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Disabled Have The Right To Date Too!

The Penguin

The Penguin

Chilly Willy The Penguin
I remember a person I once dated worked with people with disabilities and she told me they have the right to date too. I totally agree with her. It is sad though people in that category have less odds to have a date.

I had a few online relationships with a person with a disability. The person was in a wheelchair. The more I learned about her, the more I forgot she in a wheelchair. This didn't matter to me. She had a great personality and there were many other things I loved about her.

Being with someone with a disability does not mean you can't have a love live with the person. You just need to be creative and have fun in other ways.

I also dated someone who was hearing impaired. This was a person that did meet in person and dated for about a year. She was worried about love life as she takes off her aids during that moment, but it was not and issues at all. We can use eye contact and other ways to communicate.

Dating someone with a disability wouldn't be my first pick, but I have no issues dating someone who has a disability.
 
It would certainly not disqualify anyone from my friend list just because **** happened and they lost a limb or use of one, or a sense like sight or hearing. My picky nature is entirely devoted to behavior and personality and intelligence.
 
Of course they have, and disabilty can go as far as having AS, to being in a wheelchair, blind and whatever you have going on.

However, from personal experience; be aware what you're getting yourself into. In hindsight, I might've thought twice about my previous relationship, since it brought along a totally new pile of issues, that I clearly (again; in hindsight) couldn't really use in my life. In the past 2 weeks, since we've separated, it has become much clearer how demanding i was for me. It is not to say it wasn't fun for the few years it lasted though
 
I know for some people it might be too much for them. Each person can be different. There many people say to me I have lots of patience but sometimes with patience there can be rewards.
 
Ereth said:
Why not?

You say you're okay with people with disabilities, but why shouldn't they "be your first pick"?
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Maybe I should have said normally it wouldn't. Each case can be different. However, as I wrote I had dated people with disabilities.
 
Then please tell me what it is about somebody with a disability that puts you off.
 
Ereth said:
Then please tell me what it is about somebody with a disability that puts you off.
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Well if I meet two great women at the same time, I might choose the person without the disability. But there also could be a case there something about the person with the disability I like more than the one that does not have one. Each case can very.
 
When I was in my 30's I dated someone who was deaf from birth. It was the most beautiful experience and one I replay often, I wish I'd known about being an aspie then, it might have averted the pain I ended up bringing to the relationship.
 
When I was single, I was willing to date someone with a disability presuming I was attracted to them. However, I would have considered a relationship only if the disability did not preclude sex later on. Colour me shallow, but that was important to me. This didn't apply to dating, however, because you can't make presumptions about this based on a person being in a wheelchair for example. Some people are wheelchair-bound but fully capable of engaging in a full range of intimate activity allowing for reasonable accommodations. That is fine by me, but you have to date a person a while before you can ask about those sorts of things. Hence why I would date anyone but would not get too serious (relationships) with someone who I knew there was no long-term potential.
 
I get that people may not be attracted to someone with a disability, or may have concerns about whether he or she can be physically intimate. But I hope that these decisions aren't made because of someone's disability. That's just selfish.

I speak as someone with cerebral palsy who endured years of ostracism for it, including comments about how ugly and unattractive I was.
 
Ereth said:
I get that people may not be attracted to someone with a disability, or may have concerns about whether he or she can be physically intimate. But I hope that these decisions aren't made because of someone's disability. That's just selfish.

I speak as someone with cerebral palsy who endured years of ostracism for it, including comments about how ugly and unattractive I was.
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I hope with my last comment you understood I don't have issues with people with disabilities. You need to remember I created this post supporting people with disabilities have the right to date. Furthmore I did gave examples of relationships I been in. I did enjoyed the relationship while it lasted. Yes there are others do have issues with it but i am not one of those people.
 
Ereth said:
I get that people may not be attracted to someone with a disability, or may have concerns about whether he or she can be physically intimate.

But I hope that these decisions aren't made because of someone's disability. That's just selfish.
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I don't understand the distinction you are drawing here (and I only think you meant to draw a distinction). Don't take this the wrong way, but what precisely did you mean here?

I am guessing you meant that not dating someone because of lack of attraction or an inability to be physically intimate are legitimate but that otherwise it is not okay to generally discriminate against dating all people somehow "disabled." If that is what you meant, then I agree.

Ereth said:
I speak as someone with cerebral palsy who endured years of ostracism for it, including comments about how ugly and unattractive I was.
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That sucks. I mean, beauty is a subjective thing, so none of us has the standing/qualifications to accurately gauge what is beautiful or what is ugly. Those people may have thought you were ugly, but that doesn't make it so. They don't get to decide what the rest of us think or what you think, and they're assholes for thinking they're the arbiters of what is and is not pretty.
 
icesyckel said:
I am guessing you meant that not dating someone because of lack of attraction or an inability to be physically intimate are legitimate but that otherwise it is not okay to generally discriminate against dating all people somehow "disabled." If that is what you meant, then I agree.
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Yes, this is what I mean. Obviously it's a damn shame if someone can't look past a person's inability to be physically intimate (especially in this day and age, where there are ways around the problem), but as long as he or she isn't cruel about it, I get it.

That sucks. I mean, beauty is a subjective thing, so none of us has the standing/qualifications to accurately gauge what is beautiful or what is ugly. Those people may have thought you were ugly, but that doesn't make it so. They don't get to decide what the rest of us think or what you think, and they're assholes for thinking they're the arbiters of what is and is not pretty.
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It's all right. I got over all that long ago. :)
 
My husband has had Type 1 diabetes since he was a kindergartener. Some call it a disability, some call it a nuisance. I guess it depends on the severity since those with amputated limbs do qualify for disability income. It actually made him more attractive to me because I have some light issues with sugars and carbs anyway (we're thinking I'm something along the lines of reactive hypoglycemic) so it was awesome that we could share the same diet and not worry about me not being understanding of his needs since he has to be careful with sweets and stuff, or him calling me a vain little peacock because I'm wary of sweets and stuff. Aside from him, I've never known anybody within my dating age range with a physical disability. I can't honestly say how it played into my dating preferences. But I do know if his diabetes takes a nasty turn, I won't abandon him. Although I may put flame decals on his wheel chair and make jokes about his mean ol' wife pushes him around. Gotta try to keep his spirits up, I am the jester of the family. ;)
 
AsheSkyler said:
But I do know if his diabetes takes a nasty turn, I won't abandon him. Although I may put flame decals on his wheel chair and make jokes about his mean ol' wife pushes him around. Gotta try to keep his spirits up, I am the jester of the family.
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No matter what happens, I'm sure your husband knows he's very lucky.
 
Ereth said:
Yes, this is what I mean. Obviously it's a damn shame if someone can't look past a person's inability to be physically intimate (especially in this day and age, where there are ways around the problem), but as long as he or she isn't cruel about it, I get it.

It's all right. I got over all that long ago. :)
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Btw, on a different note, I am a huge Batman TAS fan.
 
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