of Sadness

Firnafth

Firnafth

Mammalogist
V.I.P Member
Sometimes I just suddenly feel very sad for little to no reason. My eyes and forehead will ache like I want to cry and my stomach will get tense. This can persist for a few hours. Sometimes there is a slight reason I might be upset which may be related to it (but the response is a bit bizarre and out of proportion) and sometimes there appears to be no reason at all.

There are some mood disorders in my family so I think that's where this came from; in my case it's not crippling, but rather annoying. Listening to music can help. I can also distract myself with reading or movies, but after I'm done with the distraction the feeling tends to come back.

Does anybody else experience this kind of thing?
 
I used to get that a lot a few years ago. It sucked because it felt like I needed to cry but for some reason I just couldn't, it was like I was depressed about something but couldn't put my finger on exactly what it was. Like you Firnafth I was able to distract myself but very often found it didn't make the feelings go away. Are you feeling like that now, by any chance? If so, then I hope you feel better soon.
 
The Wave of Sadness, I like the way you named it. I get this a lot. Now I do get a lot of melancholic depressions too, but those are different (if only for the duration)
Distraction helps. Sometimes. And as you said, it doesn't really make the feeling go away. Sometimes I'd try to sleep it of, but that's usually not helping with my already chaotic sleep-wake cycle. A new thing I've been trying is to just go for it. If I'm going to be sad, I might as well do it with some conviction, without feeling guilty or bad just because I'm sad. I grew up with a lot of depression in my direct family, and friends who weren't very keen to accept sadness (putting it mildly), so I couldn't really be sad, at least not without adding a truckload of guilt to the mixture. I wouldn't really recommend it, as there are clearly some dangers involved in going pedal to the floor into a wall, even if said pedal, floor and wall are entirely metaphorical, but I'd like to think that it does help me keep the more severe depressions at bay. Maybe it's because this way, I am (or feel) more in control about it, instead of the sadness controlling me.
 
i get waves of depression which are lovelly- i find that the only thing i can do is just to let it pass. After all it is just a wave. just be calm and try to distract yourself whilst it passes :) comedy usually helps me
 
I think that could answer the question why one minute I feel down one minute and the next that I'm not and I did have depression when I was about 16... But only because I had so many things on my mind so nowadays what I try to do is just block these thoughts out of my head but it doesn't always tend to work for me.

Comedy also works for me also. :D
 
I've experienced this and have read that it is part of AS. An inability to recognize and/or control ones own emotions...and I've notice in myself and have read we can be easily drawn into the emotions of those around us (sympathy, not empathy). The articles generally state we have 3 general ways of handling this...become very emotional (disproportionate to situation, meltdown), repress those feelings because we might be afraid of loosing control of them (shutdown), or not even recognize the feelings or unable to identify them as feelings and seem cold and callus to those around us.
 
superboyian said:
what I try to do is just block these thoughts out of my head but it doesn't always tend to work for me.
Click to expand...
I block out all the thoughts of sadness and negativity, but it doesn't always work with me either.

Its weird because at times when everything should be good or I should be happy it hits me and all of a sudden I am sad and thinking about all the negative in my life. It is like a "wave of sadness".
 
I am glad to see that I am not alone! Many of the comments here are insightful. I don't feel sad right now but the arrival of the sad feelings is unpredictable. I'll try to expose myself to more comedy in the future when this happens as more than one person has recommended it.
 
@gonzerd: it does sound kind of awesome in a terrible way, doesn't it? :p

I hate "The Wave of Sadness". I get it quite often (three or more times a week), but not as much as I used to (several times a day).
I have found that caffeine helps A LOT. It not only makes the sadness go away, but prevents it from happening in most cases. So I drink copious amounts of coffee/energy drinks a day. Sometimes I drink two Monster BFCs in a day, plus coffee :p
Note: I don't recommend doing the same. I'm a really big guy with a fairly "hardcore" metabolism. If you're under 150 pounds, drinking two BFCs in a row will probably send you into cardiac arrest.
 
i've had it since early childhood and didnt understand why, now i do. good to know it's a direct cause of ASD. i get it more when the sun sets or it starts getting dark. but unfortunately i've gone through years when i felt depression every day! but not all day long, just on and off during the day.
doing something i like, the zoo, the shopping center, hanging out with my nieces or this forum, helps a lot. but although it makes the depression easy it doesnt always eliminate it completely. and i get depressed for no reason or for the slighetest reason that really shouldnt bother me at all, wouldnt bother an NT at all, i'm sure, stupid little reasons. i get depressed when bored, too. just working on a boring job makes me depressed, frustrated, angry and anxious, which is rediculous.
when my cats were alive having them sit in my lap and purr while being patted helped so much.
 
I kinda identify with it.

I need to keep my mind on doing things I like (or have a goal towards doing things). And to be honest, even the slightest thing that bothers me is if people stop me from doing my "fun things". I can't be bothered by doing task X because it has to be done. I'm "working" on keeping myself sane and happy.

Yet, sometimes, and I kinda feel it's money related.. I tend to worry a bit on top of not having cash to go do anything (or even buy some comfort food, lol) is where I get stuck in a loop until I have money again. I need to keep busy, and keeping busy costs some money sometimes... thus i end up getting annoyed and depressed over the fact that I can't do a lot except sitting at home and doing nothing but wait for the days to pass till I get new cash in. But that in general has become something that's not that bad anymore.. I can usually cover my month with the money I have in regards to projects (and the mandatory bills) to not be totally broke for the entire month, and end up being short on cash for like.. 3 days or so. Those are usually the worst 3 days of the month.

I don't really like spending money in general though... so the entire thing of "I have something new" doesn't really matter to me. But I usually have some good ideas I wanna do and then end up with "oh crap... can't really afford to blow 200 bucks on parts to build X" and I get kinda blocked in my train of thought to actually make things or use my "skills"... that's depressing the most.

Sometimes I just look up nostalgia things to make me feel a bit more comfy... like toy reviews, or cartoons from when I was a kid/teen and watch those... relive those moments a bit to make me feel a bit less stressed out.
 
Look,

I don't like to discuss theism very much. Feel free to PM me. I take a low dose of Fluxoxetine for this. The same as Temple Grandin. It works. I used to be so bad (depressed) at one job I could not get out of bed on weekends. It is terrible if you are caught in the trap. But there is help. The general name for the drug is Prosaic.
 
It must be an AS thing. I tend to get it too. I don't like taking medications because they often have preservatives that I am allergic to. So I listen to music often, read, take pics of my dollies any kind of distractions. Its its like a wave I love how you put that. Like you have to ride it out before it comes again. :cute:
 
I know I'm very late to post in this thread, but hopefully someone will see it and it will help someone. I usually take deep breaths and just think-if there's a reason that I'm sad-, is it likely that this is true/will happen? Just something along those lines. Listening to music, watching funny videos or looking at funny pictures, and painting usually helps me. Do something to take your mind off of it.
 
an important thing I learned was that it's okay to be sad sometimes or feel emotions other than happiness. We are after all, human, which means we experience the same ups and downs as everybody. It's natural. Learning how to cope is my biggest challenge
 
I can relate. I often go through waves of depression, though I often find that playing or listening to music help me cope, as does spending time with friends.
 
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