Pulling out hair - is it hurting him?

[Cutesie]

My autistic brother Ikey lives in a group home. He hasn't been taught how to shave himself. The staff there rarely do it for him; they have the barber do it when he gets a haircut. He doesn't like having a beard, so he pulls the hairs out by hand. You'll often see him with big bald spots, which make it appear as if he has some physical disorder.

This isn't a question about the propriety of what the staff do, or about how we could intervene. What I'm wondering about is how much Ikey feels pain when he does the pulling. Does it hurt a lot, but the compulsion causes him to do it anyway? Does his desire and the distracted nature of what he is doing make him just not notice it? (It's also possible that he enjoys the pain.) Though he is verbal, he hasn't been able to answer when I've asked about it.

There's no way, of course, that anyone here knows the answer. I'm interested to see if people who do similar things have an awareness of how they experience it.

 

[Outdated]

I don't pluck hair the way your brother does but quite often I'll pluck individual hairs that are annoying me. No, it doesn't hurt. Not real hurt anyway. No different to plucking ear and nose hair. Although sometimes plucking the ones in my nose makes my eyes water, never understood that, it doesn't hurt at all but it affects my eyes.

 

[jsilver256]

I don't have hair-plucking but during painful stims, the pain relieves the emotions and the emotions relieve the pain. So they don't "hurt" in the same way.

 

[Tired]

My autistic boyfriend told me, that he feels pain differently on different days. Sometimes he's very sensitive, and just a touch makes him cringe, while on another days he broke a finger on his feet and didn't notice, on days like that he says he feels numb. So it can change from day to day.

 

[Cutesie]

I don't have hair-plucking but during painful stims, the pain relieves the emotions and the emotions relieve the pain. So they don't "hurt" in the same way.

I can definitely see this applying to Ikey. I've used long fasting to distract from emotional hurt and to feel a sense of control. There have been occasions that I also intentionally caused pain by pressing strongly on nerves. Besides for the stress-reduction benefit, it just gives a different sensation that is... soothing? (I'm doing now to test, and there is something satisfying, but I'm not sure how.) Experimenting with damaging types of self-harm - cutting and the like - has been tempting many times, but I haven't gone there.

 

[AuroraBorealis]

I have always pulled my eyelashes and eyebrows, especially while I was a teenager. I thought for a long time that I have trichotillomania (you can google that), but the experiences never quite resonated with me, and I concluded a while ago that pulling hairs for me is a form of stimming.

No, it doesn't hurt.

Ironically, I could never get a waxing or something similar. They mere thought makes me cringe all over.

 

[lunarious]

My autistic boyfriend told me, that he feels pain differently on different days. Sometimes he's very sensitive, and just a touch makes him cringe, while on another days he broke a finger on his feet and didn't notice, on days like that he says he feels numb. So it can change from day to day.

Really?

 

[lunarious]

I can definitely see this applying to Ikey. I've used long fasting to distract from emotional hurt and to feel a sense of control. There have been occasions that I also intentionally caused pain by pressing strongly on nerves. Besides for the stress-reduction benefit, it just gives a different sensation that is... soothing? (I'm doing now to test, and there is something satisfying, but I'm not sure how.) Experimenting with damaging types of self-harm - cutting and the like - has been tempting many times, but I haven't gone there.

There is:
1 Pain.
2 Pleasure.
0 Hell, where you experience "nothing" (in the case of Asperger's maybe attentively).

So Pain is better than Hell.

 

[lunarious]

My History teacher, when I accidentally had History said: "Hair symbolizes Strength, and there are many examples of this. Muslim females cover their hair to hide it away from God as sign of submission. Kings and Strong people had long hair often."

I thought that Buddha told the females if you insist on going inside the Monstary, where Monks (whom were all males) are, you must shave your head.

Never cut the hair of a Samurai

We in my chosen faith Believe Hair and Fingernail are dead tissue and doesn't require purification, in Ghosol or Ablution. Hair is natually pure tissue? Our living tissue like hands and stomach require purification.

 

[lunarious]

My autistic brother Ikey lives in a group home. He hasn't been taught how to shave himself. The staff there rarely do it for him; they have the barber do it when he gets a haircut. He doesn't like having a beard, so he pulls the hairs out by hand. You'll often see him with big bald spots, which make it appear as if he has some physical disorder.

This isn't a question about the propriety of what the staff do, or about how we could intervene. What I'm wondering about is how much Ikey feels pain when he does the pulling. Does it hurt a lot, but the compulsion causes him to do it anyway? Does his desire and the distracted nature of what he is doing make him just not notice it? (It's also possible that he enjoys the pain.) Though he is verbal, he hasn't been able to answer when I've asked about it.

There's no way, of course, that anyone here knows the answer. I'm interested to see if people who do similar things have an awareness of how they experience it.

He's saying he's stronger than "the compulsion", and rebelling by self-sabotaging (edit: and yielding Honor. As Hair is strength and Honor). Since they at compulsion are agressive when Ikey speaks/feels the truth.

Basically Autism vs. Society. Both Society and Autism can agree ..on certain things.

Edit: e.g. I used to be in compulsory treatment, and they broke me, i didn't like that as they were not mine, they were strangers. So? I broke my property, spesifically Guitars, repeatedly. Rock Stars break their Guitars.

 

[Alexej]

My autistic boyfriend told me, that he feels pain differently on different days. Sometimes he's very sensitive, and just a touch makes him cringe, while on another days he broke a finger on his feet and didn't notice, on days like that he says he feels numb. So it can change from day to day.

Not being sensitive to pain is a thing.
I know of a person who had sepsis, but since their pain response was different they did not get the alarm bell that pain often is.

 

[lunarious]

Not being sensitive to pain is a thing.
I know of a person who had sepsis, but since their pain response was different they did not get the alarm bell that pain often is.

But you do not switch on or off by will. Right?

I have this physical theory, if my back gets bent and broken I can not walk again.

Edit: I have blood sickness called Thalasimiya Minor, it is prevealent in Asia or maybe spesifically The Middle East.

Edit2 reason grammar

 

[Rodafina]

He doesn't like having a beard, so he pulls the hairs out by hand.

Does it hurt a lot, but the compulsion causes him to do it anyway?

It sounds like maybe he does it because the discomfort of having a beard is greater than any pain from pulling it out. Sometimes, a certain type of discomfort is worse than pain. I am a scratcher - the pain of broken, bleeding skin is preferable to the insanely infuriating feeling of the itch.