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You don't like anything

A

Alan tm

Well-Known Member
I get that a lot .
It' because I tend to evaluate things rather than like .
In many ways they are right . Being asked what do I like is a confusing question.

I hear people saying " I love this or that "
I love this coffee , I love this bun, I love my partner.?
Your partner is as loved as your coffee ? What happens when they have a bun and a coffee for you ? Do you blow up with overload ?

You will be hard pushed to get me to use the " love word " , some things I can say I like but its
Not a generalised like .
I won't like a band because of 1 song .

If something works am I also meant to like it ?
If it doesn't work that' a valid reason to not like it But working is just doing what it's ment to do .

I can never discuss these things without causing a social war...... so I don't :)

I think other people view liking in a different way ...must do
 
I can usually calmly discuss most things, apart from Politics, particularly relating to employment! I've been saying for years that employment laws in the UK are a joke because no government since the DDA came in under the late Maggie Thatcher in 1995 has enforced it IMO.
 
Yes, I evaluate/analyze everything, which I think of as exploring, but I guess others would say is critiquing - and apparently when I do this, I come off as critical and complaining, which is not my intention at all.
 
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Ambi said:
Yes, I evaluate/analyze everything, which I think of as exposing, but I guess others would say is critiquing - and apparently when I do this, I come off as critical and complaining, which is not my intention at all.
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evaluate/analyze is exactly what I was told last night by someone I know well .
Same phrase
 
Seems most NTs prefer a cursory comment on much of anything rather than anyone commenting on something with an analytical evaluation. Form over substance. :rolleyes:

Otherwise we're upsetting their curve. :p
 
I do love things that I love. Most stuff that comes up day to say in conversations are not stuff that I like, let alone love.

Like you guys said you where, I am over analytical. If it is praise, they don't mind It, even appreciate it. If it is any forum of critique, it is like a personal attack to them. Where do they get this information From? Why can't I just talk about why I might not like something with good reasons without it being interpreted as something blasphemous?
 
Voltaic said:
I do love things that I love. Most stuff that comes up day to say in conversations are not stuff that I like, let alone love.

Like you guys said you where, I am over analytical. If it is praise, they don't mind It, even appreciate it. If it is any forum of critique, it is like a personal attack to them. Where do they get this information From? Why can't I just talk about why I might not like something with good reasons without it being interpreted as something blasphemous?
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I'm quite awful at criticism. My reason is ( excuse) before I commit to something I've spent an enormous amount of time to get to that decision or design of something. So a 3 second comment on something that's practically made me ill over months to create doesn't go down well . If that person does 3 weeks independent work on the same subject, I'm perfectly fine with criticism. Welcome it .
 
Alan tm said:
I'm perfectly fine with criticism. Welcome it .
Click to expand...
I love constructive and supportive crtisim. Helps me prevent making a fool of myself, and teach me what it is to act normal. Everyone is so hesitant to criticize until it is necessary because people always take offense. For me it depends on how the criticisms is delivered. If it is just to make me feel bad, then yea, I'm not going to revive it well. If it is meant to be helpful, a kind of 'you are doing this wrong, you should instead do this' then I don't just like it but encourage it. I cant tell things about people unless they tell me straight up.
 
Alan tm said:
I get that a lot .
It' because I tend to evaluate things rather than like .
In many ways they are right . Being asked what do I like is a confusing question.

I hear people saying " I love this or that "
I love this coffee , I love this bun, I love my partner.?
Your partner is as loved as your coffee ? What happens when they have a bun and a coffee for you ? Do you blow up with overload ?

You will be hard pushed to get me to use the " love word " , some things I can say I like but its
Not a generalised like .
I won't like a band because of 1 song .

If something works am I also meant to like it ?
If it doesn't work that' a valid reason to not like it But working is just doing what it's ment to do .

I can never discuss these things without causing a social war...... so I don't :)

I think other people view liking in a different way ...must do
Click to expand...
I get the impression that there is no point telling people what I like They only respond if I gossip and I don't do that ,it's a free world I'm slowly understanding what that means and they don't have to be interested in what I'm interested in.
 
Voltaic said:
I love constructive and supportive crtisim. Helps me prevent making a fool of myself, and teach me what it is to act normal. Everyone is so hesitant to criticize until it is necessary because people always take offense. For me it depends on how the criticisms is delivered. If it is just to make me feel bad, then yea, I'm not going to revive it well. If it is meant to be helpful, a kind of 'you are doing this wrong, you should instead do this' then I don't just like it but encourage it. I cant tell things about people unless they tell me straight up.
Click to expand...


My parents are really bad at criticising me , I've had a lot.
I' basically a flop no matter what I do .
 
Coincidentally, I was thinking of the same conundrum lately: a person says that loves coffee (as you said, or anything else) but can't say that loves somebody else? I just concluded that the word 'love' has different meanings, but since those meanings are so similar, sometimes we forget about that. For example (Google):
1-An intense feeling of deep affection.
2-A great interest and pleasure in something.
3-A deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone.
 
Alan tm said:
I get that a lot .
It' because I tend to evaluate things rather than like .
In many ways they are right . Being asked what do I like is a confusing question.

I hear people saying " I love this or that "
I love this coffee , I love this bun, I love my partner.?
Your partner is as loved as your coffee ? What happens when they have a bun and a coffee for you ? Do you blow up with overload ?

You will be hard pushed to get me to use the " love word " , some things I can say I like but its
Not a generalised like .
I won't like a band because of 1 song .

If something works am I also meant to like it ?
If it doesn't work that' a valid reason to not like it But working is just doing what it's ment to do .

I can never discuss these things without causing a social war...... so I don't :)

I think other people view liking in a different way ...must do
Click to expand...
Most people say that about me too. But I believe that NT's often misuse the word love. I use love to describe my feelings for my family I have never once used it to describe my feeling about an inanimate object or a TV show because then it destroys the meaning of the word. I typically use the word passionate or interested but I have a limited set of interests that focus on very deeply.
 
Sabrina said:
Coincidentally, I was thinking of the same conundrum lately: a person says that loves coffee (as you said, or anything else) but can't say that loves somebody else? I just concluded that the word 'love' has different meanings, but since those meanings are so similar, sometimes we forget about that. For example (Google):
1-An intense feeling of deep affection.
2-A great interest and pleasure in something.
3-A deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone.
Click to expand...
Sabrina do you think deep affection and unconditional are the same thing I got very confused by adjectives thanks
 
I was told by an NT that they never use the word love to describe an inanimate object. Such as " I love coffee."
Then I had an Aspie friend say: " I love coffee."
I use the word love more for inanimate objects than people and it feels awkward to say I love you even when someone says it to me.

I like the three Google explanations @Sabrina
The use of number two is how I use the word the most.
 
Streetwise said:
Sabrina do you think deep affection and unconditional are the same thing I got very confused by adjectives thanks
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No, it's not the same. I think the only unconditional love there is (at least for me, it is different for other people) is the love a parent should have towards their kid. That is not how my parents loved me, but that's how I love my children.

I suppose deep affection would be next in line.

That's in the dictionary that I have in my mind, it doesn't work for everybody else. For more accuracy, a real dictionary is needed:).
 
Sabrina said:
No, it's not the same. I think the only unconditional love there is (at least for me, it is different for other people) is the love a parent should have towards their kid. That is not how my parents loved me, but that's how I love my children.

I suppose deep affection would be next in line.

That's in the dictionary that I have in my mind, it doesn't work for everybody else. For more accuracy, a real dictionary is needed:).
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Oh thanks I will chew that over !!!for a long long time , that's me
 
I had this issue for a long time. In the end, people don't really 'love' or 'like' people or things. These are just words used by them to describe that something is [highly] pleasant for their senses. This is how I started to describe it as well. Still, it seems so exaggerated to me that at times I want to shut them up with their 'Oooooh, cooool, I love it toooo!'. It's acceptable. It's likable. Is the screaming really necessary?

Also, 'love'. People don't seem to love in real meaning of this word. Because NTs just use words because they sound nice, they shout that they love everything while rarely meaning it. When I say something, it's the truth as I see it. If I love someone, I love them in my own way. It means that it would be hard to exist without awareness that they are somewhere there going around their business, hopefully being happy. If I love something, it means I would be really hard pressed to go on without it. It includes my, hm, 'obsessions'.

Though, no obsession I ever had was as strong as people's obession with sex.
 
Judge said:
Seems most NTs prefer a cursory comment on much of anything rather than anyone commenting on something with an analytical evaluation. Form over substance. :rolleyes:

Otherwise we're upsetting their curve. :p
Click to expand...
Ye, they 'love' when people lie and beat around the bush, ye! ;)
 
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