The mutual flies check

[Spiller]

Since you asked.

Ooooo!

 

[Spiller]

Last week, I asked my NT friend.. and he laughed and said he'd never seen this, right? Then I was with him yesterday and on parting, he shook my hand in a 'Seasonal ritual' kinda way.. BUT, a groinward glance ensued! And when I pointed and went "Ahaaa!" he still didn't know he'd done it!
Is it too late to set up a poll for this thread? Cos so far, it's been 'Package Check', with a smattering of 'scratch 'n' Sniff', but I'm rooting for 'Pre-handshake' ritual as it's usually on parting company, whereas a 'package check' would surely be on first contact?

 

[Judge]

Seriously, I think the only time I ever heard a group of guys say, "Check your package" was in a movie.

- "The Boys From Company C".

 

[Maelstrom]

Last week, I asked my NT friend.. and he laughed and said he'd never seen this, right? Package Check

You don't seriously expect any of us strait guys to admit this do you? We would sooner do our hail Mary's. And I don't know why you're complaining as it likely indicates they are jealous that you're h.... ahem! like a horse. I will let slide the possible motivation..... for the ahem! thread Ha ha!

 

[Nitro]

Seriously, I think the only time I ever heard a group of guys say, "Check your package" was in a movie.

- "The Boys From Company C".

Kennywood is a very popular older amusement park in my area open only in the summer, A question to another kid during the spring was "is Kennywood open?"
and either no,or yes,Kennywood is open

check you zipper was replaced with "Hey...Kennywood's open" in my youth

 

[Spiller]

You don't seriously expect any of us strait guys to admit this do you? We would sooner do our hail Mary's. And I don't know why you're complaining as it likely indicates they are jealous that you're h.... ahem! like a horse. I will let slide the possible motivation..... for the ahem! thread Ha ha!

Well, I thank you for the compliment Maelstrom Does this mean you've spotted this action and know what it means?
..You think it's just a case of "Is that a canoe in your pocket, or are you pleased to see me?" (Rick Mayal to Queen Victoria in Black Adder)
Is there any odd behaviour.. besides the usual, you've noticed, that piqued your curiosity?

Is Kennywood open?.. Excellent, Nitro! I'd love to hear other euphemisms regarding this

 

[wyverary]

Let's try and keep this discussion as clean and tasteful as possible, please.

 

[Spiller]

Let's try and keep this discussion as clean and tasteful as possible, please.

I know, right? People here are so prone to toilet humor I'm afraid it'll warp my fragile little mind

 

[Maelstrom]

[QUOTE="Spiller, Does this mean you've spotted this action and know what it means? [/QUOTE]

I am admitting to nothing, and buying glue for my halo, I think it's a mostly a instinctive dog sniffing thing, nothing more.

 

[Nitro]

I didn't do nuffin'
oops...that was his moderator voice...I think he means business

 

[Spiller]

I didn't do nuffin'
oops...that was his moderator voice...I think he means business

Shhhhhh!!!.. (don't look, maybe he won't notice)..

 

[wyverary]

I mean it. I would rather not have to execute the nuclear action and shut the thread down.

 

[Red Star]

General accepted theory:
Groin check- males have an inbuilt subconscious requirement to check the 'maleness' and dominance of other males - whether they are strangers walking into a room or people they've known forever. This is done through a 'glance' to the groin area of other males predominantly to check size and 'manliness'. The theory is that the bigger it all is, the more likely you are to be able to continue the human race and be aggressive enough to protect what is yours. I stress that this is a subconscious act that 'most' males do without realising, regardless of orientation. It is usually on the inward greet with others. Somewhere you will think "This guy's tougher/weaker than me" but it will be far back in the mind and not even noticed.
Boob check - Females check hips and boobs subconsciously of other females to judge productivity and the ability to provide for their young (breastfeeding). Again, I stress the subconscious action of this.
Apart from the plainly obvious option of males looking at females (or male/male, female/female options) and females looking at males for mating purposes, obvious alternatives to this would be as has been said earlier - badly fitting bras (sometimes intentional) where there's 'fallout', larger than 'average' sizes, clothing or poses designed to 'show' features.
There are others but generally, the accepted theory is as above.
My personal experience as I watch people is that they do a lot of things subconsciously, fiddle with rings, fingers, zips, bras, ears etc, this is simply that

 

[Spiller]

I mean it. I would rather not have to execute the nuclear action and shut the thread down.

Wyverary, I acknowledge the Red Voiced tone of your warning and sincerely apologise on behalf of myself and anyone who may inadvertently have lowered the general tone
May adult conversation resume

this is a subconscious act that 'most' males do without realising, regardless of orientation. It is usually on the inward greet with others.

Interesting, though I'm not entirely sure on the 'subconcious' part there, given that I may be far more conciously aware of my body position, if not entirely the 'language' I'm exhibiting, due to my years of efforts to 'fit in' by attempting to mimic others.
I people-watch constantly and continously attempt to gauge the effect my appearance and actions have on them.
I observe such behaviour in others with curiosity and don't know how to copy it if I don't know what it means.
By the way, thanks for snatching the thread out of the hands of nuclear action

 

[Red Star]

Outward greet actions can include the 'handshake check' – will they /won't they shake hands?

This is done by looking at the other persons hand – down by the groin, possibly in a pocket – to see if it's going to be raised for a handshake.

It happens because people aren't always sure if someone is going to and can result in the 'up-down-up-down-uncomfy laugh' scenario- raise your hand to shake but realising the others hand isn't there, lowers it as the other raises theirs and so on. Often there's a smile or laugh. A similar process happens when you're trying to dodge people in an aisle and you both sidestep in the same direction.

The subconscious part is when you do something and aren't aware or aren't FULLY aware, in the way you might do a 'habit', it may only be for a moment, before you realise what you're doing but a moment is all you need for the brain to take in the info it's looking for.

Photographic/eidetic memories may remember the action of checking but as it isn't considered 'necessary', it is sent to the 'don't care' box unless otherwise stated by the requirements for mating, protection or dominance for example.

Some may process differently by either not 'checking' or by acting immediately on the check.

An experience of mine was the 'escape' of a bra wire – I was asked what the 'thing' was sticking up at the front of my top – the wire looked like I had an aerial poking out – I told them “I was wearing a wire and everything they said was recorded” - they weren't impressed.

 

[Spiller]

Stubble!
I posit that:
Am is inversely proportional to Cm
Where:
Am= maximum Attraction
Cm=maximum Contact
Basically, the more stubble (up to a maximum limit, ie, 'getting rather beardy' (no offence to those with beards, or those who love them)), the greater attraction.. So .. the less desire for intimate contact.
(Based on an experimental sample of.. well, 1)
Ladies comments are greatly appreciated here.. stubble rash when kissing?
My experiments have indicated a greater number of positive, maintained eye contact incidents (defined as greater than 0.5 mississippies, extending to a maximum of 2.5 mississipies and including 'slight smiles' and 'shy, diverted glances')
Currently, in the UK, at least, the preference seems to be 3 days of stubble generally, or 'getting rather beardy' if you wear biker clothes and ride a cool bike/drive a muscle car.
..Opinions please