My fiancée and I have been having a lot of issues lately. Mostly to do with my social and communication issues, and my ability to put myself in her position (I cannot do so). She is growing more and more frustrated and setting more “rules” and “guidelines”. We live in different countries, she’s in the USA, I’m in Canada. She found a psychiatrist and therapist within a few days that were willing to see her in a few weeks’ time. I can’t even find any psychiatrists accepting new patients in my city, and psychologists and therapists cost money here if you’re over 17 (hers is covered under insurance). This means I cannot get the proper therapy, as my diagnosis is from childhood and my current psych can’t find it, and she is “not able to assess for, diagnose, or treat autism”. Her words, not mine.
I am not making progress, I am seeming to regress. I can barely leave my house due to fear of crowds and social interaction. I can’t shower, brush my hair or teeth, due to tactile sensitivities. I don’t eat much. I can’t sleep. I’m having a lot of issues communicating basic wants and needs (typing is easier). I want to isolate a lot more. I have issues with social skills and putting myself in my fiancée’s position and “shoes” so much so that we constantly fight whenever we talk. It’s like we avoid each other now, I sleep during the day, see her for an hour or so, and then she goes to sleep.
I’m desperate to save our relationship. I love her to death, but I’m afraid that without some sort of help or intervention, I’m going to lose the only thing that makes me want to keep going. She’s the only one that even tries to understand me. I don’t want that to be gone just because I’m so damned unable to adapt to normal people and stop being so different. No one will help me unless I have a diagnosis that is now in the DSM 5, and mine was PDD NOS and NVLD. Neither are in the new DSM. I can’t afford a new assessment. I don’t know if I feel resentment because my fiancée can so easily access services and help and all I want is the same but I can’t seem to make it happen. I need someone to do something before I wreck my relationship forever
I am not making progress, I am seeming to regress. I can barely leave my house due to fear of crowds and social interaction. I can’t shower, brush my hair or teeth, due to tactile sensitivities. I don’t eat much. I can’t sleep. I’m having a lot of issues communicating basic wants and needs (typing is easier). I want to isolate a lot more. I have issues with social skills and putting myself in my fiancée’s position and “shoes” so much so that we constantly fight whenever we talk. It’s like we avoid each other now, I sleep during the day, see her for an hour or so, and then she goes to sleep.
I’m desperate to save our relationship. I love her to death, but I’m afraid that without some sort of help or intervention, I’m going to lose the only thing that makes me want to keep going. She’s the only one that even tries to understand me. I don’t want that to be gone just because I’m so damned unable to adapt to normal people and stop being so different. No one will help me unless I have a diagnosis that is now in the DSM 5, and mine was PDD NOS and NVLD. Neither are in the new DSM. I can’t afford a new assessment. I don’t know if I feel resentment because my fiancée can so easily access services and help and all I want is the same but I can’t seem to make it happen. I need someone to do something before I wreck my relationship forever
