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Who relates to the symptom of paranoia

Discussion in 'Autism Science Discussions' started by Moonhart44, Oct 9, 2020.

  1. Moonhart44

    Moonhart44 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I think i blamed it on my recreational use for a long time, but i realized that i have always been this way. I remember being very young and thinking aliens or monsters were watching me, and i would imagine how they would look. when i got more in school, thats when i went away from monsters and into people, or my peers. (Even typing this down, I am remembering more things). I remember at one point getting upset to the point of tears because I felt like couldn't relax because I was always being watched.
    When I was younger I believed people could read my mind, particularly my dad. With my dad, I believed he just somehow had this ability, but with others, I believed that they were in my mind using a form of technology. I asked my dad at one point whether he could read my mind, and he said no, and i believed him.

    Nowadays I have hallucinations of people in the corner of my eye, someone waiting for me to talk to them, someone there to give me something social to do. But, upon looking, there is always something there that i just mistook for a person, and i conclude it to be paranoia.

    i was wondering if others had similar experiences to this.
     
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  2. Trophonius

    Trophonius Well-Known Member

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    I had a mild paranoia until I was 18. It stopped on its own apparently, as I got more busy I paid less attention to that kind of thoughts.
     
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  3. Bolletje

    Bolletje Overly complicated potato V.I.P Member

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    I have occasional bouts of bad paranoia, I have had them ever since my teens. For me it’s closely related to my bipolar disorder and it most often occurs when my depression is really bad. At those times my paranoia often dips a toe into the delusional (and sometimes plunges into the deep end of delusion).
    With the paranoia usually comes social withdrawal and a tendency to be difficult to get a hold of. When my parents and sister can’t reach me during the day they generally know they’re about to get a “hey so things aren’t going great for me right now” talk from me in the nearby future.
     
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  4. Bolletje

    Bolletje Overly complicated potato V.I.P Member

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    To add to my previous post, I just wanted to state that hallucinations and paranoia are very different things. They can coexist but paranoia is strictly cognitive, a thought disorder, whereas hallucinations are strictly related to the senses.
    Anyway, thinking you’re seeing things out of the corner of your eye when they’re not really there would be a hallucination or a manifestation of anxiety, but it wouldn’t be paranoia. It would be a type of paranoia if there were actually people there and you think they’re (just an example) talking about you or after you.

    I hope I didn’t come off as pedantic, I don’t mean to be. I just wanted to clear up a common misconception :)
     
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  5. Moonhart44

    Moonhart44 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    it's fine and you didnt come across that way
    yeh i defintely relate to the social withdrawal thing, being hard to reach thing. I feel bad but i also want to avoid avoid avoid.
    i do feel the sense that people are after me or talking about me. I am not sure if always believed this, or was always inclined to believe this, because of the feeling of being watch at all times, or its a result of my own personal experience, in that it has happened many times, and now i just assume.

    i never realized how calm i appeared to people because apparently to them i am being rude or mean or cold. i recently told a couple people about my depression and i was surprised that they were shocked.
     
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  6. Bolletje

    Bolletje Overly complicated potato V.I.P Member

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    I can relate.
     
  7. oregano

    oregano Your time will come...

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    A little levity for a serious subject (I was reminded of this song by this thread):



    Somebody's Watching Me by Rockwell. This song is VERY OLD (1983), and only the Gen Xers who were old enough to hear it first run on the radio recall it. Apparently there was a cover of it that was somewhat popular a few years ago, but to me there is only one version, the original. It's the sort of thing that wouldn't be possible today in our social justice social milieu.
     
  8. LunaticCentruroides

    LunaticCentruroides New Member

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    Ohh we are similar in some ways. Since when do you have the hallucinations?

    I became paranoid due to excessive drug use as well but it already decreased fully fortunately. I was very anxious and fearful as kid as well. The paranoid state of mind was just a result of the things that were already there in combination with the drugs. I thought people and the police were after me, everybody is looking at me and reading my mind…. Being followed, observed and **** etc… I felt strange my whole life, but the drugs made it really really bad. The truman show...
     
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  9. HeroOfHyrule

    HeroOfHyrule Chicken Chaser

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    As a kid I was pretty paranoid and used to think everyone could read my thoughts, and sometimes I still have to reason with myself and remind myself that people can't do that. I think in my case it's because people are recognizing emotions/thoughts I might be having via body language that I'm not noticing myself, and since I'm not good at picking up on that I don't always realize that's why people seem to know what I'm thinking/feeling. So I get confused and paranoid.
     
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  10. Gift2humanity

    Gift2humanity Well-Known Member

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    That must have been scary.