The Woodchuck Game

[Nervous Rex]

Try to come up with variations of "How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"

Examples:

How many boroughs would a burro burrow if a burro could burrow boroughs, bro?

How many yews would youse ewes use if youse ewes could use yews?

How many Sikhs would a sick Sikh sic if a sick Sikh could sic Sikhs? (Answer: six)

I came up with the first one on my own. I came up with a ton more by looking at the homonyms listed on this site.

 

[tree]

This reminds me so much of what I think about when I am walking.
Variations.

I carry a notebook with me and a pen tied by a string so that I don't
lose it, and write stuff down while I walk.

 

[Pats]

It's not the woodchuck one, but one that's been with me since elementary school -
The tutor who tooted a flute tried to teach two young tooters to toot. Said the two to the tutor, is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?

 

[Mia]

How many malls would a moll maul if a moll mauled malls?

 

[tlc]

I don't know but my dad used to work with a guy named Chuck Wood. He was a big guy and was like "Don't even say it. I've kicked the crap out of a lot of guys for saying that."

 

[Nervous Rex]

It's not the woodchuck one, but one that's been with me since elementary school -
The tutor who tooted a flute tried to teach two young tooters to toot. Said the two to the tutor, is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?

I love that one! I read it in a joke book my grandmother had. Every time we would go to her house, I would read the book over and over. Jokes and silly poems like that were my first uncontrollable obsession.

That book also had this one:
A canner exceedingly canny,
One morning remarked to his granny:
"A canner can can
Anything that he can,
But a canner can't can a can, can he?

When I went to look up that one, I also found this one:
How many cans can a canner can, if a canner can can cans? A canner can can as many cans as a canner can can, if a canner can can cans.

 

[Nervous Rex]

The tutor who tooted a flute tried to teach two young tooters to toot. Said the two to the tutor, is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?

A friend taught me this one:

A flea and a fly in a flue
Were stuck, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "Let us flee!"
Said the flea, "Let us fly!"
So they flew out a flaw in the flue.


Maybe I should have called this the Excessive Eulalia thread.

 

[Pats]

A friend taught me this one:

A flea and a fly in a flue
Were stuck, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "Let us flee!"
Said the flea, "Let us fly!"
So they flew out a flaw in the flue.


Maybe I should have called this the Excessive Eulalia thread.

A couple others I remember from my childhood that I've always recited.
I wish that my room had a floor.
I don't so much care for a door.
But this walking around without touching the ground
Is getting to be quite a bore.

But one from an old nighttime tv show "Hoolihan and Big Chuck"
When you go to kiss your honey
And her nose is kind of runny
Don't think it's funny
Cause it's not.

Yes, I know - they're just silly poems, not tongue twisters. I don't know why I remember those.

 

[tlc]

How many sticky sticks would Styx stick if Styx could stick sticky sticks?

 

[Nervous Rex]

I wish that my room had a floor.
I don't so much care for a door.
But this walking around without touching the ground
Is getting to be quite a bore.

That's by Gelett Burgess. I have a book of his poems. He also wrote The Purple Cow and it's sequel and so many other good ones.

I feel like I've hijacked my own thread. Here's something to get it back on track:

How many Pekes could a Peke peek pique if a Peke peek could pique Pekes?

How many rites would the right wright write if the right wright could write rites?

How many ads would an adze ad add if an adz ad could add ads?

 

[SusanLR]

One I made up a long time ago on the Woodchuck theme:

If a Gopher could go for it, how many goes would a Gopher go for?

An old one:

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, how many pickled peppers did Peter Piper pick?

An old school one:

Oozery, Ozery, Oxery Ann,
Mulberry wax and taggery tan,
Pops and Dick and Steven John,
Hanky Panky Pen and Ink,
Stevey Stovey Steady Stink.

Not all on the same theme, but, odd.

 

[zurb]

This evening, I was watching a youtube video of a ship shipping shipping-ships shipping ships. Which begs the question:
How many shipping-ships shipping ships can a ship shipping shipping-ships shipping ships ship?

 

[okisland]

How many toads could a two-toe'd toad tow if two-toe'd toads tow'd toads?

That felt too easy... I'll try harder later.

 

[Nervous Rex]

.
I carry a notebook with me and a pen tied by a string so that I don't
lose it, and write stuff down while I walk.

I keep Google docs of some stuff. Other stuff I just memorize and save for the right moment to use it.

Then when I say it, people ask if I lie awake at night thinking of those things.

Yes, yes I do.

 

[Nervous Rex]

An old school one:

Oozery, Ozery, Oxery Ann,
Mulberry wax and taggery tan,
Pops and Dick and Steven John,
Hanky Panky Pen and Ink,
Stevey Stovey Steady Stink.

That reminds me of this poem: Sing Me a Song (of Teapots and Trumpets)

 

[SusanLR]

How much jam could a hiphop jam spread jam if a hiphop jam could spread jam?

Jam up and jelly tight...I'll be jam!