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Recent content by Shonda

  1. S

    Can feelings change?

    I hope it gets easier for you too. When this first happened, it felt like no one else could possibly understand what I was going through. My closest friends and family would tell me to forget him, he is not a good person for ghosting on you, a coward, etc. But I know in my heart, that because he...
  2. S

    Can feelings change?

    It's incredible. It seemed the same with us as well. We definitely had a honeymoon period. It was definitely too hot too quick and I should have pumped the brakes in retrospect. I do believe he cared/(s) about me as a person. But I do feel as though he could not express it at the time. It's...
  3. S

    NT people who do half a job!

    I know so many people like this. It's so unfortunate. I always say, even if I don't like my job, that's no one's fault but mine, and I shouldn't be imposing on other people to make them miserable as well. People do a "half-assed" job because they don't care. And the worst part of all of it is...
  4. S

    Can feelings change?

    Thank you so much for this. I am honestly not the relationship type, but this person changed my life. Because of him, I have a completely different outlook on life and other people. Some days are easier than others, but it is always somewhat difficult. I agree that the best advice is to focus on...
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    autistic friend being abused

    I am so so sorry to hear about your friend. I too had a friend dear to my heart who was bullied as a child, because of the quirks that came with his Aspergers. The consequences of this bullying followed him into adulthood, and it makes things hard for him sometimes. Leaving home is the hardest...
  6. S

    what things that you do are unique to you?

    Not sure if this counts, but sometimes, I will space out and trace one particular word from what I hear (from someone talking to me, background noise, etc.) onto any surface near me. It's hard to explain, especially when someone asks me what I'm doing.
  7. S

    My husband seems to have no sexual morals?

    He hasn't been formally diagnosed with ASD, so maybe you guys should work on getting a formal diagnosis just for peace of mine. Either way, ASD does not necessarily mean he will exhibit unusual sexual behaviors. Role playing can be an aspect of NT and aspie relationships, but cheating should be...
  8. S

    New Year's Eve and nothing to do...

    Hi! I feel you. My boss had originally scheduled me to work, and then last minute changed the schedule so I would be working Christmas instead of New Year's. I did not get to see my family for any holidays this year. I just found out my ex is dating a new girl on Christmas Eve. And though I was...
  9. S

    Revelations

    Some relationships are like that. And they are beautiful even if they don't last.
  10. S

    Revelations

    Doesn't it feel good to know? You hear stories of people reconnecting after years, and it works out or it doesn't. But the nice thing is ultimately knowing, right? I honestly hope I can reconnect with him one day and know for sure. Some people say I am being stubborn, and romanticizing, etc. But...
  11. S

    How to keep the love going

    Hello dear. I deeply feel for you. I dated an aspie man for a while, and I do understand how it feels to have a lack of validation in the relationship. I would like to hear "I love you" everyday. However (and someone PLEASE correct me if I am wrong) to my ex, it did not seem necessary to say...
  12. S

    Going Nowhere

    I think you may need to explore where the misunderstandings are arising. If one person says, "I don't understand" the other person should ask "well, what part was not clear." Saying things such as, "I guess I'm just stupid and cannot get it" is a closed form of communication, which does not...
  13. S

    Revelations

    Hi everyone. I am very new to this site, but I feel as though I have gained so much insight from being here. I have mentioned before that my ex boyfriend was an aspie. He never actually told me, I found out by accident. He abruptly ended our relationship. One day it was peaches and cream, the...
  14. S

    Can feelings change?

    Thanks for all your insight everyone. I appreciate all the advice. Some of it was hard to hear but offered great insight. As an NT, I have always assumed it was hard for aspies to change. For this reason, when I think of my ex telling me certain things about him, but seeing him supposedly...
  15. S

    Can feelings change?

    I really appreciate this insight. Yes, I do believe that it is crazy to promise someone an eternity of everlasting love. However, some men assume that all women want that. There is nothing wrong with having a honeymoon phase, a relationship phase, and then even a best friend phase. Maybe you...
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