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Yay I'm glad this exists!

Gr82bk8

Active Member
Hello out there! I am a NT gal crazy in love with her aspie guy and hoping to learn and understand as much as i can from all of you! :):p
 
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Very nice to know that there are girls like you out there. I'm sure you'll find many people here pleased to answer your questions if we can, it's a learning opportunity for us to hear your questions and responses to our answers too. Welcome.
 
Thank you, everyone! It's very nice to be welcomed so warmly!
Good luck to you. Hope you learn a lot from the forum. Are you struggling with your aspie guy? Do you find it difficult?
Re your question felines, i wouldn't say i'm struggling with my guy overall-- we're very perfectly matched in most ways. The main thing i struggle with is dealing with the contrast between times when he is very palpably emotionally engaged with me, and the times where the connection and emotions he feels toward me are hanging out somewhere below the surface where i can't outwardly perceive them. We are so deeply and intensely connected when those things are at or near the surface that when they recede it feels very disorienting and sad for me-- like the clouds have blocked out the sun. Now that we know he's an aspie i understand what's going on during those times so i don't take it personally and do my best to switch gears into listening to his other love language of things like his many considerate actions, his preference to be together everyday, and the fact that he never gets bored and never needs or wants a break from being around me, and is still just as intetested in sex. That said, it's still hard for me, because my emotions never hibernate beneath the surface, they're always right there needing to be expressed and received, and it's hard to feel like they're being tolerated or allowed rather than enjoyed. But i also know the fact that he allows and and does his best to go along with my demonstrations when he's in his more closed off mode is also hugely demonstrative of his real feelings. So i find myself in this thought loop of constant self governance whenever that's happening, which helps but can get exhausting and still doesn't totally alleviate the feeling of longing and loss (even if temporary) i feel when the sun goes away. Bet you didn't expect that long of a response lol!
 
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