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Recent content by jtab7800

  1. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    It gets even worse. Now we're likely about to lose our only source of income because of who is in the White House now. If that happens, then we're homeless, and we lose everything. It just keeps piling on, and no one wants to help us. We're screwed, with no way out. If God exists, then he's...
  2. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    I don't know if anyone will see this, but I was right. 2026 will not be any better. Only worse. Do you remember me mentioning our Yorkie, Maxx, who has a large tumor in his abdomen? We took him in for surgery today, and before the surgery, the vet did some more tests, and told us that it's...
  3. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    In my last post, I made a huge mistake in forgetting to complete a sentence, leaving a comma at the end of it. I meant to say that I got up this morning having an anxiety attack, and I didn't think I'd be able to have my guitar teacher over here today, and when I started feeling a little better...
  4. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    I got up this morning having an anxiety attack, and I didn't think I'd be able to have my guitar teacher over here today, and she has an angry reaction to it, . She has to fill out her payroll documents so she can get paid, and she thinks that hearing the voices of my guitar teacher and I would...
  5. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    And there's another thing. One of the things I do is write songs, with the hope that I can perform them. My mother, without asking me first, gave one of my songs to a guy who has a home studio, and he wrote the music for it, and sent a recording to us. I was not allowed any involvement in...
  6. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    I don't know if anyone there could help, or understand someone who is autistic, because I really need help with my mother and her hardened-up attitude about everything. It gives off the impression that she's using that hardness as some sort of shield, and it's literally taking a toll on my...
  7. jtab7800

    My road in life might be close to a dead end

    I hope that this is the right place for this post. My life keeps looking like it’s less and less worth living. The misery in my life has gone on for too long, and it just keeps pushing me, especially when my mother callously downplays it at all times, and tells me that I’ve always had what she...
  8. jtab7800

    Will my life ever be worth living?

    I haven't been on here since around June, but it feels longer than that. And things have gotten a lot worse. My mother underwent a CT scan to see if she actually does have COPD in her lungs, and that's not as bad as she feared, but the CT scan showed an aortic aneurysm, and she waited a month to...
  9. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    In my reply to Rodafina, in the part where I typed "After my favorite guitarist, Eddie Van Halen, passed away, I learned that, in a way, he and I had something in common. When he and his brother, Alex Van Halen, came to the USA from the Netherlands when they were kids in the 1960s, all they had...
  10. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    Come to think of it, I think I do feel like I'm not in control, and that I can't make changes happen. I'm not sure what online resources you might be talking about. I wish I could get creative with ways to find and utilize support online. I've searched before, and have had a hard time finding...
  11. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    Actually, I am older than 30.
  12. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    I've never run away from home before, but I have thought about living in a different place before. There are things I would have to learn in order to do that. When I was in school, I had teachers who said that they thought I was a fast learner. That made me wonder if I was. I read the lyrics in...
  13. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    Thank you.
  14. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    Thank you. I hope there is light at the end of the dark tunnel that I've spent so much time walking in.
  15. jtab7800

    I feel like it's time for me to lay down and give up on everything

    She has wondered if I need to go back on it. The last time I was on an anti-depressant, it screwed with my head in ways that I do not want it to again. I don't know why it did that.
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