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how love works between two apsies

regnkappa

Well-Known Member
I know a girl who is an aspie. I am myself are an aspie. We both know that we have a tendency to be obsessed with other people. That for us is love. do you get what I mean?

I dont know if that is how love "should" be. And I am satisfied with just being with the girl i am in love(obsessed) with and share time and special interest with. I dont like to go out and see the world. just being home.

What I mean is that this kinda only can work with another aspie .

did any of this make any sense to you? Any one feel free to comment on my thoughts. I might not be the best to put out in words what i mean or think but I try.
 
I don't know... imo, love is being emotionally dependent on someone, and infatuation/obsession. I think you get a high when you're around the person, but when you leave them it isn't just the polar opposite of the high you experience, it's a lot worse, and last for a lot longer. IMO, love is like a drug :/. LOL.
I think(know really) that my ex-boyfriend was obsessed with me(he admitted to stalking me and stuff), and in all honesty, it just creeped me out. Maybe if the obsession was mutual it'd be nice... But it wasn't.
I think NTs and Aspies can be obsessed with each other, but probably wouldn't share the same interests.
IMO, as an Aspie, having someone to talk to to about your interests who also shares it is pretty important but not vital. I think a relationship can work between the two, but I do think that the Aspie looses out on not being able to share their interests. IMO.
TBH, I've never really met anyone I haven't wanted time away from after a couple of hours or so. Even best friends I just don't enjoy being around for too long. So I don't see me ever feeling love, or at least, in the traditional sense.
But if we're going to not go with the traditional sense then I think everyone's sort of obligated to love people because it's almost a custom(like family members, etc.), and if we don't have any set definition for romantic love, then the term looses all credibility and becomes trite.
EMZ=]
 
Hi aspiedude, i'm not an aspie, but thought i'd post my thoughts. I understand what you're saying about being an obsessed over a person being love, I see love as an obsession in any context, or i guess I'd phrase it 'madly in love'. I don't need to be doing anything with Willow or going anywhere to feel fulfilled, spending time with her is the way i spend the majority of my time - you don't have to be an aspie to have an obsession with someone, or to reap pleasure from it.
 
I know a girl who is an aspie. I am myself are an aspie. We both know that we have a tendency to be obsessed with other people. That for us is love. do you get what I mean?

I dont know if that is how love "should" be. And I am satisfied with just being with the girl i am in love(obsessed) with and share time and special interest with. I dont like to go out and see the world. just being home.

What I mean is that this kinda only can work with another aspie .

did any of this make any sense to you? Any one feel free to comment on my thoughts. I might not be the best to put out in words what i mean or think but I try.

Having been in an AS-AS relationship before, I can say that one should always work around the other person's quirks whenever possible, while at the same time, feeling free to do his/her own thing.
 
I'm not sure 2 aspies work together. Maybe at the start, but ugh. I don't think relationships are for me. I always want more. I'm driven to get the next best thing.
 
I know a girl who is an aspie. I am myself are an aspie. We both know that we have a tendency to be obsessed with other people. That for us is love. do you get what I mean?

I dont know if that is how love "should" be. And I am satisfied with just being with the girl i am in love(obsessed) with and share time and special interest with. I dont like to go out and see the world. just being home.

What I mean is that this kinda only can work with another aspie .

did any of this make any sense to you? Any one feel free to comment on my thoughts. I might not be the best to put out in words what i mean or think but I try.

the only time i really ever can be around another person is if we both have autism

i am gay and need to find how to know if he wants to date me

when we are both together he always wants to hug and kiss and have me hold him and do not know if this is him trying to date me or what and if he does want to date then how

so far all i can find for dating is about things for people that do not have autism and things usually do not mean the same for us as these books and internet advice pages tell

i want to date him but do not know how to date or even know if he is trying to date me to know if should try to date him
 
Ask him. I know it might sound intimidating, but just be upfront and ask him when he wants to kiss you or w.e, '<Name>, is there any chance you like me?' or something.
I agree though. There needs to be more advice for AS-AS relationships. Advice is impossible to get in them. It really is :/.
I've been in two AS-AS relationships though, and the situations have been completely different.
I do think AS-AS relationships can work, but I don't think they're any easier than AS-NT relationships.
But when they do work I think they're amazing.
EMZ=]
 
Ask him. I know it might sound intimidating, but just be upfront and ask him when he wants to kiss you or w.e, '<Name>, is there any chance you like me?' or something.
I agree though. There needs to be more advice for AS-AS relationships. Advice is impossible to get in them. It really is :/.
I've been in two AS-AS relationships though, and the situations have been completely different.
I do think AS-AS relationships can work, but I don't think they're any easier than AS-NT relationships.
But when they do work I think they're amazing.
EMZ=]

he does not tell people things so after thinking i think he actually does want to be my boy friend and so i guess we are dating and the always hug and kiss can be his way of asking me

i like him a lot so i guess i just hug and kiss back to tell him i want to date him too
 
It doesn't work like that though...
You have to say something or you actually aren't dating. That's the truth.
It'd be awesome if it did work like that.
But it doesn't.
EMZ=]
 
It doesn't work like that though...
You have to say something or you actually aren't dating. That's the truth.
It'd be awesome if it did work like that.
But it doesn't.
EMZ=]

it could work this way with him since i know him and he does not tell people things and the just doing of hug and kiss me all the time can be the only way he knows how to ask
 
I'm not sure 2 aspies work together. Maybe at the start, but ugh. I don't think relationships are for me. I always want more. I'm driven to get the next best thing.
It depends really? Sometimes it can be bad and scary and sometimes it can turn out good like most of the ones that I have heard about.
Especially this one i've found.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhGGXZOD7Dg[/youtube]

Why can't mine be like that ^^ <_< ?
 
Aspiedude, it IS how love should be. When you are obsessed with them because they arouse you and make you feel so much better; you are obsessed with their perfection at making you feel better, their tact, their intelligence.
 

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