• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

The Smallest Things Making Me Shutdown Or Get Annoyed

Robby

Well-Known Member
For me for as long as I can remember I have things I just can't tolerate if they are a different way like if someplace is too bright or doesn't have shades over the windows and too much light gets in I just can't stand that it just drives me up the wall. Growing up I was always wanting to pull the blinds or curtains because of this. To this day even driving I have to keep the blinders a certain way so not much sun gets through the windshield. And if a room is too hot or stuffy, I just want to shutdown or run away. Or being around someone who talks too much or has an annoying laugh, hate those things too. I either shutdown and try to put myself out of body, or leave if I can. Obviously for me crowds are a huge problem and large groups of people I avoid like the plague. I am known to do things at night because there is less light and less crowds for that reason. I've never had mute phases where I totally mute but if I am annoyed or triggered I do kind of shutdown and go in my own world. As a child I was in study hall. The teacher monitoring it was scolding me for something. I think I was talking to another kid or something. She asked me like 4 times and I didn't hear her or just blocked her out. Finally she just yelled at top of her lungs it really traumatized me and I just shutdown. They thought I was just very hard of hearing or obstinate I guess. But looking back I realize now that was part of my undiagnosed autism.
 
My main sensitivity is with noise, and I have certain things which trigger me, such as TV commercials suddenly blasting out of the TV set, people shouting, lots of people in a crowded room talking loudly (or so it seems to me), whistling, cutlery and plates clashing together, children screaming, dogs yapping, motorbikes, cigarette smoke, etc. Natural daylight doesn't bother me, and I need it to see well, but bright artificial lighting shining in my eyes bothers me in the same way the sun does. I do my best to avoid being in situations in which I know I may encounter problems, but this isn't always possible. These things may not be stressful to others, they may not even notice them, but are stressful to me and can bother me a lot. I withdraw into myself or try to focus on something else like a fidget toy or something. I'm certainly not going to be very social under those circumstances, and will leave as soon as possible.
 
My main sensitivity is with noise, and I have certain things which trigger me, such as TV commercials suddenly blasting out of the TV set, people shouting, lots of people in a crowded room talking loudly (or so it seems to me), whistling, cutlery and plates clashing together, children screaming, dogs yapping, motorbikes, cigarette smoke, etc.

Me too! When i first started my current - and first ever - job as a cashier at one of the local super busy grocery stores, i would literally get anxiety attacks daily, if not multiple times a day, because the noise level and so many conflicting noises from every direction was overwhelming. When I was little my mom always took me with her to the store early in the morning cause then we could get in, get our stuff, and get out and she wouldn't have to wait in line. Cart wheels squeaking, big boxes of beer being slammed onto the belts, registers and handscanners beeping, the supervisors' handhelds beeping, kids talking, parents talking, babies screaming, people calling over the intercom, etc.

It was constant sensory overload until I learned to use my aspie ability to hyperfocus to my advantage. I taught myself to focus fully on my current customer, to the point of not even noticing that my line had a good three or four people waiting behind my current customer. Hyperfocus to the exclusion of all else. It helped, and i haven't had any big issues with noise since. I get a little frazzled when my lunch break and shift end time approach, or if i'm not feeling good, and that sometimes provokes a shutdown a week, but its been a lot better than it used to be.
 
Natural daylight bothers me and always has. When I was in my thirties a psychiatrist suggested I was delusional because I told him I didn't like to go in the sun, that the sun hurt me. He made some flippant comment about me being a vampire and I joked with him that maybe I was a vampire. The autistic sarcasm doesn't go over well with allistics, I am learning, and I was misdiagnosed with a delusional disorder. Fast forward ten years and I have been diagnosed with SLE lupus - a huge component of which is photosensitivity. UV light can make us very ill. It is likely I had it back then (had some symptoms but nothing major in the USA) but it took coming to Australia where the UV is very high for it to kick in. Moral of this anecdotal story is gotta respect the sensitivity, I guess.

I am easily triggered by a lot of things though I find 'other people' my biggest issue. I recently divested from FB and I am so much happier without it in my life. That was a sensory overload I couldn't tolerate. I tend to shop at night, even before lupus dx, shop online, avoid crowded places, heat, fitted clothing (always hated that). Like Kari, 'conflicting noises' are overwhelming for me. Mess bothers me, too. I like clean. I have learned to be far more tolerant of mess than I was pre-kid, but I function better in an organised and clean environment (not clinical, but tidy). Bad smells bother me, especially the smell of dead animal flesh. I'm vegetarian and can't walk past butcher shops without gagging on the smell, which may have had a lot to do with me becoming vegetarian. The raw chicken shops we have in almost every shopping centre in Australia are the worst. Smells like salmonella. Mmmmm, salmonella. o_O
 
I'm probably in a more "priviledged" position in that I can avoid any and all things that actually get on my nerves up to potential meltdowns.

But I have plenty of things that bother me big time, including noises and lights. But I guess any senses will apply somehow.
 
I have a long list of minor sensory triggers which can render me dysfunctional, but one which I feel particularly conflicted about: high-pitched voices (especially female), and too many soft slurring or whistling "sss" sounds in a person's diction. I can't describe how painful they are, and yet I know the person doesn't intend to be annoying. A young woman who rang me up at the shop yesterday had one of those incorrigibly cheerful, sing-song, "I am such a cute girl" voices and she may as well have dragged her manicured nails across a chalkboard, I felt as if someone was drilling into my head. It was all I could do not to cover my ears...
 

New Threads

Top Bottom