I finally am ready to ditch a certain somebody in my life.

[Metalhead]

With her making massive deals out of me standing up for my boundaries, and then turning around and always claiming I'm the one "freaking out" when I hold my ground, she does not deserve a solid place in my life any longer.

I told my boss to grey rock my mother if she calls the office, my boss agreed to that.

My therapist already knows what to do if my mother calls her. My mother harassed a previous therapist of mine to the point where she got a restraining order. My mother learned nothing from that, as she brags about how she almost lost her job and her freedom "because she loves me".

I am going to start by seeing what happens if I don't answer her calls for a few days. I'll send a grey rock text if she's persistant, but this needs to be gradual for it to work because she has gone full on psycho in the past when I put up boundaries for my relationship with her. And the rest of the family seriously believes she is my "number one advocate", and they believe my mother when she tells them not to take a word I say seriously. I might have to distance myself from the whole damn bunch at this rate.

 

[FayetheAspie]

What does "gray rock" mean?

 

[Chonebox]

I hope it works out for you bro.

 

[Chonebox]

What does "gray rock" mean?

It means giving as little communication as possible. It's a term I heard from narcissist videos.

 

[FayetheAspie]

It does get frustrating when someone who punches holes in the wall, screams, breaks things, can play mind games on you changing your words, a setting something different to what you asked, ect. and then the moment your tone changes the least bit accuse you of "freaking out" .

 

[Metalhead]

It does get frustrating when someone who punches holes in the wall, screams, breaks things, can play mind games on you changing your words, a setting something different to what you asked, ect. and then the moment your tone changes the least bit accuse you of "freaking out" .

When I told my mother she could not bring wine to my house, she kept on pressing the issue, saying that she did not see why I did not want wine in my house and claiming that my refusal to allow her to bring alcohol to my house was a sign I was mentally unwell.

Yes, really.

I think she has a drinking problem, too.

 

[Markness]

My mother used to get drunk off of wine and scream at everyone. She and your mother would probably be friends.

I am doing the best I can to set boundaries with my mother.

 

[Masked Man]

Does your mother have any reason to have this much presence in your life? Is she your caretaker at all (like does she handle disability benefits, etc.)?

I just wonder because it's hard for me to imagine why she thinks she should have this much influence over you. You're an adult. And that's weird that she calls your work and such. My parents would never call my work and hassle my supervisor. That's just very strange.

 

[Rodafina]

I told my boss to grey rock my mother if she calls the office, my boss agreed to that.

This is great that you took the initiative to set a boundary and correct an unhealthy dynamic where your boss interacts with your mother at all. Keep going.

 

[Metalhead]

Does your mother have any reason to have this much presence in your life? Is she your caretaker at all (like does she handle disability benefits, etc.)?

I just wonder because it's hard for me to imagine why she thinks she should have this much influence over you. You're an adult. And that's weird that she calls your work and such. My parents would never call my work and hassle my supervisor. That's just very strange.

My mother has a lot of flying monkeys, and she convinced every one of them that I have severe cognitive and intellectual disabilities.

She’s truly psycho and quite scary.

 

[Masked Man]

Does she have any financial involvement in your life at all? Because if she doesn't, and you're 100% independent, then yes, restraining order is the way to go. That's messed up.

 

[Judge]

I told my boss to grey rock my mother if she calls the office, my boss agreed to that.

About time. Well done...and a clever start. Keeping in mind the possibility of restraining orders if need be.

From what you've posted about her, I assume she will attempt to directly contact you.

Pity the rest of your family cannot perceive the concept of what passive-aggressive behavior is, and how toxic it can be for you personally regarding your mother. That it's most definitely NOT a form of advocacy as your family may think.

 

[Aspychata]

Wow, that's great to read @Metalhead . It will take a little time, but your mother has to finally respect your boundaries.

 

[Metalhead]

Does she have any financial involvement in your life at all? Because if she doesn't, and you're 100% independent, then yes, restraining order is the way to go. That's messed up.

I still owe her a couple thousand dollars from a loan a couple of years ago. I have been making monthly payments to her, but I could see her trying to take me to court for the whole thing immediately if I completely ghost her and give her a restraining order.

 

[Judge]

I still owe her a couple thousand dollars from a loan a couple of years ago. I have been making monthly payments to her, but I could see her trying to take me to court for the whole thing immediately if I completely ghost her and give her a restraining order.

Sad, but it's good you're aware of the possibilities. What legally counts is that you can vouch for each and every payment made, and on time.

 

[Masked Man]

I still owe her a couple thousand dollars from a loan a couple of years ago. I have been making monthly payments to her, but I could see her trying to take me to court for the whole thing immediately if I completely ghost her and give her a restraining order.

Maybe you can settle. But yeah, that's terrible.

 

[Metalhead]

Maybe you can settle. But yeah, that's terrible.

I made a deal with the devil, this is my reward.

 

[Chonebox]

I hope you pay off the debt quickly. Please be frugal so you can pay off the debt quickly.

 

[Metalhead]

My job isn’t paying me enough. Maybe I should start my own personal narcotics smuggling empire. It worked well for Tony Montana, right?

 

[Chonebox]

My job isn’t paying me enough. Maybe I should start my own personal narcotics smuggling empire. It worked well for Tony Montana, right?

Ok how about making videos for social media for extra income? there are people with autiusm making a live on social media. Just make sure to stay on budget. You can do it bro we believe in you.