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Recent content by DuckRabbit

  1. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    "Survive"; I don't imagine they thrive!
  2. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    Do you mean those with compliments may also have difficulty receiving thanks? i.e., it feels uncomfortable to be thanked? Or do you mean they would also feel awkward thanking somebody? Could autistic individuals who have difficulty receiving compliments (because they think they don't deserve...
  3. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    That's an interesting interpretation, I can completely identify with that way of thinking. That could be an actual mis-use of thanks -- when it creates chilly distance and formality, where as you say, between family and close friends, there should be more easy give and take as everyone is...
  4. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    That sounds like a nice, supportive environment - both at work and at home. People can put up with almost any stresses and strains as long as the emotional atmosphere is conducive - warm, appreciative, nurturing.
  5. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    Just as you would like your lack of thanks to not mean anything, have you considered that compulsive thankers might also not want their thanks to mean anything, but some people take it as a signal of high OR lower status? e.g., thanking a subordinate for a service discharged (You may say...
  6. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    You make a very good point. For some people living in poverty, or who have suffered discrimination, or who have a history of trauma, or whose mental or physical health problems have had a devastating impact, to be told that trying to feel grateful might help may feel like an insult. That is not...
  7. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    Few people help with the EXPECTATION of gratitude; one helps out of goodwill - to put someone else in a better position from having crossed your path. But there is also such a thing as entitled narcissists, takers and free-riders. If one continues giving to such creatures, one becomes a doormat...
  8. DuckRabbit

    When showing GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION backfires and makes you worse off

    Have you ever not been thanked for something that you did for someone, that actually cost you quite a lot, and this has soured your attitude towards that person? Conversely, have you ever received a deliberative expression of thanks and appreciation that has boosted your mood and encouraged you...
  9. DuckRabbit

    Writing emails that are too long

    Read on Instagram: "When you hear someone over-explaining, know one (or all) of these is true: They need proof/ validation & have often had their reality denied. They’ve been hurt in unpredictable ways & believe it was because they didn’t explain better. They’ve grown up being ignored."...
  10. DuckRabbit

    Writing emails that are too long

    So is quick turn-around, speed. Writing brief emails sometimes conflicts with that - ironically.
  11. DuckRabbit

    Writing emails that are too long

    Resonate with your drive for clarity. The world does not readily accommodate Valid, Accurate and Complete. It prefers vague gesturing, partial, and flitting; god forbid any thought sustained.
  12. DuckRabbit

    Question for those with Autism

    Have you read Charlotte Moore's book about her two son, George and Sam? I think they are classified as "high-level need for support". https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/mar/24/charlotte-moore-autistic-sons...
  13. DuckRabbit

    Writing emails that are too long

    Does anyone else encounter conflict or non-response from the world because of writing overly long emails? Could this be due to ASC hardwiring which predisposes ASC individuals to seeing many inter-related issues, noticing many details and deeming them relevant? Also just finding so many things...
  14. DuckRabbit

    Things you used to think

    It took me a long time to realise that each church had its own denomination. I thought churches were just churches - interchangeable; I didn't know some were for this group of people and others were for that group.
  15. DuckRabbit

    Things you used to think

    I have a male cousin a few years older than me, and when he turned 7, I thought that was an age only boys could be. It 'sounded' like a boys' age - a bit like some sort of synesthesia.
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