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UberScout

UberScout

V.I.P Member
Please Don't Be Mad At Me 02/09/1996 28
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  • UberScout
    turn me on dead man, turn it off
    tree
    tree
    Is that a reference to the ancient "Paul is dead" thing, regarding
    the Beatles? Or what?
    UberScout
    Suicidal thoughts cleared after sleep.New alignment: Neutral Evil.

    I can no longer tolerate how toxic my family is. They only have negative things to say both to me and about me. They are never happy with me. My mother has successfully pushed me into evil.
    UberScout
    Critically suicidal
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    There's no getting out of here, cartoonist. My mental stability does not matter in this house anymore.

    I *must* give my hand to the dark side. It is the only way to survive now.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    @Aspychata I wish I didn't have to be part of life so that my autism would stop making me constantly depressed and frustrated with never having money we need to get things we need or want. There's no variety anymore, everything's just monotonous and boring. And that's my life now. I almost killed myself yesterday morning but SOMEBODY stopped me.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    I hit deadends too in my life. People seem to let us down, and it hurts. It doesn't matter who, sometimes support disappears. Glad you decided to stay healthy.
    UberScout
    Oasis Activity:

    Aloe: "Violet... I hope you know what you're doing with Tyler."
    Violet: "Cousin, I got this. Don't worry about Ty."
    Me: "Violet... Can you teach me darkness?"
    Violet: "My dear, sweet child... that's what I do."
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Violet: "Show me what you've learned... furball..."
    (He cups his hands together, and instead of a normal, blue psi ball forming, it is instead reddish-purple.)
    Violet: "I've taught you well."
    Aloe: "Tyler... be careful with that...!!"
    Tyler: "Oh don't worry. I know what I'm doing, Aloe."
    (He grins wide. There are shark teeth where his human teeth used to be.)
    UberScout
    Me playing Alone in The Dark:

    *le me checking a closet for ammo & health kit*
    Game: lol ima turn the music off real quick
    Me: Boi if you don't g--
    *floor noises*
    Also me: *opens door*
    Zombie: yo I need directions
    Me: @@@@@@@###$#@!!!$!@@#%#!!@#@
    UberScout
    NOW I'm not allowed to do ANYTHING downstairs while they're sleeping. That's it. I'm going rogue.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Are you able to get out of the house and do things on your own? Can you drive or take Ubers or public transportation somewhere?
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Realistically yes I am able to get out of the house, I have been this whole time, I just exaggerate when I'm upset (that's the *issues* I have with anger/stress/ptsd). I just don't have my own mode of transportation, plus I've got sciatica and my feet go numb + legs go stiff if I walk too long.

    But that's why God gave us Minecraft.
    UberScout
    Aeshma, what have you done to me?!
    tree
    tree
    Aeshma - Wikipedia
    megamitensei.fandom.com

    Aeshma

    Aeshma is a demon in the series. Aeshma (Aēšma) is the Younger Avestan name of Zoroastrianism's demon of "wrath," with his wrath being mainly directed towards the cow. As a hypostatic entity, Aeshma is the personification of violence, with himself being the lover of war and conflict. Along with...
    megamitensei.fandom.com megamitensei.fandom.com

    ??
    UberScout
    UberScout
    There's no doubt in my mind anymore. I've got a demon.
    UberScout
    I hate having mood swings.
    L
    Luca
    Me too. I hate crying for no reason.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Stability feels so important and it gets really hard when we do not have that.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Stability?! What's that?! I've only ever heard about that on TV!!!
    UberScout
    Night #x I was locked outside for arguing. AND threatened with violence for the millionth time. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH. THE NEXT TIME, *I'LL* BE THE FIRST TO STRIKE, and I'LL BE THE ONE MAKING MADDOG A BLOODY MESS, NOT ME.

    THEY WANT A "WILD ANIMAL"? THEY WANT A "THIEF"?! They've got one!! I'm sick, tired and EXHAUSTED trying to clear my name every damn day! I'm burnt on it!! If I'm do evil, then LET ME BE EVIL!!
    UberScout
    Guess what the latest new rule is? I'm not allowed to swear. 27 years old, of legal age to drive a car if I wanted to, legally old enough to breed horses if I wanted to. YET I AM NO LONGER PERMITTED TO USE LANGUAGE THAT MAKES UP 1% OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE SPOKEN BY %99.99 OF THE WORLD'S POPULATION, WHO MOST LIKELY WOULDN'T CARE ANYWAY. I AM GOING TO STAB THESE PEOPLE.
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    @tree I just get yelled at and told not to do it like I'm not allowed to do literally everything else I've been allowed to for the better part of a DECADE

    @Luca If you were roommates with me in my house you'd go insane like I have too.
    L
    Luca
    I wish there was a simple way to get you out of that situation, UberScout. You don't deserve such an awful family.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    How often are you able to get out of your house and do things on your own?
    UberScout
    One day I'll figure out these ups and downs.
    View previous comments…
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Remember that they are temporary and any bad feelings they cause will go away. 72 hours, tops. Water, distraction, Aloe. Advil for the headaches.

    Bushcraft and fresh air could help.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Actually i found the problem...

    I just had to visit the W.C.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Hey, whatever works!
    UberScout
    It is official: I now have a phobia of possums.
    Outdated
    Outdated
    All possums or just some kinds? If you feel up to it try a search for Pygmy Possums and Ring Tailed Possums.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    The kind that sitter around under a bush next to your house and wait till you're looking for something you dropped outside to hiss at you from a tree branch.
    tree
    tree
    UberScout
    Wow. For once I actually got to do a full length wake n bake after getting up. My man stick brought me some Herb last night and it's.some of the best he's ever gotten me. Hehe.... Aloe's giggling at me...
    UberScout
    This day is really turning around! Easter went from crappy to happy soon as my man Stick rolled up! Now Playing - MAD RAT DEAD OST: Heart's Dream ((️Fever Mode️))
    UberScout
    Was playing Minecraft earlier, thinking about our old cat Mittens (very sad story).... I went back to the village near my base, still thinking about her, when out of nowhere I heard a meow. I looked around and found a cat (well, "ocelot" according to the game) with the kind of fur color and pattern Mittens had; raincloud gray on top, white on bottom. I just looked at it, and it just looked at me...
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Something told me to open chat and say "I'm sorry for what happened Mittens, I love you", and it walked up to me and sat down...

    I think there's more to Minecraft than just infinite possibilities now. And I'm starting to think one of those possibilities is that one of the mysterious ways God works in, could be these blocky worlds I walk through every day...
    UberScout
    As bad as my depression is (not to mention chronic), idk if it's Aloe looking out for me or God, but I had no idea there was a really strong resin ball hiding in my pipe! (Yes I know I'm a "junkie" for getting high, it just works :p )
    UberScout
    Boredom has now become depression. Having to do without a game console or a power cord for my computer, having to constantly pass my phone to Maddog so he can play Poker or slots, stuck with nothing to do but write or draw on notebook paper... I've been doing this since the end of Christmas and every time it looks like it's going to stop being that way, I'm ALWAYS wrong.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I guess some people are just meant to be bored and depressed their whole life. Whatever. I'm too used to it to care otherwise, and trying to fix it or find a way to be happy is just... exhausting now. Honestly... I'd much rather just stay in bed and sleep through my whole life at this point.
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