It’s over I’m d I f f e r e n T and so r u

[abby normal]

there are a lot of us on the spectrum, and there is strength in numbers.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

I’m new and I realized it over people don’t like me at all just cause I’m ugly and autistic I’m wearid and sadSOME STATISTICS:
85~90% of autistics are unemployed and will never be able to have careers,
2/3 of autistic men die without even one relationship from start to finish,
And the autism suicide rate is 15x the general population's. Everyone thinks it's okay to discriminate against autistics, there is nothing good about this disorder. Nothing will ever change because this is the way I was born. I will never find love and will never be able to connect with others like they can with each other because of this retarded disorder.
90% of autistic kids get bullied in school and one study found that 63% of all bullied kids were Aspergers

It's that sort of inward, negative, victim-like, thinking that causes much of this. As @Outdated suggests... you've got choices. Your life is what you make it... "F" my autism... and yours too. You sort of have to have this attitude of adapt and overcome... and I'm not going to take anybody's crap anymore. Out with the lamb... in with the lion. Take control.

I am one of the 10-15% that have been employed for... well, since I was 9 years old... quite literally. I've always had employment. I've been at my current job for nearly 40 years. I deal with my autism there. One thing I do know about autism in the workplace... nobody cares, quite literally. All people care about is how well you perform and what kind of co-worker you are. Nobody cares about all the sensory issues, the mental exhaustion, the social and communication issues, the physical and mental discomfort, etc. Did I perform at a high level? That's all that matters.

I am one of the 1/3 of autistic men that have been with the same woman for 40 years and raised two great young men... both very successful in their own right. I deal with my autism here, as well. My wife has gotten used to long silences and me not having the slightest clue what she is thinking. I will never "know" her... every moment is a mystery to me. It is what it is... and it's worked out pretty well despite all of that.

You know what stopped my being bullied as a kid? I went straight to the weightlifting and was the strongest kid in my high school by the time I was 15. Nobody gave me any crap. I couldn't fight my way out of a wet paper bag, but nobody was going to challenge me to find out. It gave me a lot of confidence to have a presence and be a part of life. It gave me the confidence to not shy away from women. It gave me the confidence to pursue things like a degree and a career. In my life I have seen quite a few shy, skinny, geeky young men come into the gym, put in the work, get the results, and see them open up with confidence. It's pretty cool.

At any rate, wallowing in depression and rumination about your situation, how other people treat you, etc... absolutely nothing good comes of it... in fact, it will destroy you.

Start with something simple... random acts of kindness towards others... and do not expect them to reciprocate. Most do... but do not expect it. I think that's where people get off track in their thinking... they expect something in return... they want to make it transactional. The simple act of being kind has its own internal rewards... it just makes you feel good. Start there, then reassess how many people dislike you... I think things will turn around pretty quickly. People will overlook a lot of things if you are simply a good person towards others... word will get around and attitudes will change.

The bottom line here is that everyone on this forum has their own flavor of autism, their own situation in life, their own disabilities... but we are all here to support each other. Yeah, some of us have certainly been kicked while we were down... but we got back up. You can internalize all the bad crap that happened to you as trauma and PTSD... or you can deal with it and use it as wisdom to make you stronger. Yes, sometimes we need some help with that part... and I would encourage that... but you can't let all that BS hold power over you (like it appears to be doing right now).

Welcome to the forum