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Blog entries by balsabonbon
I’m exhausted. I’m drained all the time. I’m really struggling to hold it together. The evenings are the hardest times for me. I can’t run away any longer, so I’m stuck wide awake with only myself for company. I don’t know how to cope with this. I’m so tense, and my fear of relaxing coupled with...
Sometimes, I'm so overwhelmed that I shut down. The words don't want to come, and everything feels overstimulating, and all I feel like I can do is space out. No thoughts really. Not much feelings either, or so it would seem to an outsider. Really though, it's like the volume is turned to a...
It's never made sense to me why the hardest question for me to answer has always been "Who am I?" You'd think that would be quite a simple thing, but I've found it to be incredibly difficult, complex, confusing and frustrating to even attempt to answer. Perhaps it's because the question is...
Waking in the middle of the night is confusing for me. Things that seem so certain during the daylight hours feel twisted and shadowed. Sometimes even the most simple and good things seem darkened and scary at nighttime. I don't like it.
I guess the easy answer seems to be to stay in bed and...
If you had asked me a year ago if I would be in a healthy, committed relationship with someone who both loves and supports me by today's date, my answer would've been a loud no. It's been a long time coming. It still feels a bit like I've made all of this happiness up, like I am still sitting on...