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UberScout

UberScout

V.I.P Member
Please Don't Be Mad At Me 02/09/1996 29
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  • UberScout
    Has anyone else here ever been so through so many consecutive months (or even years!!) of being stressed out to know end each day, that you start to notice… *things* happening to you mentally?? Like… I have this new fascination with Lovecraftian horror now. I used to cringe hard at it. But now… my brain responds to it like any other form of art or media. Entertained. Not horrified.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Then there’s the anti-catharsis of seeing all these new indie games that I CAN’T PLAY BECAUSE ALL I HAVE IS A PHONE… This one:
    Look Outside.

    My God, it’s just beautiful out there!! Look how colorful and vibrant it is!!
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Trying so hard, SO SO HARD to cope. And it’s not that I can’t. It’s just that I have forgotten all my other, more “mundane” go-to coping skills, except for Aloe of course. Although, it becomes more difficult as The Oasis continues to acknowledge real life’s winter season…
    UberScout
    I have to be very honest about something. Recently, since last year, all of last year… I have been feeling significant damage to my mental health. Aloe lives, she cannot be hurt by something like this. Only I can.

    Videos of game play throughs have been keeping me entertained. Weed has kept me calm. THE COLD IS KEEPING ME SHAKEN AND BLURRY HEADED
    UberScout
    Something that the universe never says about going through life: When you’re a young adult, coffee is a boost to keep you going. When you’re about to turn 30, coffee becomes NECESSARY!!
    UberScout
    Past week now I have a pulled muscle on left side of my chest because I fell off my bike. Coughing just….. hurts…
    FayetheADHDsquirrel
    FayetheADHDsquirrel
    Ouch! I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you get to feeling better soon.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Starting to feel better now but early this morning while it was still dark it felt like somebody had just dropped a house on my chest..
    UberScout
    It's just nothing but faith-killingly depressing when you have a mother with barely any mental illness at all but a stepfather who's like %1000 schizo and just because you're autistic and bad at doing anything perfectly he decides to hate you and turn on you emotionally.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    And no matter how much I pray and beg God for mercy, this is the ONE THING he chooses not to fix.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I almost hung myself with a paranoid from my survival kit this morning because of the rude awakening I got that lead to this whole day. Still hated.
    UberScout
    "This is Bravo 7 re iterating previous request for care package. Squad is experiencing malnutrition. Most common request appears to be mass quantities of rotisserie chicken. Over."
    UberScout
    Borogrove.app turns out to not even use the Standard Rule Definitions rulebook for I7 so I can't even setup my everyday game engine (money handling, liquid volume etc.) How am I going to program 2 liters of infinite Pepsi now?!

    I HAVE CUSTOMERS WAITING, DAMN IT
    UberScout
    Somebody, please... PLEASE.... S-SO.... H-H-HUNGRY

    NFGKHH I N- I NEED

    R O T E S S E R I E
    C H I C K E N
    UberScout
    FIVE DAYS IN THE HOTEEEEEEEEEEEL
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Trillium was supposed to have us in a house last year but they have been dragging their feet ever since. This is a really sketchy bad part of town we are in and we are kind of like really stranded here at the moment.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Hotel is temporary but more accessible, there are dozens of them around here in Wilmington, only problem is when ssi funds run out we have to fend for ourselves until the next check...
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Needless to say... my folks and I are hanging on by a thread and we need some serious, real friends in our lives right now.
    UberScout
    If anybody on this site, anybody at all, is able to help provide support or assistance getting out of this bind i am in, please, please contact me immediately. There is no violence or physical abuse happening, I'm just tired of things being this way and I don't want to make them deal with my own mental fits because of it.
    UberScout
    Still sick with a bad cold since last week. Step-dad now complains how I haven't gotten up to do anything. Says I'm not really sick. Didn't sleep last night due to a coughing fit that made my throat hurt bad. Hate this life.
    UberScout
    Good lord on his golden throne above. Christmas Eve/Day was HELL. Step-dad went so manic he eventually just completely lost focus for about 3 days of our whole stay at the Baymont. Did not even get to celebrate the holiday. Never celebrating again.
    tree
    tree
    Does he receive any treatment
    for emotional/mental health?
    UberScout
    >> There's this older guy and his wife and I think older sister or something. Seems nice enough so I ask if he can spare a few bucks for a bagel or something, down on my luck etc. Originally shakes his head no and says "You're on your own, bud." I kid you not five seconds later when they leave he comes right back and gives me $7, and even apologized to me!
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Tbh I wasn't even upset by it. But hey, you really can't stay mad at a guy like that.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    He didn't want to do it in front of his wife. I have received tips from working as waitress like this. They don't want to tip me in front of their wife. Glad you are at site.
    UberScout
    Aight get this. Stuck downtown at home right now because it's gotten below 30 Fahrenheit out here, and we decided to go stay at the warming shelter (there's a baptist church here right after the Cotton Exchange, every year they open for a week to a few days or so). This afternoon, went and sat on a bench where some commonly-seen spirits (yes, my hometown is haunted... fun fact: one of them likes music.) hang out >>
    UberScout
    Got myself a survival kit from Walmart. And it would be day 4 or so of following my stepdad's "soldier life" teachings. To be brutally honest, considering my usual opinions here on my status wall, actually doing what he has been going over with me is not only causing EVERYTHING I should have been learning and picking up on this whole time to stick like glue, I've actually been enjoying it!
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