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Featured Post Graduation Depression, No Car, stuck in House

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Frostee, Jul 13, 2019.

  1. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    My Graduation is on Monday, I will not be going because the flights are too expensive, and the ferry is expensive.

    So, I am finished University now. I have applied for a few jobs so far, with one Assessment Day, and an Online Interview for my dream job today, so I am making efforts to do things.

    However, meanwhile i'm stuck in my house doing absolutely nothing every single day. I don't have a car to drive, my Sister works every single day up to 9pm (out of boredom).

    She is my only source of going anywhere. My father will not take me anywhere and my mother will not either, beyond 9pm.

    So, as I said I am completely housebound for weeks on end. I have ordered a car, but it will not be coming until September when we leave for Portugal. This means that I will not really have a car until October.

    Basically, I am relying on the generosity of my sister, or indeed her willingness to take me places. However, that willingness is not always there.

    Today for example, my parents and sister all leave me in the house to complete an interview. None of them come home until 9pm.. I ask to go to the cinema, they all say no.

    I am not an individual who is keen on sitting inside the house. I have to get out and go places.

    I can't cope with this!
     
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  2. An Arctic fox

    An Arctic fox Well-Known Member

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    Can you walk places?
     
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  3. GadAbout

    GadAbout Well-Known Member

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    Yes, like Arctic fox suggested, why don't you just walk? (and/or take public transportation)
     
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  4. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    It sounds like things are going wonderfully, though!
     
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  5. Crossbreed

    Crossbreed Neur-D Missionary ☝

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    I was going to suggest a bicycle.
     
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  6. christopher.k

    christopher.k roosterman

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    of course being able to take a lot of stuff around with you on the go is useful but as the others have suggested why not walk/cycle to the places you want to be? provided there not 5+ miles away of course.
     
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2019
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  7. Peter Morrison

    Peter Morrison Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Whenever I feel squeezed into minimal options, I try to make the best of what choices exist. Being a creature of habit, I have to open myself up to creative alternatives. Everyone has already suggested walking or biking somewhere, but you might consider resurrecting an old hobby or starting a new one. If you are going to Portugal, start learning a LOT about Portugal - history, language, geography, art, etc. I can get stuck in the inertia of boredom. The only way out of it is to go out of it. I like the biking idea the best. Physical activity changes one's perspective on anything. The problems are still there - but they don't overtake you. Fight back. You are stronger than you think.
     
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  8. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    Clearly Not. I've moved from an area with buses every 5 minutes to an area where the nearest bus station is 4 miles away with no footpath.
     
  9. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    I live in the countryside, so I have to be dropped off at the Train or Bus Station. I have used these facilities before, but the point is that they're not easily accessible and are inflexible frequency wise.

    It is 9 weeks until my car arrives, but just don't want to wait weeks on weeks without transport. I need my own independence and this is getting me down.

    Having had full access to Public Transport, with a bus running every 5 minutes at my University i'm not getting used to this.
     
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  10. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    As I said, I do get out when my family are in the mood to take me out. For ex, sister has just come in and went to bed so i'll be going nowhere this evening.

    My car arrives in 9 weeks, so it's just coping with that for 9 weeks.

    It's definitely something i'm struggling with big time.
     
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  11. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    Not particularly. The only way I can get about is with family driving me places, or taking the train/bus which are both 4/5 miles from my house and inflexible.
     
  12. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    1. You just graduated.
    2. You have an interview for your dream job.
    3. You're getting a car.

    These are incredible things! Here is your list of bad things going on, in its entirety:

    1. You're unable to see the good things.
     
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  13. GadAbout

    GadAbout Well-Known Member

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    It sounds like your sister and parents have lives of their own. It's absurd to think they will drive you places when they get home at 9 p.m. Have a little initiative. Go for walks in the countryside and watch birds and clouds. The exercise will do you good.

    Or catch a ride into town when they are driving to work - and I don't want to hear you are a late riser and don't want to get up that early.

    If you want sympathy for your current situation, you won't get it from me. I'm one step away from calling you a millenial.
     
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  14. tducey

    tducey Well-Known Member

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    I think in the long run you will be fine. Still in the short term while you wait for work maybe you could walk places as others have said.
     
  15. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    Well, i'm sitting in the house. Day in day out, with no transport.

    This is a downward spiral for me. I need something to do! If I could access public transport I would do so.
     
  16. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    Wow you're a harsh woman.

    My sister had a strop last night anyhow, so not driving me anywhere. Mother sometimes drives me places.

    But as I say, i'm stuck in the house with nowhere to go. I can't go anywhere because the bus and train station are 4 miles away with no footpath.

    I'm stuck in this house.

    I will book a trip to London for the first week of August, but beyond that i've got 9 weeks of nothing.
     
  17. tree

    tree Blue/Green Staff Member V.I.P Member

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    Where is it you need to/want to go?
     
  18. Frostee

    Frostee Well-Known Member

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    Um, I want to get out of the house. I don't have anywhere to be.

    I feel lazy sitting in this house, day in day out.
     
  19. Judge

    Judge Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    You have no perspective to understand this, but this is "downtime" you should be relishing. To just decompress and take it easy, without a care in the world. Take some long walks even, just to get out of the house and away from family and people in general.

    Simple point. Once you're fully integrated in the adult world of having to work and take care of yourself, you won't have all this downtime. That you'll have "somewhere to be" all the time. And you're late.

    So kick back and enjoy what might be your last real respite until you reach retirement. Oh...and look forward to having your own car. That's a big deal. The ultimate manifestation of personal freedom for many folks if they can afford one. Oh- and so is graduating from a university. Bask for a bit in that sunlight of such an accomplishment.

    You may be temporarily bored, but from what I see you're in a relatively good place.
     
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2019
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  20. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Boredom is a privilege! Spend your hours practicing gratitude!
     
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