Question if it normal for me to have inappropriate anger as a 23-year-old

[Hypnalis]

I feel so foolish, I am sorry

You shouldn't be sorry about something like this. Narcs can fool almost anyone.
On the plus side, you did what had to be done, and you're free again. This is a good outcome.

And it's definitely a learning opportunity

Some advice for you: as a general rule, you should come to terms with your own problems before getting close to someone with issues. Relationship-wise this is not easy in the 21st century, but it's still a good heuristic.

"Come to terms" there doesn't mean "fully resolve". If you understand and can live with your failings without negatively affecting other people, you're already in better shape than most. If, in addition, you are self-sufficient, mentally and emotionally stable, and resilient, you're in better shape than almost everyone.

It's ok to get help along the way, or to maintain a good state. What matters is the result, and having, at worst, a neutral affect on other people.

 

[Oz67]

You shouldn't be sorry about something like this. Narcs can fool almost anyone.
On the plus side, you did what had to be done, and you're free again. This is a good outcome.

And it's definitely a learning opportunity

Some advice for you: as a general rule, you should come to terms with your own problems before getting close to someone with issues. Relationship-wise this is not easy in the 21st century, but it's still a good heuristic.

"Come to terms" there doesn't mean "fully resolve". If you understand and can live with your failings without negatively affecting other people, you're already in better shape than most. If, in addition, you are self-sufficient, mentally and emotionally stable, and resilient, you're in better shape than almost everyone.

It's ok to get help along the way, or to maintain a good state. What matters is the result, and having, at worst, a neutral affect on other people.

Thank you so much

 

[jsilver256]

@Oz67 you are proof that someone is not defined by their labels, your politeness and humility are an inspiration!

 

[Oz67]

@Oz67 you are proof that someone is not defined by their labels, your politeness and humility are an inspiration!

Thanks, I appreciate it

 

[Streetwise]

I definitely agree, that is why I go to therapy and support groups.

wish i could.

Never been so embarassed as the very! first! telephone therapy appointment with an nhs psychologist i fell asleep, i very rarely fall asleep through daylight hours, she was alright said people need to sleep, so i would go on spec, but appointments nah!, just more hyperventilation.

I don't think i sleep, i think i pass out after hours,days of trying to cope with panic disorder

 

[Judge]

This thread makes me look back and consider the combination of stress and perseverance I had in my first real career job working in insurance in mid mid-twenties.

Yeah, I wish I had been paid each time I lost my temper over something that went sideways. Then again no one threatened to fire me over them either. I suppose what counted was not to have lost my temper directed towards any coworkers. That may have saved me.

Bottom line: "Normal" or not, it happens.

 

[Oz67]

wish i could.

Never been so embarassed as the very! first! telephone therapy appointment with an nhs psychologist i fell asleep, i very rarely fall asleep through daylight hours, she was alright said people need to sleep, so i would go on spec, but appointments nah!, just more hyperventilation.

I don't think i sleep, i think i pass out after hours,days of trying to cope with panic disorder

That makes sense.

 

[Oz67]

This thread makes me look back and consider the combination of stress and perseverance I had in my first real career job working in insurance in mid mid-twenties.

Yeah, I wish I had been paid each time I lost my temper over something that went sideways. Then again no one threatened to fire me over them either. I suppose what counted was not to have lost my temper directed towards any coworkers. That may have saved me.

Bottom line: "Normal" or not, it happens.

I agree