Intrusive thoughts and hyper awareness

[8crismon]

I feel like the most annoying part of having intrusive thoughts is the hyper awareness of the subject topic. For me currently, it is the question of my sexuality. I am straight and after seeing a drawn picture of overly muscly dude, a stray thought of something along the lines of "am I into that?" popped into my head. Now, I am over aware of details I didn't pay attention to before. It makes me wince and tense in places I didn't know I could. Been like this for three weeks.

 

[Judge]

I feel like the most annoying part of having intrusive thoughts is the hyper awareness of the subject topic. For me currently, it is the question of my sexuality. I am straight and after seeing a drawn picture of overly muscly dude, a stray thought of something along the lines of "am I into that?" popped into my head. Now, I am over aware of details I didn't pay attention to before. It makes me wince and tense in places I didn't know I could. Been like this for three weeks.

I suspect you answered your own question, but haven't yet realized it.

Your thought being described as a "stray one". That says a lot. But just because we may occasionally imagine a different thought process or existence doesn't mean we've attained as such. At least IMO.

I don't give much thought to such a consideration on a sexual level, but occasionally purely on an aesthetic one. Bruce Lee vs. Arnold Schwarzenegger?

My bad! In essence, you are who you are whatever it may entail. Nothing wrong in that. Of course if one is on the spectrum, we also have been known for overthinking just about everything at one time or another as well.

 

[8crismon]

I suspect you answered your own question, but haven't yet realized it.

Your thought being described as a "stray one". That says a lot. But just because we may occasionally imagine a different thought process or existence doesn't mean we've attained as such. At least IMO.

I don't give much thought to such a consideration on a sexual level, but occasionally purely on an aesthetic one.

My bad! In essence, you are who you are whatever it may entail. Nothing wrong in that.

But have you experienced such a hyper awareness with an intrusive thought?

 

[Judge]

But have you experienced such a hyper awareness with an intrusive thought?

Of course. I have OCD comorbid to my autism. Though those thoughts are considerably more toxic to me. Contemplating simple situations in which my mind generates worst-case-scenarios. Happening all too often more than I'd like to admit.

This sort of reminds me of the film, "Lawrence Of Arabia" where Peter O'Toole lights a match, and then proceeds to extinguish it with his own fingers. Whereupon an incredulous soldier asks him what the trick is, given the potential pain involved.

And O'Toole answers, "The trick Michael George Hartley, is not minding that it hurts".

At least that's the way I see it. Except that I don't play with matches.

 

[Rodafina]

It makes me wince and tense in places I didn't know I could

With intrusive thoughts, it's important to remember that we can unintentionally give them the power they need to persist and become a real problem. It takes a great mental effort, but the more you can work to let the feelings about the intrusive thought go, the less frequently it will occur.

It took me many many years to learn this, and I am still working on it, but it is true. If we can let the thoughts come and go without the wincing and the tensing and the worrying, over time they will actually lessen.

I have found intrusive thoughts to be very difficult. I'm sorry you are dealing with this, but I know there is hope for managing them.

 

[Aspychata]

When l experience off the wall thoughts, l think what a storyline. Like l was watching men on YouTube who wear a prosthesis of a woman's face and sometimes chest to come out as such for a nite on the town or a day around the house. I was trying to understand what was it they were feeling? I think writing a story with all the strange thoughts would be entertaining. Just because l think about things doesn't mean l want to do it, a lot of times l am trying to understand human behavior. So l think this is a strange thought , but it goes no further because l stopped ruminating since l have been at this forum. (Most of the time)

 

[8crismon]

Of course. I have OCD comorbid to my autism. Though those thoughts are considerably more toxic to me.

Contemplating simple situations in which my mind generates worst-case-scenarios. Happening all too often more than I'd like to admit.

Do you also experience a phenomenon where you try to think one phrase and a contradictory phase pops up?

 

[Judge]

Do you also experience a phenomenon where you try to think one phrase and a contradictory phase pops up?

No, I can't say I do.

Though it reminds of the neurology surrounding those with conditions like Tourette's Syndrome. But where one may have some control as opposed to none at all in what comes out of their mouth.

 

[8crismon]

When l experience off the wall thoughts, l think what a storyline. Like l was watching men on YouTube who wear a prosthesis of a woman's face and sometimes chest to come out as such for a nite on the town or a day around the house. I was trying to understand what was it they were feeling? I think writing a story with all the strange thoughts would be entertaining. Just because l think about things doesn't mean l want to do it, a lot of times l am trying to understand human behavior. So l think this is a strange thought , but it goes no further because l stopped ruminating since l have been at this forum. (Most of the time)

I do a similar thing where the thought into a character, usually the villain, and make an end to that story; defeating the character.

 

[Rodafina]

But have you experienced such a hyper awareness with an intrusive thought?

I realize that you were asking Judge this question, but I would like to answer as well. And the answer is absolutely yes. The sort of intrusive thoughts that I have had the most trouble with are of committing violent acts against others. When I am not managing my anxiety well, I become hyper aware of any sort of blade or weapon or other dangerous object that could be used to hurt someone else. I can't help but notice them, and then the dreaded thoughts pop into my head.

Through therapy, I've been able to understand that my intrusive thoughts are all based in anxiety and in some ways, my brain is assessing every situation for safety, including the safety of others. It comes up with the absolute worst possible things that could happen (in my mind, that would be hurting another person), and then taunts my brain with that idea, telling it to be on high alert against this thing. I become hyper focused on my environment and anything in it that could be a danger to someone else through me. It's very upsetting and exhausting.

 

[8crismon]

With intrusive thoughts, it's important to remember that we can unintentionally give them the power they need to persist and become a real problem. It takes a great mental effort, but the more you can work to let the feelings about the intrusive thought go, the less frequently it will occur.

It took me many many years to learn this, and I am still working on it, but it is true. If we can let the thoughts come and go without the wincing and the tensing and the worrying, over time they will actually lessen.

I have found intrusive thoughts to be very difficult. I'm sorry you are dealing with this, but I know there is hope for managing them.

Feeling like a veteran of a 1000 psychic wars.

 

[Rodafina]

Feeling like a veteran of a 1000 psychic wars.

Ug. Very well put. So true.

 

[Aspychata]

Is this due to existing trauma and or ptsd? I went thru a stage of high alert, battered woman's syndrome. It took about 3 years to flip that thinking with a very intelligent and understanding and patient gentleman. I didn't feel violent, l was frighten that l would be harmed. I had to make peace with that thought, before l could function again. It's like a light came on, or l passed thru a door, and realized these thoughts were incorrect, and l needed to understand and process this to move forward.

 

[8crismon]

Is this due to existing trauma and or ptsd? I went thru a stage of high alert, battered woman's syndrome. It took about 3 years to flip that thinking with a very intelligent and understanding and patient gentleman. I didn't feel violent, l was frighten that l would be harmed. I had to make peace with that thought, before l could function again. It's like a light came on, or l passed thru a door, and realized these thoughts were incorrect, and l needed to understand and process this to move forward.

Thank goodness, no. Just that gremlin known as anxiety.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

I feel like the most annoying part of having intrusive thoughts is the hyper awareness of the subject topic. For me currently, it is the question of my sexuality. I am straight and after seeing a drawn picture of overly muscly dude, a stray thought of something along the lines of "am I into that?" popped into my head. Now, I am over aware of details I didn't pay attention to before. It makes me wince and tense in places I didn't know I could. Been like this for three weeks.

It is ok, intrusive thoughts I have experienced it, some wrong thought at the wrong moment which sometimes ends up embarrassing too
One of my biggest issues for me this is in my ocd is constant ruminations
Like about kids, attraction to married men or attraction to women
I always know I am not attracted to the person. Or I knew I was not gay when I was young I went through like a few months of doubt because I did not understand the rumination or intrusive thought of attraction to women but it is just ocd.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

W

With intrusive thoughts, it's important to remember that we can unintentionally give them the power they need to persist and become a real problem. It takes a great mental effort, but the more you can work to let the feelings about the intrusive thought go, the less frequently it will occur.

It took me many many years to learn this, and I am still working on it, but it is true. If we can let the thoughts come and go without the wincing and the tensing and the worrying, over time they will actually lessen.

I have found intrusive thoughts to be very difficult. I'm sorry you are dealing with this, but I know there is hope for managing them.

What helped me is to acknowledge it is ocd and not something I am purposely doing.
My old counsellor said think the thought which when they are sexual or violent that is too hard for me but acknowledging then has certainly helped that and me know I am not a bad person because of them

 

[Aspychata]

I have been on medication twice for anxiety. I did like Klonipin. That made me so happy. I cut it cold turkey.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

I have been on medication twice for anxiety. I did like Klonipin. That made me so happy. I cut it cold turkey.

I got anxiety when I escaped the abuse I was in but I cannot even have the chance to acknowledge it because there is always another battle.
I think I do have anxiety especially to do with leaving the house etc
And you know what anxiety grows with trauma.
I probably did have versions of anxiety but my life has been such a battle that I would never have a chance to stop address it and see if it persists and be gentle with my self and mind.
I used to take valium and I am not against it particularly if you have anxiety leaving the house and travelling but I still prefer natural meds and remedies

 

[Aspychata]

I got anxiety when I escaped the abuse I was in but I cannot even have the chance to acknowledge it because there is always another battle.
I think I do have anxiety especially to do with leaving the house etc
And you know what anxiety grows with trauma.
I probably did have versions of anxiety but my life has been such a battle that I would never have a chance to stop address it and see if it persists and be gentle with my self and mind.
I used to take valium and I am not against it particularly if you have anxiety leaving the house and travelling but I still prefer natural meds and remedies

I was stalked for four years by a guy who l still don't know, because the police wouldn't tell me to protect me. My path has been tough in life. But l visualize myself as a warrior, and l must slew my emotional dragons.

 

[8crismon]

With intrusive thoughts, it's important to remember that we can unintentionally give them the power they need to persist and become a real problem. It takes a great mental effort, but the more you can work to let the feelings about the intrusive thought go, the less frequently it will occur.

It took me many many years to learn this, and I am still working on it, but it is true. If we can let the thoughts come and go without the wincing and the tensing and the worrying, over time they will actually lessen.

I have found intrusive thoughts to be very difficult. I'm sorry you are dealing with this, but I know there is hope for managing them.

I often clench too hard in a private spot which I feel is cause mixed nerve responses, which causes my anxiety to flare more, causing me to clench more, resulting in a ... uh discharge which I just noticed, causing me to worry search Bing, causing my hypochondria to flicker and I think the reason I ain't flipping typing this the fact I took a Serotonin supplement earlier today.