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Pervasive Developmental Disorder

Aspieistj

Well-Known Member
Very interesting day for me today. I was perusing my online patient portal which allows me to view certain parts of my medical doctor's file on me. I have long wondered what my doctor thinks of me as a person because I have told her I have Prosopagnosia (confirmed by a Harvard PhD), and also Asperger Syndrome, confirmed only by online testing. I can't afford to pay a Psychiatrist for a formal diagnosis, am now almost 71 and retired, but I am convinced of the diagnosis. Also, I was in my early 60s when I found that any online test found me to be on the spectrum I asked my son, who had a friend from when they were in college, his opinion. He was told about me by my son and also that I can't pay for a professional diagnosis. His friend, whom I believe is a psychologist, told my son that such testing for a confirmed diagnosis is expensive and that the online tests were pretty accurate.

When I believed I was on the spectrum I told my family physician who had treated me long term for depression and occasional anxiety. She is great to talk to but has never reflected on me that she believes in my "online diagnosis." Nor has she ever urged me to seek a confirmed diagnosis. She is mostly a listener and will suggest medications if she feels they will help. I am very satisfied with this doctor. Oh, I am also a retired RN with two Masters--one in health education and the other in nursing administration. I am always a real participant in any diagnosis and treatment she suggests. She knows I often wish I could die but have never taken any real steps to take my own life. She also has prescribed Tylenol with codeine for chronic back pain and we have discussed the fact that there are times when I have enough in my house to kill myself. I have always wondered if she really believes in my emotional problems. I guess she is handling me by trusting me to ask for help when I need it. She also treats my several neurological conditions and she understands I seldom feel really well physically, so depression comes easily to me. Regarding the codeine, she simply stated that there are numerous ways for people to find to kill themselves and she knew tha as a nurse, I don't like to use codeine except for severe pain.

Anyway, today I found a list of "problems" which indicated all my medical conditions, lists 2 episodes of major depression (I knew about this) and then listed Pervasive Developmental Disorder. Wow! She must believe I am an Aspie. I was never identified as a child who had any real psychological problems, I was an early walker, talker, and always had high grades in any school I attended. I have to believe I am "high functioning" because of the educational and career accomplishments in my life. All accomplished by someone who has always been considered rude, selfish, unfeeling, and seldom included in any circle of friends. I wonder what my life might have been like if I had been diagnosed, and my idiot, always in denial of any medical or emotional problem mother, consented to some intervention to help me realize what I did to make others dislike me. Of course, I was born in 1944 and out of public school by 1962, so nobody talked about the findings of Hans Asperger back then.
 
It must have been quite a relief for you, to have your suspicions confirmed in such a way by your doctor. It's surprising what we can learn, and what we are not told about in our medical records.

I discovered fairly recently that I was diagnosed with Social Phobia back in 1991 by a psychiatrist I was seeing, and yet I was not told of this diagnosis. I wonder if he also thought I had Asperger's too? Asperger's was known about at that time, but not officially in the diagnostic manuals.
 

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