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Recent content by Beanfinity

  1. Beanfinity

    Recovering from burnout - re-entering the realm of socializing

    @paloftoon These are great suggestions, thank you! I will definitely look into these type of things. I am not in the US, I am in Canada, but I'm moving to Mexico soon to be with family, so it's kind of a moot point lol
  2. Beanfinity

    Recovering from burnout - re-entering the realm of socializing

    Hi @paloftoon Thanks for the advice! Do you have any examples of activities like that, little commitment and can leave day of?
  3. Beanfinity

    Recovering from burnout - re-entering the realm of socializing

    Hi @Outdated Thank you for the insight. I want to keep pressing and say, 'but no, there must be a way to unmask and get along!', but I see what you mean. I am most comfortable when I am not socializing at all, which is integral to forming any kind of relationship. It follows that if you don't...
  4. Beanfinity

    Recovering from burnout - re-entering the realm of socializing

    Hi @AspieChris Funny you describe it this way, I always thought of it as a series of 'if-then' statements, or branches of choices based on what input I get from the other person. If they ask how my day was, and they are this level of friend, then I have these three choices to respond with. If...
  5. Beanfinity

    Recovering from burnout - re-entering the realm of socializing

    Hi @Kaz2012 Thank you for sharing, this helps a lot! It does make me feel better to hear about other people's experiences. I am sorry to hear about the loss of your relationship. I am in a similar situation as you, my partner and I split up a month ago (although, my 5yrs does not compare to...
  6. Beanfinity

    Recovering from burnout - re-entering the realm of socializing

    A year ago was when I came to realize my autism-ness and also realized I was in the deep trenches of a burnout. I didn't know what I had been doing was masking for my entire life. I have been isolating myself for about a year from neurotypical social outings (group activities, dinners/nights at...
  7. Beanfinity

    So masking? How can you tell the difference between the real you and the masked you?

    I call my mask a 'social script', like computer programming or a screenplay. In almost all social situations, I prefer to observe. I prefer to listen, and only respond when spoken to. I enjoy people's presence without the need to interact with them. But that's not how people usually socialize...
  8. Beanfinity

    Sleeping alone vs. With your partner in bed

    That's true, I never really thought of that. I can really squish myself in between the back and seat cushions, it's comfy. And sometimes I like to sleep with one leg in the air, on the back of the couch. Can't do that in bed!
  9. Beanfinity

    Sleeping alone vs. With your partner in bed

    Plushie squad! I do remember when I had my bed all to myself in the past, I would let my (very large) dog onto the bed. I was totally comfortable with that. But humans? eeeh, idk lol
  10. Beanfinity

    Sleeping alone vs. With your partner in bed

    I do enjoy the occasional cuddle, and sometimes the heavy weight of his arms helps me fall asleep. But, I too toss and turn a lot before sleep finally gets to me, and it's hard to do that with someone right next to you! Starting to realize I cannot have all spaces in the house shared - I need...
  11. Beanfinity

    Sleeping alone vs. With your partner in bed

    Aah, the couch. I find it a lot easier to fall asleep on the couch a lot of the time. I wonder if it's because it's 'my own space' and I can toss and turn without worry of disturbing my partner. Coming to the realization it may be more difficult for me to accommodate others than I thought!
  12. Beanfinity

    Sleeping alone vs. With your partner in bed

    So I read somewhere that it is not uncommon for autistic people to have difficulty sleeping in the same bed as their partner. Now, I am a VERY light sleeper, always have been. Since moving in with my partner my sleep has gotten progressively worse. Some of that can be explained by headaches...
  13. Beanfinity

    In the workplace - being told to work differently / slower

    Hi Shevek, this is some great advice. I am my worst enemy though, and some stuff gets in the way. Like taking company time to do other things. I do like to be straightforward and honest and transparent with my colleagues, and I'm pretty sure I'm not allowed to use company time to pursue other...
  14. Beanfinity

    In the workplace - being told to work differently / slower

    Yeah, I can relate for sure. I like to help out and feel useful, cuz that's my strength and sense of worth in the workplace. I'm not the most enjoyable to just 'hang out' with or 'chit chat' with, so I gotta work lol
  15. Beanfinity

    In the workplace - being told to work differently / slower

    Haha, funny you mention this, I might find myself in the same boat in the future! My boyfriend and I have chats about moving to a small town, or going into entrepreneurship. We both don't really like working for other people.
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