Autism and employment

[Kevin L.]

Oh no, that’s a horrible story! I’m so sorry that happened to you. It saddens me that people can be that narrow-minded to be upset about the perceived sexual orientation of the person saving their kid’s life, rather than being thankful for the timely help. Terrible.

I don’t feel like you treaded on their beliefs if they never spoke up about their discomfort. It’s not your job to guess whether your patient’s parents are bigots, it’s your job to care for your patients. Yes, bedside manner matters, but in an acute crisis it’s not at the top of your priority list. I’m really appalled about all of this. Even more that your superiors didn’t back you up.

One point I forgot to mention is that I have trouble with body language, subtext, and so forth, as I am--after all--autistic. I possibly created the impression that I was ignoring their discomfort . . . so mea culpa.

 

[Bolletje]

If--however--I ran on a Black man from the islands--with symptoms of an M.I.--whom happened to be wearing dreadlocks, then I'd get excoriated for giving him morphine, as I was "turning him into a drug addict." I was hurrying along the slippery slope process that started with him using marijuana.

That’s terrible. From your stories, it seems to me you are working in a very conservative area. I know things like these still happen, but hearing from someone that has first hand experience with it is quite something else.

 

[Kevin L.]

That’s terrible. From your stories, it seems to me you are working in a very conservative area. I know things like these still happen, but hearing from someone that has first hand experience with it is quite something else.

Thank you.

My issue still remains how to have the insight to negotiate these barriers to me maintaining my employment.

These issues have even led to violence.

I was working as a pharmacy technician in a retail drug store while I was in paramedic school. This was great, as I had a pharmacist to help me learn my medications.

In any case, the store had a policy that customers aren't allowed to use the restroom.

I broke the rules when I had an elderly man come in to pick up his diabetes medicine, and he was desperate for a restroom because diabetes makes you pee more often.

I get pulled aside by the manager, and threatened with suspension and the possible loss of my job because I violated policy.

In any case, about 2 weeks goes by, and a pregnant woman comes in to pick up her perscription prenatal vitamins, and begs to use the restroom . . . and I tell her "No, but maybe the manager can help you."

She runs out of the store while sobbing . . . and her biker/construction worker husband is waiting for me when I get off work, and he pounds me into a pulp (I lost a tooth over this), and everyone was unanimous in declaring me at fault because "we never refuse a restroom to a pregnant woman."

When I brought up the elderly man with his diabetes, I was told that this is a different situation, so I was being passive-aggressive by deliberately misinterpreting my instructions . . . because there's a difference between an elderly man with diabetes and a pregnant woman when it comes to using the restroom. If I need to have everything spelled out for me, then I'm too stupid to keep the job.

This happens all the time, and I don't know how to fix it.

 

[Matthias]

I agree, and I have utilized this stratedgy in prior jobs. I have to figure out how to approach my boss with this idea of clarification, as he has a dictatorial management style, and he gets intensely angry when people question his policies . . . which--in his mind--is the same thing as challenging his authority.

I think most bosses would see repeatedly asking for clarification as challenging their authority since most rules are intended to be simple and easy to understand. It would be better if you put yourself in your employer's shoes by pretending you were in charge and then asking yourself why they might have created those rules. Asking your co-workers might be better than asking your boss but it's likely they'll get annoyed that you couldn't figure it out on your own.

 

[Gift2humanity]

For me, autism and employment - not happenin'
When ready Autism and self-employment - now ya talkin'

 

[risk]

Follow the rules to the letter else ask for reform

 

[Thinx]

The points already been made by @Bolletje that you appear to be in a very conservative area. There actually may not be anything much you can do therefore, because of that. I am in awe of what you have already achieved and that you have kept your job and survived so far. Clearly you have great medical skills.

There are areas in the UK where there can be very oppressive and conservative approaches still in operation. For example in recent history it was more or less impossible for someone who was gay to get trained as a teacher in the strongly catholic Liverpool area. Then there's been the recent controversy in Yorkshire over racism in sport, specifically cricket but I think it reflects general attitudes of conservatism and lack of willingness to embrace diversity.

In the above situations, the person would be able to progress in most areas of the UK so much more easily, but would be constantly discriminated against to the point of being barred from progression unless they changed to fit in with discrimatory practices, in certain areas where conservatism of this kind was still dominant.

So my best advice would be, look for a transfer or to train and work elsewhere. Or if not possible to transfer while training, to do so as soon as qualified. You say it's you and not them, but that's not the full story. It's partly that you are in a conservative area.

 

[Kevin L.]

The points already been made by @Bolletje that you appear to be in a very conservative area. There actually may not be anything much you can do therefore, because of that. I am in awe of what you have already achieved and that you have kept your job and survived so far. Clearly you have great medical skills.

There are areas in the UK where there can be very oppressive and conservative approaches still in operation. For example in recent history it was more or less impossible for someone who was gay to get trained as a teacher in the strongly catholic Liverpool area. Then there's been the recent controversy in Yorkshire over racism in sport, specifically cricket but I think it reflects general attitudes of conservatism and lack of willingness to embrace diversity.

In the above situations, the person would be able to progress in most areas of the UK so much more easily, but would be constantly discriminated against to the point of being barred from progression unless they changed to fit in with discrimatory practices, in certain areas where conservatism of this kind was still dominant.

So my best advice would be, look for a transfer or to train and work elsewhere. Or if not possible to transfer while training, to do so as soon as qualified. You say it's you and not them, but that's not the full story. It's partly that you are in a conservative area.

Thank you.

 

[Rasputin]

Hi Guys:

I recounted parts of my work issues in other threads when it comes to following rules and policies at work, and a friendly co-worker (whom is aware of my autism) has tried to help me . . . and I'm having difficulty understanding his advice.

Basically, I've often been fired from jobs because I'm meticulous about following the rules (as I've indicated in other threads).

My co-worker compared my adherence to rules and policies to someone whom follows stupid laws that are still on the books . . . for example, there is a law in New York City which states that you have to get out of your car and fire your pistol in the air before turning left or right at an intersection, or another law in Alabama which states that when you beat your wife for "home correction," you must not use a stick that's thicker than your thumb.

I'm sure that we've all heard of similar laws from talk show hosts and late-night comedians . . . and my co-worker compares my tendency to follow workplace rules and procedures to a person who follows these kind of out-dated laws despite these laws being stupid and dangerous (such as firing your pistol in the air while turning at an intersection). So . . . when I meticulously follow the rules, I'm being passive-aggressive. Speaking for myself, I can't stand dealing with passive-aggressive people at work (or anywhere else, for that matter). When people meticulously follow rules, it's often called "working to rule," which is considered a form of passive-aggressive behavior that's used to protest workplace inequalities.

How does one decide which policies to follow and which ones to ignore . . . with the idea that I don't want to be perceived as passive-aggressive? I don't feel comfortable simply copying someone else's work behavior, because I seem to see a lot of people who don't do their jobs.

Also, the time and energy that I would spend worrying about how everyone else is doing their job should be more properly channeled into me doing my job. Also, I have a little voice in my head which says that just because someone else doesn't do their job doesn't mean that I shouldn't do my job.

My co-worker may actually be right about how I'm perceived as a passive-aggressive a----hole because I follow the rules.

How do I figure out which rules should be neglected?

Any input would be appreciated. Thank you very much for your time.

See below for what I mean by "working to rule."

Baltimore Teachers Union

I don’t really have a good answer, but when I was 40-something years younger I would emulate others that I connected with to fit in. The co-worker who is trying to help you is a good candidate. Maybe have a friendly chat with him, thank him for helping, and let him know you would like to follow the example he sets and the advice he offers.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

Your issue is more common than you think among us Aspies, I have spent most of my life dealing with this life is ambiguous you must learn to deal with it.

 

[Kevin L.]

Your issue is more common than you think among us Aspies, I have spent most of my life dealing with this life is ambiguous you must learn to deal with it.

Thank you.