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Secretly autistic

Geoo98

Member
Does anyone else not tell anyone about their autism?

Because it's only a recent realisation (like over the past year) and it's not yet an official diagnosis I find it really difficult letting people know because I feel people are mostly too ignorant to understand.
My two best friends and two of my other friends know but that's it (plus close relatives and my college counsellor).
One of the new guys in my group is autistic but iruggle socialising with him so I haven't managed to talk to him about it. Some of the people in the group are rude to him though because apparently he comes across 'creepy' and it winds me up so I defend him and attempt to talk to him.
It's pretty much stuff like that that stops me telling people.

What are some of your experiences with it?
 
I just figured out two years ago I was an aspie. Only a few close relatives know. They were all happy that I now understand myself better. I told three people in my Sunday school class but I don't think they thought I was serious. Being the teacher II have to put on my highly social persona for an hour each sunday. I did tell one of my customers only because she has a son on the spectrum and we had a good conversation about it but for the most part I have no reason to tell people.
 
I self-diagnosed two years ago, officially diagnosed six weeks ago.

Makes no difference - sometimes you come across someone who knows - even if they aren't on the Spectrum themselves.. mostly you encounter people who have no idea, you find yourself fending off - or trying to defend against - meaningless and devaluing comments, "you don't look autistic", "Anyone can..", "It's not difficult to..", "Just.."..

Ok, it's easy for them.. they can't possibly know how hard it is for me!

I learned not to tell too many people.. actually, I now just smile or grin widely - that upsets the situation, they get confused and flustered instead of me and they don't mention it again. Hooray!
 
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I self-diagnosed two years ago, officially diagnosed six weeks ago.

Makes no difference - sometimes you come across someone who knows - even if they aren't on the Spectrum themselves.. mostly you encounter people who have no idea, you find yourself fending off - or trying to defend against - meaningless and devaluing comments, "you don't look autistic", "Anyone can..", "It's not difficult to..", "Just.."..

Ok, it's easy for them.. they can't possibly know how hard it is for me!

I learned not to tell too many people.. actually, I now just smile or grin widely - that upsets the situation, they get confused and flustered instead of you and they don't mention it again. Hooray!

No matter what you do or say, they get confused. Nine times out of ten, they can not or will not understand. I am with you, I do not tell many people. It is a need to know basis only.
 
I am very selective of who gets told. Most won't understand it anyway to begin with so what exactly is the point.
Sometimes I tell people so they avoid me :D
 
My immediate family and one friend know, locally. Several others in other places know, but that doesn't worry me. No one else needs it at this time.
 
I don't usually tell a lot of people that I am an Aspie, but certain people know. I have many friends who are extremely ignorant of AS and Autism in general, but that is when you can teach people about what it is like to have it and general information if you know any information. It is sometimes helpful for people if you elaborate on it if you do mention it, especially if they are ignorant. For the most part, I don't tell people. I let them figure it out on their own. If they have questions, then they ask me. But beyond that, I try not to tell the whole world that I have Asperger Syndrome.
 
The only people that know is my immediate family (who were the ones to suggest the possibility in the first place), my former friend, and my sort of friend. No one at my cashier job knows knows, though i suspect a coworker is a diagnosed aspie so for all i know they've picked up on it and just don't know how to ask. I feel like especially cause i dont have a diagnosis, people would probably just pass it off - "well im shy around people too" or that sort of thing, cause i've gotten that before. If someone asked straight up and i trusted them enough i'd probably tell them, but i would only trust a select few people with that information. All of whom i work with who would probably benefit from knowing anyways.
 
Does anyone else not tell anyone about their autism?

Because it's only a recent realisation (like over the past year) and it's not yet an official diagnosis I find it really difficult letting people know because I feel people are mostly too ignorant to understand.
My two best friends and two of my other friends know but that's it (plus close relatives and my college counsellor).
One of the new guys in my group is autistic but iruggle socialising with him so I haven't managed to talk to him about it. Some of the people in the group are rude to him though because apparently he comes across 'creepy' and it winds me up so I defend him and attempt to talk to him.
It's pretty much stuff like that that stops me telling people.

What are some of your experiences with it?
Yes, I keep this very close to my vest. Especially because irresponsible people try to link autism and criminality. Some talking head tried to suggest that Dylan Roof has autism. Since so many people jump to conclusions, I don't want to be eyed with fear, uncertainty, and doubt. I only tell professionals and even only when necessary for continuity of care.
 
At the moment I'm still 'in the closet' and I don't tell anyone unless there is a good reason to do so. I consider it to be a very private matter, and only close family members know about it. I worry that if I tell people, they will judge me according to stereotypes adn people won't see me for who I am.
 

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