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Recent content by hithere

  1. H

    Are people on the spectrum judgemental toward others?

    I think being judgmental comes from a place within where we don't understand other people, for real, and we might ourselves have a bad day, not feeling good. I don't think it has anything to do with if you are autistic or not.
  2. H

    Devastating breakup - Did he hide the Asperger's?

    Sorry for all the pain you are going through. I am neurotypical, my husband is autistic. I once said something that had to do about our relationship, a milestone, something symbolic. It backfired. Turns out he had planned already in his head when the time was for this and by me bringing it up...
  3. H

    Direct eye contact when interacting with NTs

    I have family members I suspect are on the autism spectrum and know are. A child has told us that does not like looking people in the eye, is the worst when to stand in front of the class and the teacher has especially told this child it has to try to look it's classmates in the eye more...
  4. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    That is too how it is with my husband's parents!, They do not like expression of love in a physical sense or seem to need it the way I do, although I think the one who needs it less is the one parent I suspect is autistic. I think the other parent is right in it's opinion that my husband is like...
  5. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Yes I agree that unfounded jealousy is my problem and my problem alone. and if I suffer from it make him suffer for it which is not fair which is why I have tried to withdraw to figure myself out when I get like that because I do not want to say something i will later regret, but that too has...
  6. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Yes, that is what I think it is. As him flirting with others or cheating with others was before the last thing on my mind, I would never think that of him I have thought back to when it was exactly that I began to get insecure and worried and I know it was this one time when a woman was around...
  7. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    LOL. I have noticed he tries to stay away as much as he can from any hugs or shaking hands and before I thought it was him acting as if he was Mr cool but then I realized once we got the results that he was autistic that this was a social cue he did not know or cared for. There are other social...
  8. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Thank you still Hypnalis, I think you're right about everything you have written here, I am stuck in my own NT-head and have a long way to go before I start to reason the way I ought to and have worked up the skills. Yes what I want is an equal relationship and to understand and to communicate...
  9. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Thank you for sharing. There has been incidents too at his work. I had before taking him to a work function where I was working at the time and I thought I did a good job introducing him and not making him feel like an outcast, but still with me behaving that way, and him had to see in my...
  10. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Yes true that is my love language but it was something I always took for granted, to me I think I am somewhere where I am not so much of it (physical) but more less than average around others; but even so it was too much for his taste, he had a firm idea that no touching. I had one parent who...
  11. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Thank you a bunch for explaining and using examples, made me smile about the John quote; God, I see that with my husband and his parent. His other family members has acted on the behalf of him on a few occasions where they see an upcoming missed out social cue that would evoce humiliation and...
  12. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Yes that is where I think we have failed in the past. He has always opinions on things that I may not have made an opinion of just yet and he has run things his way and as it could be about things that did not really matter to me we would not have much of a discussion of it. His other parent...
  13. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Yes thank you and too for describing your own situation; makes me understand it more. My husband has said to me too that I couldn't have that bad of a self esteem could I. I did not have it before but with accumulating events taking place over the years I finally thought I am either too...
  14. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    That sound like a wonderful idea, he has before told me we have got to do something just the two of us, but often other things come in between but just me knowing he wants to spend time with me alone is good, we'll see when we will do it.
  15. H

    Social cues and jealousy

    Hi Hypnalis, thank you for replying and the advice. Yes I can take it, criticism, and from different perspective, absolutely! God I wrote much before, and then I had to take off, so I suppose I did not finish it right. At least now I don't think I did. I agree with you. It all escalated after...
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