Index of Non-Attacking Phrasing for Innocent Questions/Statements?

[Poppy98]

Have you found any good go-to phrases?





So far my best one is telling someone my intent before I get to the point,

ex."hey, I was going to invite you to join our department for lunch, do you know when you'll be done with your current work?"

The alternative tends to go like this:
Me: hey, any idea when you'll be done because--
Them: WHAT BUSINESS IS IT OF YOURS?!?! I'LL TAKE TWICE AS LONG NOW JUST TO SHOW YOU!!!

(They can be suggestions for other types of interactions too, like favors, commands, clarifications, etc.)

 

[Jeff T]

my own variation would be:

"hey, I was going to invite you to join our department for lunch, if you'd like to attend, please do!"

Doesn't force the other to try to figure out if their workload would allow them to attend, or to say NO!?

Just my $0.02

If you have to plan for a specific head count, then this wouldn't work well.

 

[Poppy98]

my own variation would be:

"hey, I was going to invite you to join our department for lunch, if you'd like to attend, please do!"

Doesn't force the other to try to figure out if their workload would allow them to attend, or to say NO!?

Just my $0.02

If you have to plan for a specific head count, then this wouldn't work well.

Yeah, that's probably true. Then it leaves the door open.


Do you have go-to's for other situations (ex when disagreeing or when supporting someone?) Do they tend to occur to you as they come up?