work related struggles

[confused_becca]

I'm not sure if this is aspie related,
but some of my problems are remembering details
and just memory problems in general

I currently work at my uncles law firm
and i live in his house
I've moved here after working at wal-mart, and i'm great full to have a job, but this morning my aunt dropped a semi bombshell on me.
I've been making a lot of little mistakes, and that whenever any one has a task needed to get done, they rather do it themselves then come to me, because they risk having it take 3 times as long.
I've done things like :
Scan a client file into the wrong account with same last name
Put the wrong date on spreadsheets
Forgot to put tissues on the office shopping list (apparently its a bigger deal then that sounds)

no one tells me that I've messed up except for my aunt.

My aunt (who is the office manager) will give me subtle hints, and makes jokes about my mistakes, and i'm having a hard time reading what i'm doing wrong exactly
today she asked me "do you have bad memory problems? do you need accommodations? or do you simply don't care about your job?'

one of my biggest weaknesses is trying to confront people, saying exactly how i feel, and conveying that message correctly

i almost always mess up and it comes out wrong

does this sound familiar to any one else?


perhaps I'm not cut out for the office

 

[Spinning Compass]

Yes, been there and done that.

It sounds like both of you have a communications issue, and the fact that you are working for a relative that you also live with makes it worse.

You might not be cut out for that particular type of work. You don't say what your skills and education level are. Have you gone to an employment counselor or temporary agency to get a skills assessment?

I don't work in a law firm, but my job is equally demanding in terms of client confidentiality. The big difference is if I put the wrong document in the wrong file, it can cost my company millions of dollars in lost business. The companies that contract work to my company demand strict confidentiality because it's a very competitive business involving trade secrets. If word gets out that my company is careless about handling their accounts, well, there's a lot of competition out there. So, yes, I have to be on my toes. Do you feel comfortable sitting down with your aunt and asking her for suggestions on how to improve your work? Because reading between the lines, it sounds like she is concerned that your mistakes may cost them business and that you don't appear to be taking this seriously enough. She's trying to tell you something but doesn't want a confrontation.

 

[2010Dolby]

The part about confronting people sounds very familiar. I can only confront people about a problem if Im personally pissed off and what to kick their ***. But work related confrontations Iv never been good at.

And that list of minor work errors is very familiar to. Iv always found that once Iv worked at a job for about a year or so then I know it very well and excel at it. But until then I can get the major tasks done but the little smaller things I get pretty flustered about. For advice, I think its a learning curve thing. And considering my Asperger's I think I have a longer lurning curve then NTs and it may be an Asperger's trait that you're experiencing too.

 

[Occasional_Demon]

If your aunt's asking you the reasons for your performance, and if she's hinted as to whether you require accommodations or have issues with memory...then I'd be upfront with her. From what you've said, it sounds like your aunt would like to help you, but she can't help if she's not aware of your problems.

Her not knowing what exactly is happening with you can lead to the assumption that you simply "don't care", and from my own experiences, once someone develops a negative view of you, it can make working quite uncomfortable.

I also think you should talk to your aunt and be upfront about your difficulties. Also, it could be that the job is below your capabilities which can lead to careless errors. I've found that if I take a job below my capabilities or if I'm not being sufficiently challenged enough, I tend to lose concentration and forget little details.

 

[BruceCM]

Basically, if your attention to detail isn't good, you're not really going to be good at any office work! Sorry. Often, in spreadsheets, there's sums, too. To add up rows/ or columns & so on. Hence, one digit of one number being wrong can throw the whole thing out. There's not really 'accomodations' for that sort of thing. There must be work that'd suit you better, though. What are you good at or like doing?

 

[confused_becca]

unfortunately i need to stick this job out, there really isn't any jobs out there
I'm currently in college
i've done some business computer classes
and my experience is in retail

 

[epath13]

I'm not sure if this is aspie related,
but some of my problems are remembering details
and just memory problems in general

I currently work at my uncles law firm
and i live in his house
I've moved here after working at wal-mart, and i'm great full to have a job, but this morning my aunt dropped a semi bombshell on me.
I've been making a lot of little mistakes, and that whenever any one has a task needed to get done, they rather do it themselves then come to me, because they risk having it take 3 times as long.
I've done things like :
Scan a client file into the wrong account with same last name
Put the wrong date on spreadsheets
Forgot to put tissues on the office shopping list (apparently its a bigger deal then that sounds)

no one tells me that I've messed up except for my aunt.

My aunt (who is the office manager) will give me subtle hints, and makes jokes about my mistakes, and i'm having a hard time reading what i'm doing wrong exactly
today she asked me "do you have bad memory problems? do you need accommodations? or do you simply don't care about your job?'

one of my biggest weaknesses is trying to confront people, saying exactly how i feel, and conveying that message correctly

i almost always mess up and it comes out wrong

does this sound familiar to any one else?


perhaps I'm not cut out for the office

I think those problems are not that hard to resolve. you can at least try, if it doesn't work, it doesn't work what can you do.

1st
your aunts response was purely emotional, and it reflects her inability to deal with situation and actually, poor management skills. But you're not there to judge her but to do your job well until you can find something else (if you'd like to) so you can try to do just that.

2nd
you probably have to do certain routine tasks, what I mean by that is that those tasks can be broken into small predictable steps. What you can do is to try write down all the tasks that you perform and break them into steps. Then just follow the steps so you don't forget anything. You can even use a flow chart for that purpose. Here's a link that might be helpful:
Flow Charts - Problem Solving Techniques from MindTools.com

you've said you're in college, if your relatives can't help you with those organization tools then maybe you can ask one of your instructors to direct you to someone who can help you to create that kind of flow chart.

And by the way use of organization tools does not make you disabled or anything like that, it means that you're addressing the problem and coming up with a solution like lots of people do every day whether they are on the spectrum or not.