Son gets bullied by two classmates

[Aproudmom]

My youngest son gets bullied at times by two classmates and the principal does take care of the problems not blaming him. Happened again in class this morning and his 1st period teacher witnessed it and both were written up to the principal's office. I came in feuding mad after getting the call and pointing the finger at their parents. Not blaming the principal and I almost slugged one of the dad's after saying my son is a freak. The principal held me back preventing me to do it. I know this dad, he is an a-hole and screws me at one towing yard auction I go to. We almost did fight at one with the cops involved with him told to leave. Started with him splashing coffee on me in my face. Mom, she does not care at all not wanting to do a thing. I am getting sick and tired of it and next will seeing a lawyer on these parents. The parents of the other classmate doing this, they tried everything with him to stop it and know my son has Aspergers. Good thing is they are going to work with me and know it needs to stop. Know one solution, their son needs to stop hanging around this so called friend of his being a negative influence on him

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Kids that age can really suck... as adults, looking back, we all know this. Now, even if your son stops hanging around these kids... he might not... you don't have that much control in that situation. Even if these other kids totally stop their bullying... highly unlikely... you can't stop them from gossip and reputation destruction online and at school. Kids these days don't just leave this crap at school... it follows them when they are at home and online... it is persistent.

Let's be honest with ourselves here. He's different enough from his peers that they are always going to point it out, tease, and bully because he is not conforming to their perception of what is "normal". If it's not these two kids, it will be others.

Once people are over 18, are able to be out on their own, a university campus, a community of like-minded people who are accepting, much of this will change. It's getting them past these years that are such a challenge.

As a parent, I cannot give you much advice as to what to do specifically, but do know this is not going to stop in this current environment. It will be like a game of "Whack-a-Mole"... bop one kid on their head, another will pop up, again and again and again. Meanwhile, your son sinks emotionally and psychologically into Hell.

Some of our members here on the forums have some horrible stories and it has deeply affected them well into adulthood.

 

[Aproudmom]

Kids that age can really suck... as adults, looking back, we all know this. Now, even if your son stops hanging around these kids... he might not... you don't have that much control in that situation. Even if these other kids totally stop their bullying... highly unlikely... you can't stop them from gossip and reputation destruction online and at school. Kids these days don't just leave this crap at school... it follows them when they are at home and online... it is persistent.

Let's be honest with ourselves here. He's different enough from his peers that they are always going to point it out, tease, and bully because he is not conforming to their perception of what is "normal". If it's not these two kids, it will be others.

Once people are over 18, are able to be out on their own, a university campus, a community of like-minded people who are accepting, much of this will change. It's getting them past these years that are such a challenge.

As a parent, I cannot give you much advice as to what to do specifically, but do know this is not going to stop in this current environment. It will be like a game of "Whack-a-Mole"... bop one kid on their head, another will pop up, again and again and again. Meanwhile, your son sinks emotionally and psychologically into Hell.

Some of our members here on the forums have some horrible stories and it has deeply affected them well into adulthood.

He does not hang around them at all

 

[Outdated]

Childhood memories, I really didn't have much fun as a kid.

When it comes to other kids your son is at an extreme disadvantage and kids being kids means he's going to have a miserable time of it no matter how hard you try. The reason:

Our brains grow and mature to a different pattern than most other kids. With normal kids they start developing social intelligence from around age 5 but their intellectual maturity doesn't begin until much later. With autistic kids the intellectual maturity comes first and social maturity doesn't begin until much later.

There's nothing you can do to alter this growth pattern, there's no point trying to teach a kid something if the part of their brain needed to handle that concept hasn't finished developing yet.

In effect, an average autistic 8 year old has an intellectual maturity similar to that of a normal 12 year old, but they only have the social maturity of a 4 year old.

A strange phenomena has been happening in Australia over the last couple of decades. A lot of parents started pulling their autistic children out of schools and home schooling them instead. With the easiest targets taken away from the bullies they started picking on other kids and all of a sudden there seemed to be a pandemic of bullying in our public schools. More and more parents have started pulling their kids out of school regardless of autism.

It has now got to the point of becoming a dramatic cultural shift away from the old public schooling paradigm. Schools are trying to adapt but in reality they're in danger of becoming defunct. Instead we now have a new potential social issue developing where home schooling social groups are forming but the country has no legislation or regulation in place to provide protections for these groups.

Homeschool 'drop-off' groups are booming but some say they are unregulated