BrokenNeedle
I am among no one.
It's past 3:30AM as I type this, and I first started typing 90 minutes ago. I should've done this earlier because I was thinking about making this post all day and now at this hour I hope this makes sense while I wait for my sleeping pill to kick in.
First off I just logged in to see I've now been a member here for 5 years. That's cool. I'm not as active as I had planned on when creating the account. I was at a real low point when I made this account and I wouldn't say things have necessarily gotten better. I was originally going to post this in that big ranting thread, but from my understanding you aren't supposed to reply to other people's posts in there to offer advice, but I actually do want advice for this. I hope I'm posting this in the right forum section...
To start with, I live with my sister and brother-in-law. If you had asked me when I created this account 5 years ago, I'd have told you how much I despise them both for not getting me help when I desperately needed it and finally worked up the courage to ask for it. 5 years later and they still do the bare minimum when it comes to me. But I'll leave my sister out of this post, this concerns my brother-in-law.
The man is not mentally all there. He has no friends, no hobby, no job, he has 8 kiids (all adults) and all but one have written him out of their lives comletely. and he literally spends 8-10 hours of his day on the living room couch watching TikTok on his phone while my sister is the one busting her ass at work. Not to make this a political thing, but this needs to be said, so I'm gonna say it. He's a republican. Well, he's not just a republican, because there's nothing wrong with that. What he is, is the most racist, idiotic, piece of trash, toxic mindset type of republican that give the rest of republicans a bad name. For the record I'm not on either side, they're both full of liars, so my hatred of my BIL doesn't come from him being a republican, it comes from what I'm about to say next, because this was the final straw,
His toxic mindset is fueled by his TikTok algorithm because.all he watches is videos praising the orange guy and stuff that supports his racist beliefs and makes him feel like there's nothing wrong for believing what he does believe in. It is all he watches, so it is all TikTok will feed him. He's being played like a puppet without realizing it. And I'm home all day too, so I have to listen to this crap because heaven forbid he watch this stuff at a reasonable volume. No, we can't have that, it would mean he's actually thinking of someone other than himself. What was the final straw today is that he was watching yet another political video and this time for some reason it happened to be a Tim Walz video, and my BIL, so engrossed in his phone that he doesn't realize I had walked past him to go to the kitchen to get something for lunch not even 30 seconds prior (and it's an apartment, so the kitchen is practically connected to the living room), while gripping his phone tightly and staring angrily, says in a growling voice full of vitriol "the American people want you dead!"
Now, this was certainly not the first time I've heard him shouting death threats at his phone over something he saw on TikTok, but usually he has the common sense to do it when I'm not in the room (not that it matters, we're in a small apartment and no matter what room he's in I will hear every word he says because the idea of using an "in-door voice" is a foreign concept to him). This is something that has been going on for almost three years now, and my sister has no idea about it because it only happens during the hours she's at work.
Just being around this toxic piece of trash has a negative effect on my own mental health. I've heard him talk about wanting to get a CCL permit so he can buy a handgun, but I don't feel he is mentally stable enough to own a gun, and due to his short temper and being someone who literally shouts death threats at his phone, I will not feel safe under the same roof as him if he acquires one. Plus he has a felony charge from something like 30 years ago (long before my sister met him), but because it happened in a different state he has read up on it and is certain it wouldn't stop him from being able to own a gun here.
So this is where I come to you fine people for advice and suggestions. So what I am thinking is that my sister needs to be told about this. Ideally she will either get his ass put in therapy, or put parental controls on his phone to limit the amount of time he can watch TikTok He is 59 years old, this shouldn't even need to be done...
However, I am a coward and can't just bring this up without proof. I was thinking of investing in some kind of discreet microphone that I can leave by my bedroom door and just record him when I know he's watching TikTok. The living room couch is probably 15 steps or less from my door, so a microphone should be able to pick up his voice. Now, that raises a couple of questions.
1) what type of microphone is good for this?
2) is what I want to do even legal?
3) what the heck do I do if my sister doesn't even care, and she informs my BIL that I've been recording him?
And now for another question. So this town has various "blessing boxes" setup around town where people can donate food and low income families in need can just come and take what is in the boxes as needed. There are times we definitely need it, but even when we don't need it (like right now if you looked in our fridge, freezer, and pantry, you would see there's no shortage of food in them), he still drives around town to each of them to take all the food in them, and he gets legit mad if someone else beats him to it. Sometimes he will take 2 or 3 trips in one day just in case they might have been filled up since the last visit These blessing boxes are unattended, he's not breaking any law, it just relies on an honor system, and he clearly has no honor. He just thinks if he don't take it, some minority family might, and he can't sitback and let that happen. Right now he's got 5 fairly big boxes worth of excess food he has taken from these places, and we don't need it, he's taking it to give to his daughter when she visits. His daughter lives 4 hours from here, she visits maybe once per year. Those people donating food to these blessing boxes are doing it for people who live in this town, not people 4 hours away on the opposite end of the state. His daughter can find her own help locally. So, like I said, I know he's not breaking any law, but is there something/somewhere I can anonymously report to these places about what he is doing and that he shouldn't be allowed there anymore? My sister knows he does it, she doesn't care.
But again, I worry that opening my mouth might only lead to a storm of trouble, and she will side with him. I'm not independant enough to live on my own and support myself, so I can't risk something where she will tell me to get out and do nothing about what he's doing despite it being so draining on my own mental health.
First off I just logged in to see I've now been a member here for 5 years. That's cool. I'm not as active as I had planned on when creating the account. I was at a real low point when I made this account and I wouldn't say things have necessarily gotten better. I was originally going to post this in that big ranting thread, but from my understanding you aren't supposed to reply to other people's posts in there to offer advice, but I actually do want advice for this. I hope I'm posting this in the right forum section...
To start with, I live with my sister and brother-in-law. If you had asked me when I created this account 5 years ago, I'd have told you how much I despise them both for not getting me help when I desperately needed it and finally worked up the courage to ask for it. 5 years later and they still do the bare minimum when it comes to me. But I'll leave my sister out of this post, this concerns my brother-in-law.
The man is not mentally all there. He has no friends, no hobby, no job, he has 8 kiids (all adults) and all but one have written him out of their lives comletely. and he literally spends 8-10 hours of his day on the living room couch watching TikTok on his phone while my sister is the one busting her ass at work. Not to make this a political thing, but this needs to be said, so I'm gonna say it. He's a republican. Well, he's not just a republican, because there's nothing wrong with that. What he is, is the most racist, idiotic, piece of trash, toxic mindset type of republican that give the rest of republicans a bad name. For the record I'm not on either side, they're both full of liars, so my hatred of my BIL doesn't come from him being a republican, it comes from what I'm about to say next, because this was the final straw,
His toxic mindset is fueled by his TikTok algorithm because.all he watches is videos praising the orange guy and stuff that supports his racist beliefs and makes him feel like there's nothing wrong for believing what he does believe in. It is all he watches, so it is all TikTok will feed him. He's being played like a puppet without realizing it. And I'm home all day too, so I have to listen to this crap because heaven forbid he watch this stuff at a reasonable volume. No, we can't have that, it would mean he's actually thinking of someone other than himself. What was the final straw today is that he was watching yet another political video and this time for some reason it happened to be a Tim Walz video, and my BIL, so engrossed in his phone that he doesn't realize I had walked past him to go to the kitchen to get something for lunch not even 30 seconds prior (and it's an apartment, so the kitchen is practically connected to the living room), while gripping his phone tightly and staring angrily, says in a growling voice full of vitriol "the American people want you dead!"
Now, this was certainly not the first time I've heard him shouting death threats at his phone over something he saw on TikTok, but usually he has the common sense to do it when I'm not in the room (not that it matters, we're in a small apartment and no matter what room he's in I will hear every word he says because the idea of using an "in-door voice" is a foreign concept to him). This is something that has been going on for almost three years now, and my sister has no idea about it because it only happens during the hours she's at work.
Just being around this toxic piece of trash has a negative effect on my own mental health. I've heard him talk about wanting to get a CCL permit so he can buy a handgun, but I don't feel he is mentally stable enough to own a gun, and due to his short temper and being someone who literally shouts death threats at his phone, I will not feel safe under the same roof as him if he acquires one. Plus he has a felony charge from something like 30 years ago (long before my sister met him), but because it happened in a different state he has read up on it and is certain it wouldn't stop him from being able to own a gun here.
So this is where I come to you fine people for advice and suggestions. So what I am thinking is that my sister needs to be told about this. Ideally she will either get his ass put in therapy, or put parental controls on his phone to limit the amount of time he can watch TikTok He is 59 years old, this shouldn't even need to be done...
However, I am a coward and can't just bring this up without proof. I was thinking of investing in some kind of discreet microphone that I can leave by my bedroom door and just record him when I know he's watching TikTok. The living room couch is probably 15 steps or less from my door, so a microphone should be able to pick up his voice. Now, that raises a couple of questions.
1) what type of microphone is good for this?
2) is what I want to do even legal?
3) what the heck do I do if my sister doesn't even care, and she informs my BIL that I've been recording him?
And now for another question. So this town has various "blessing boxes" setup around town where people can donate food and low income families in need can just come and take what is in the boxes as needed. There are times we definitely need it, but even when we don't need it (like right now if you looked in our fridge, freezer, and pantry, you would see there's no shortage of food in them), he still drives around town to each of them to take all the food in them, and he gets legit mad if someone else beats him to it. Sometimes he will take 2 or 3 trips in one day just in case they might have been filled up since the last visit These blessing boxes are unattended, he's not breaking any law, it just relies on an honor system, and he clearly has no honor. He just thinks if he don't take it, some minority family might, and he can't sitback and let that happen. Right now he's got 5 fairly big boxes worth of excess food he has taken from these places, and we don't need it, he's taking it to give to his daughter when she visits. His daughter lives 4 hours from here, she visits maybe once per year. Those people donating food to these blessing boxes are doing it for people who live in this town, not people 4 hours away on the opposite end of the state. His daughter can find her own help locally. So, like I said, I know he's not breaking any law, but is there something/somewhere I can anonymously report to these places about what he is doing and that he shouldn't be allowed there anymore? My sister knows he does it, she doesn't care.
But again, I worry that opening my mouth might only lead to a storm of trouble, and she will side with him. I'm not independant enough to live on my own and support myself, so I can't risk something where she will tell me to get out and do nothing about what he's doing despite it being so draining on my own mental health.
