My place is a mess! I want to get organised.

[Rectify]

I've still got cardboard boxes laying around from when I moved (it's now more than a year ago). Plus I just have too much stuff. It's hard because a lot is meaningful to me but it's hard to clean because there's piles of stuff everywhere.

My house hasn't always been like this. I've had times where it much more organised. I even tried minimalism once. Lately I've just been really focused on my interests, I guess, so I've let other things go.

Anyone else want to get organised, cut down on their 'stuff', spring clean or the like? Maybe we can encourage each other or share tips that have helped with the practical side or even motivation.

I'll start with something I have found quite motivating in the past: I read somewhere that most people only wear 20% of their clothing. I found that was true for me. Some clothes are still worth keeping if they're seasonal or for special events, of course - I'm not into wasting if I can help it. But clothes still seem to multiply. I hate clothes shopping, so how does it happen?!

 

[Mia]

I do, I'm ready for this. Live in an old house that belonged to my husband's grandparents. When we moved in we had to pile boxes everywhere in towers, the house came fully furnished and we moved our things from a six and a half apartment into the place. It was chaos, it took me years to clean out the attic, closets, even the garage.

Most of the personal effects of the family, have been given out to extended family. Much of the furniture was taken by siblings because we had our own. There are still closets with material and trunks and suitcases and hundreds of photographs. Things such as aprons, decorative scarves, doilies, 78 records all have to go. I've donated some, and given away items, but there's quite a bit left.

As well, clothing that I don't like, that's uncomfortable or annoying in some way, that I haven't worn in five years has to go as well. I'll keep a few things, for special occasions, but those dresses and suits that are outdated have to go. Shoes with quite high heels as well, that I no longer wear will be given away. When I put on something that's uncomfortable, like a slightly scratchy synthetic shirt or an annoying sweater that doesn't fit well, I've taken to putting them in a bag for the charity shop and bringing them in every so often. That way I won't put them on again, and have to remember why I didn't like them in the first place.

 

[GadAbout]

It can be easier if you get someone to help you. They could be a friend or family member, or a paid organizer. I've never used a paid organizer, but I do have a young woman who helps me out with various little personal chores a couple hours a week. She will also drop giveaways at the charity shop for me. She also does my filing.

The problem with doing it alone, for me anyway, is you get so sidetracked looking at stuff instead of making decisions. Lots of trips down memory lane, and so on. I'm more distractible than I used to be.

 

[Rectify]

Oh wow @Mia that sounds like a lot to deal with. Gaining control over stuff is one of those things that compounds in difficulty the more you have. And it sounds like a lot of yours was because of your family situation changing.

I remember it feels great when you do make progress on it. Another thing I read was - if you can't get it all done at once, which is pretty likely with such a large amount - to commit to doing a bit every day. That can be hard for me. I tend to give all my focus to something then move on. But, I can work on that.

@GadAbout I think you're right. Though I have a lot of work ahead of me so I might have to tackle it myself. I can relate on getting side tracked though. I also spend too much time agonising over the decisions. What if I need this? Will I need this? blah blah.

 

[Rectify]

On a practical note I've made a start today. Mainly on more recent things that have built up on what used to be horizontal surfaces. They are more straight forward decisions to make than many, so easy wins.

 

[SolarPoweredNightOwl]

Most of decluttering and organizing really is just mental, especially decluttering. (Organizing is mostly building systems to keep your mental OUT of the equation.) I can give strategies if people want, but the mental part is most important. Decide what you need/strongly want, commit to getting rid of the excess, and most of all, keep it gone. Too many people screw it up with shopping addictions and hobbies/collections and hoarder tendencies, they get rid of a few things then promptly replace them with more junk. Avoid that trap, and the rest is just donate, sell, trash, repeat. I wish you all luck.

 

[Rectify]

Most of decluttering and organizing really is just mental, especially decluttering.

You are absolutely right. If it weren't for the difficulty mentally - making decisions, letting go etc - I could be done in half a day. But because of those things it will take sooo long. Fortunately I don't shop obsessively but I admit to my hobbies bringing in some stuff. I don't like to call it junk because it is stuff that is useful, mostly. As I get older, though, I ascribe more importance to historical things and I have to be careful there that I don't go crazy and fill my house with collections (as you mentioned ). It's a slippery slope that one.

 

[Ranunculus]

I feel this. I find myself keeping bolts and yarn because "I could still use this" even though I never use it. Same thing with wires.
My special interests seems to be getting in the way with basic things, like keeping my living space clean, because I want to germinate plants, which could produce mold, but then I wouldn't want to clean it up, because then I feel like I'm giving favoritism towards plants. I don't know if that's weird.

 

[Rectify]

I feel this. I find myself keeping bolts and yarn because "I could still use this" even though I never use it. Same thing with wires.
My special interests seems to be getting in the way with basic things, like keeping my living space clear...

Yeah at the moment my dining table has disappeared for one of my interests. But then I wonder - is a dining table that important? Though if it's a cleanliness issue it becomes more of an issue. I don't know if mine is or not :/

The worst thing for me, with keeping things because I might use them, is occasionally I do! Occasionally I put something in a box to get rid of, don't, and then six months later I think 'didn't I used to have such and such?' Then I remember where it is, go and get it, and the experience strengthens the difficulty in getting rid of most things. Argh!

 

[Ranunculus]

Yeah at the moment my dining table has disappeared for one of my interests. But then I wonder - is a dining table that important? Though if it's a cleanliness issue it becomes more of an issue. I don't know if mine is or not :/

The worst thing for me, with keeping things because I might use them, is occasionally I do! Occasionally I put something in a box to get rid of, don't, and then six months later I think 'didn't I used to have such and such?' Then I remember where it is, go and get it, and the experience strengthens the difficulty in getting rid of most things. Argh!

Exactly, it seems I only have a photographic memory when I'm looking for something, and when it's not in it's correct place (whether my place is clean or not) makes me lose it. "I swear it was right here, I can visibly see it in my mind but it's gone!"

 

[Gracey]

I'm about to start something like this. declutter

it's easier when the clutter is irritating me.
only then am I resolute. merciless.

If I'm struggling or getting distracted,
instead of making it about letting go, I try to make it about categorising or organising.
the different places the items are headed when leaving my home and what use they may be when they get there.
that sort of thing.

 

[RMX07]

I even tried minimalism once.

What stopped you from continuing with it?

I’ve always kind of been a minimalist (perhaps a response to many of the adults in my life while I was growing up who I’d consider to be hoarders), but I’ve been practicing minimalism in a big way for about a year or so now. I haven’t yet gone through every item in my house, but it’s certainly been helpful already in many ways, and we’ve donated and sold sooooo much stuff.

Minimalism makes me more intentional with everything I’m using and buying. I wouldn’t consider myself an extreme minimalist, but a practical one. I absolutely still have stuff, but it’s either stuff I use all the time (e.g. tools of the trade such as my computers or stationery items), or stuff I can admire and appreciate (e.g. collections of retro games and consoles, collector’s items from my favourite movies/games, etc). I feel this is a good and healthy middle ground that still allows me to engage with my special interests which can often revolve around stuff. My next step is to find a ‘uniform’ I like so I don’t even have to think about what to wear each day. I just want to buy a bunch of the same tshirts, jeans, and hoodies, and be done with it.

I mention this because I really believe this is the best way forward for a lot of people if they’re happy to put in a little bit of work. When sorting out stuff, asking ‘does this add value to my life?’ is a great way to decide whether to keep something or not. Aspie practicality rather than sentimentality is useful here. If someone else can make better use of something you’re not using at all... Well, to me that makes perfect sense.

Edit: Also just wanted to add that I think there’s a big difference between minimising and decluttering, so I’d always go the stoic minimalism route (or check out The Minimalists for a modern-day take) rather than the Marie Kondo decluttering route which, to me, is just like hiding the clutter rather than actually dealing with it.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

Have you heard of the 30 day minimalism game? Sounds like a good way to get started on de-cluttering.

As for all of the stuff that's still in boxes, you obviously don't need or want to use any of it, so why not just take it straight to a charity shop without unpacking it? No chance of sentimentality getting in the way then.

 

[Mary Terry]

I hate cleaning house and de-cluttering closets. My walk-in closet must have 20+ pairs of shoes and loads of clothes that I will never wear. I just need to suck it up, go in there with large plastic bags and start shoveling things into them, then dump them in the trunk of my car and drop them off at Good Will or Salvation Army. The rule should be that I dispose of anything that I have not worn in the past year. If I haven't worn it, then I don't need it. But I always stall at getting started on the task so I totally commiserate with you.

My family has 200 years of antiques, photos, books, etc. which we finally divvied up about a year ago. One sister took all the old photos because she thinks she is the self-appointed family historian which is fine with me. We don't even know who those people were other than they were ancestors.

 

[Pats]

I love re-organizing and re-decorating and that's kind of what I do here. Over and over, something is always different than it was last week. It's just what I enjoy doing. I don't have a lot of clutter but one of the things I like to do is come up with new methods of storage. For instance, instead of end tables with a lot of wasted space, I have small cube shelves that fit the ends of the couch perfectly and actually takes less space than end tables and it's storage - pretty baskets and cubes, and you can paint the shelf to match your other furniture.

 

[Pats]

My sister and I have a term we share. 'Death cleaning' - the act of going through and cleaning out your own things so your kids won't have such a burden to do so after we die. Sounds a little morbid, but we both would find ourselves doing it - especially after my dad's death where it took days with a trash dumpster to clean out his stuff.

 

[GadAbout]

As I transition into old age, my goal in downsizing has been: Don't leave a horrific mess for your heirs to go through! As I have seen how difficult this has been with the passing of my grandparents on both sides, as well as my husband's grandparents.

Having an organizing principle like this does help somewhat in the decision-making. I am somewhat sentimental, but I have channeled that into a couple of printer's drawer type wall shelves that I can put miniatures on (for instance, antique thimbles that my ancestors actually used).

I have told my siblings and cousins that I do want data, but not things - for instance, they should keep the antique furniture but I would like old letters, certificates, and photos. (I am the family historian.)

Some thirty years ago before she died, my grandmother was going through an old steamer trunk that contained her sons' WWII uniforms and other keepsakes. Some of these she doled out, other things she put back in the trunk. There was a huge mass of cotton in there, and she said "I might use this for something some day" (she was 90 at the time!) and put it back in the trunk. I try to remember this example when I contemplate keeping something of no intrinsic worth. That cotton was nuts! I don't have to be the same way!

 

[GadAbout]

My sister and I have a term we share. 'Death cleaning' - the act of going through and cleaning out your own things so your kids won't have such a burden to do so after we die. Sounds a little morbid, but we both would find ourselves doing it - especially after my dad's death where it took days with a trash dumpster to clean out his stuff.

OMG Pats, I was composing my last post before I read yours! They are almost exact parallels.

 

[Mary Terry]

My sister and I have a term we share. 'Death cleaning' - the act of going through and cleaning out your own things so your kids won't have such a burden to do so after we die. Sounds a little morbid, but we both would find ourselves doing it - especially after my dad's death where it took days with a trash dumpster to clean out his stuff.

We'll have to death clean one of these days, too. Meanwhile, I continue to water and take care of "funeral plants" from various relatives' funerals.

 

[Mary Terry]

As I transition into old age, my goal in downsizing has been: Don't leave a horrific mess for your heirs to go through! As I have seen how difficult this has been with the passing of my grandparents on both sides, as well as my husband's grandparents.

Having an organizing principle like this does help somewhat in the decision-making. I am somewhat sentimental, but I have channeled that into a couple of printer's drawer type wall shelves that I can put miniatures on (for instance, antique thimbles that my ancestors actually used).

I have told my siblings and cousins that I do want data, but not things - for instance, they should keep the antique furniture but I would like old letters, certificates, and photos. (I am the family historian.)

Some thirty years ago before she died, my grandmother was going through an old steamer trunk that contained her sons' WWII uniforms and other keepsakes. Some of these she doled out, other things she put back in the trunk. There was a huge mass of cotton in there, and she said "I might use this for something some day" (she was 90 at the time!) and put it back in the trunk. I try to remember this example when I contemplate keeping something of no intrinsic worth. That cotton was nuts! I don't have to be the same way!

I've kept some sentimental things, too. I have a bunch of old carving sets with animal horn handles, and one set has some kind of animal leg bone with the hooves attached, that I'm going to have framed in a shadow box and hang in the kitchen. I remember them well from childhood, remind me of family holiday feasts, and think they'd make an unusual wall decoration. There is also a lot of art, original paintings of value and ancient religious icons from Romania that I'm hanging on walls.